Don't mean to bring everyone down but the 11th was a bust. I froze on both
performances. I talked with my daughter which is used to performing under
pressure in front of people. She said that until I resolve some self-esteem
issues I will continue to have problems. I am really down right now. All
that practicing for naught. Right now I feel like I not only let the
orchestra down but the Lord as well. I am on the verge of just giving up
playing. I enjoy my guitar and want to share it with other people but maybe
it has to do with my lupus (not looking for excuses) but my heart was
beating out of my chest and my mind went blank in mid stream both times.
Right now it has ruined my Christmas. It will be hard to go to orchestra
practice tomorrow night.

Thank you for thinking about me.

Paulette :(

So it's the 11th Paulette and I'm betting you're all tuckered out.
Rest and we'll see you when you're feeling up to it.
Many hugs
J

Hello all,
Just needed to whine a little. Here I am having a performance on Wed (Dress
Rehearsal) and the real deal on Sunday, Dec. 11 with 2 performances.
And.... I have this pain/ache in my upper middle Shoulder area that is about
to get the best of me. It may be tension or a bad result of a massage I had
last Friday. Sometimes the pain radiates down the back side of my left arm
making it feel like my shoulder is out of socket. My chiropractor says that
she can fix me. 2 visits have not done it yet. Thank goodness I have good
insurance. Maybe it has to do with the additional practicing I'm doing. I
think it has to do with my computer desk job that I have only been doing 20
+ years. The only thing that will help is loritab and anti-inflammatory make
my ears ring. Thank goodness this is Friday. Go home and chill out.

Thanks for letting me rant,

Paulette