How can I find out in advance that the doc I am going to visit may be
the right one for my situation and requirements?  Practically, I can't
check them all till I find the right one, so I need to have some
sorting tools before my visit, but I don't know how to find these
tools.

I need badly a cataract surgery and have already seen 3 potential
surgeons.

The first was at the UMC.  He was rude, didn't want to listen to my
concerns or answer my questions, but worse of all he wanted to operate
on both my bad eye (with a thick cataract) and my good eye (that might
have a beginning of a cataract that does not interfere with my vision
and I absolutely don't want to touch at this stage).  He didn't care
that I wanted implant for intermedate vision rather than distance.
Maybe he knows things that I don't know, but he provided no
explanation.  I was appalled by his attitude and dumped him.

The second doc was probably the best known and most competent in my
area.  He was recommended by my retinologist as the one that he would
take his mother to when she needs a cat surgery.  Until recently he
was the head of Ophtalmology in UMC, but a couple of years ago he left
that prestigious position and started his private practice, where he
probably can make more money.  His record is impressive, my first
visit was promising and he gave me very informative written material,
but...  he was highly impatient when I came back with some questions,
and he tried hard to convince me that Crystalens should be my choice
of implant.  When I refused, he dumped me with the excuse that I don't
trust him.

Then I went to the Eye Center nearby.  Again, the appointment was
hasty, she (the doc) said that she needed a written clearance from my
retinologist since she is not a retina specialist.  I couldn't discuss
anything else with her before she got the clearance, although I
assured her that I had already been cleared for the cat surgery.  My
feeling is that she is not competent to treat my delicate condition
(closed macular hole, re-attached retina with scleral buckle, and
probably a macular pucker or wrinkled retina).  She sent me to a
retina doc to get the "clearance", but I don't feel comfortable going
back to her.

What to do?  How and where can I find the right cat-doc?  My
requirements are as follows:

1.  Someone who will give me more than the famous 17-seconds
appointment, will listen and consider my concerns and wishes, inform
me about what s/he is planning for me and answer my questions.

2.  Someone who will care about me, the person attached to the eye, as
well as about the eye itself.

3.  Someone who can evaluate properly my potential corrected visual
acuity in the bad eye and will make a plan for a lens that will work
together with the good eye at this stage, as well as in the future if,
and when, I need a cataract surgery in the good eye.

3.  Someone who is competent and experienced in complex cases like
mine, with comprensive knowledge of cataracts and retinal conditions.

4.  Someone who will put my well being before his/her financial
interest.

At this point I have a pretty good idea of what I want:

1.  Monofocal for intermediate vision (probably aiming at -2D),
corrected with glasses (probably progressive) for reading and
distance.

2.  Small incision, no stitches, topical anastesia with sedation.

3.  The best correction at this time for the bad eye only, with a
future plan for the good eye (now with -4D) -- must work for vision in
both eyes now and in the future.

4.  Astigmatism will be corrected by glasses, not by limbal surgery.

5.  Procedure with as little risk of complications as possible.

Is it not reasonable?  Is it too much to ask?  How can I find someone
to fulfil my needs without going thru the entire yellow pages?  How
can I make them listen and discuss things with me when they are
rushing?  There must be somebody out there who is caring, competent,
considerate and polite, but how can I find out in advance?