Ed...My heart is with you, and I know what it is like to be emotionally
devastated, and be extremely depressed, and not have an appetite or sleep,
and have a difficult will to go on.  I am not a Christian, but God bless you
and I hope you improve.  You can read one of my posts in the prostatitis
newsgroup if you want. It was dated 5/14/05, and it was a reply to a 5/13/05
post about a Dr. Guercini, so you will have to click on the "+" sign to find
it. It will give you an idea of what I have been going through and hopefully
give you some encouragement knowing you are not alone.  I wish you the best
and try to hang in there.

Pete

Hi Ed
I have been doing ISC since last year because of retention problems.  When I
get to the 'difficult' bit I pause and take a couple of deep calming breaths
and then slowly continue.  You'll know this for yourself of course, but it
does seem to work for me.  Having an in-dwelling catheter for five weeks
last September/October has made grateful for the freedom of ISC but even so
I went through a period of depression around Christmas when I felt that life
was unfair, why should I have to do this when other men didn't? etc., but
gradually I came to realise that's just the way it is and I'm lucky on the
scale of things.  You're right when you mention your emotional attitude as
being the root problem, and if you're suffering from depression then perhaps
you should have a talk with the Doc about medication.  I found St John's
Wort worked wonders for me.  If it isn't clinical depression but just an
emotional thing, then I think the main thing is not to feel hostility
towards the procedure - just relax and go with it.  Remember you're not
alone, there's plenty of us out here doing the same thing!
Best wishes
Huw

Don't forget to pretend you are about to pee - relaxes that sphincter

1  Give yourself time .
2  Insert the cath sloooooooooooooooooowly
3  Whenever and wherever you encounter a problem, stop - wait 30secs -
rotate  the cath -  only then try to introduce the cath farther.
Waiting enables the cath to warm up to your body's temperature and
hence become more flexible.
4  Know that this situation can be lived with.   I have done so for 3
years.