TRUE STORY OF DISCOVERY OF AMERICA -- Columbus.

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Ed Conrad - 09 Feb 2006 16:17 GMT

<
It's a popular misconception to say that ``Columbus took
a chance'' on the journey during which he discovered America.
<
The fact is, he actually was at minimal risk when the Nina, Pinta
nd Santa Maria -- all small vessels -- pulled out of port to sail far
into the Ocean Blue in Fourteen-Hundred-and-Ninety-Two.
<
The plain fact is, Columbus KNEW what he was doing.
<
Granted, he didn't know for sure whether he'd actually discover
a new route to India -- his prime objective -- by sailing due west,
or whether he'd even reach previously unknown land.
<
But he knew, if the weatherman cooperated, he and his crews
would be as safe on their journey as if in their own beds.
<
(By starting his journey in early fall, it might be noted, Columbus
undoubtedly knew that the hurricane season was past. (Ever wonder
why he didn't set leave port in May or June?)
<
In any event, all Columbus and his crew needed was patience, patience
and more patience.
<
Sail on! Sail on! Sail on!
<
The only thing somewhat unusual about the trip was what was sitting
on a table in the center of Columbus' small cabin. It contained a
weird-looking contraption, a cumbersome boxed compass. And every
once in a while, the skipper glanced at the needle to make sure they
were maintaining their due-west course.

Although invented more than a century earlier, the compass was
considered little more than an object of curiosity and nothing better
than an unusual child's toy. But Columbus, aware of its potential,
had been using his compass successfully for years.

On many previous trips into the Wild Blue Yonder, Columbus always
managed to arrive safely back at port in one piece, thanks to his
compass.
<
In fact, it got to the point that his closest friends stopped calling
him Chris or (his last name) Colon. They kiddingly started calling
him ``Columbo," the Latin word for pigeon (Columbus in English).
<
Columbus earned his crews' respect -- and his nickname -- because,
to them, he had developed a reputation as a homing pigeon. No matter
which direction he set sail when bound for the open sea, he ALWAYS
managed to return safely.
<
That Columbus' most intimate friends spoke Latin should come as no
surprise, either, because, after all, he had been born in The Tyrol,
high in the Alps.
<
(It is generally -- and erroneously -- believed that Columbus was
Italian. For one thing, Italy didn't even exist as a country back
then.
And, the fact is, Columbus always avoided mention of where he was
born and "Why?" is anybody's guessd.).
<
Sail on! Sail on! Sail on!
<
``Okay, smartass," you're asking. ``What about a food supply?
If Columbus kept sailing and didn't reach land, wouldn't he and his
crew die of starvation?"
<
The answer, quite obviously, is *NO*.
<
This is because Columbus had a very high IQ and a great deal of
common sense..
<
Before any of his ships left port, numerous barrels containing a
variety of diffferent food items were placed aboard on one side in the
hold. Strangely, the same number of EMPTY same-size barrels were
stationed on the opposite side in the hold.
<
Every mealtime, Columbus and members of the crew would fill their
plates to their liking, then walk over to the once-empty barrels and
dump the different food item items into the appropriate barrel.
<
Then they would return to the first batch of barrels and refill their
plates, then sit down and enjoy their hearty meal.
<
It was simple logic.
<
Columbus knew, by operating in this manner at mealtime, it virtually
guaranteed that no one would starve. See, when the food supply in the
original barrels was depleted -- and land had not yet been sighted --
it was the signal to turn the ships around and head due east, homeward
bound.
<
On the return trip, everyone aboard was assured of having as much to
eat as they had enjoyed in the first few days of their voyage.
<
Oh, yes, one final historical note: Columbus had yellow hair and a red
beard, conclusive proof that his roots were Tyrolean.
<
If you know anybody, or see anybody, with yellow hair and a red
beard, ask where their grandparents or great-grandparents were born.
I'm sure you'll be in for quite a surprise.
<
Ed Conrad

> http://www.edconrad.com

<
Man as Old as Coal
and
Proof of Life After Death
<
.===========================================
<

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<

> TOP 100 U.S. NEWSPAPERS

Rank Newspaper Circulation

>1. USA Today (Arlington, Va.) 2,136,068
>2 . Wall Street Journal 1,800,607
>3. Times (New York, N.Y.) 1,113,000
>4 Times (Los Angeles) 925,135
>5. Post (Washington, DC) 746,724
>6. Daily News (New York, N.Y.) 715,070
>7. Tribune (Chicago) 679,327
>8. Post (New York, N.Y.) 590,061
>9. Newsday (Long Island, N.Y.) 578,809
>10. Chronicle (Houston) 552,052
>11. Chronicle (San Francisco) 512,129
>12. Morning News (Dallas) 505,724
>13. Sun-Times (Chicago) 479,584
>14. Globe (Boston) 467,745
>15. Arizona Republic (Phoenix) 448,782
>16. Star-Ledger (Newark, N.J.) 408,557
>17. Inquirer (Philadelphia) 373,892
>18. Journal-Constitution (Atlanta) 371,161
>19. Free Press (Detroit) 368,839
>20. Plain Dealer (Cleveland) 363,750
>21. Oregonian (Portland) 342,789
>22. Star Tribune (Minneapolis) 342,780
>23. Union-Tribune (San Diego) 342,447
>24. Times (St. Petersburg, Fla.) 333,557
>25. Herald (Miami) 315,340
>26. Post (Denver) 305,060
>27. Rocky Mountain News Denver 304,949
>28. Register (Orange County, Ca.) 300,888
>29. Sun (Baltimore) 300,410
>30. Post-Dispatch (St. Louis) 287,424
>31. Bee (Sacramento, Calif.) 283,194
>32. Mercury News San Jose, Ca. 272,682
>33. Star (Kansas City, Mo.) 269,188
>34. Investor's Business Daily (LA 264,699
>35. Sentinel (Orlando, Fla.) 256,520
>36. Times-Picayune (New Orleans) 255,994
>37. Star (Indianapolis) 254,624
>38. Dispatch (Columbus, Ohio) 251,557
>39. Post-Gazette (Pittsburgh, Pa.) 243,091
>40. Herald (Boston) 242,957
>41. News (Detroit) 242,391
>42. Journal Sentinel (Milwaukee) 242,234
>43. Sun-Sentinel Fort Lauderdale 238,589
>44. Observer (Charlotte, N.C.) 235,759
>45. Times (Seattle) 224,140
>46. News (Buffalo, N.Y.) 223,957
>47. Express-News San Antonio 220,998
>48. Star-Telegram Fort Worth 218,975
> 49. Courier-Journal Louisville, Ky. 217,396
> 50. Tribune (Tampa, Fla.) 214,178
> 51. Daily Oklahoman Oklahoma City 199,581
>52. Virginian-Pilot (Norfolk, Va.) 195,866
>53. Pioneer Press (St. Paul, Minn. 194,870
>54. Courant (Hartford, Conn.) 190,312
>55. World-Herald (Omaha, Neb. 190,218
>56. Enquirer (Cincinnati) 189,084
>57. Times-Dispatch (Richmond, Va.) 187,409
>58. Democrat-Gazette (Little Rock. 185,709
>59. Tennessean (Nashville) 184,106
>60. American-Statesman (Austin) 183,288
>61. Contra Costa Times Walnut Creek, Calif. 182,196
>62. Press-Enterprise (Riverside, Calif.) 178,994
>63. Record (Bergen County, N.J.) 178,962
>64. Daily News (Los Angeles) 178,217
>65. Democrat and Chronicle Rochester, NY 172,124
>66. Asbury Park Press (Neptune, N.J.) 168,718
>67. Times-Union (Jacksonville, Fla.) 168,558
>68. Post (W. Palm Beach, Fla.) 167,531
>69. Journal (Providence, R.I.) 166,836
>70. Review-Journal (Las Vegas) 164,848
>71. News & Observer (Raleigh, N.C.) 163,460
>72. Bee (Fresno, Calif.) 158,286
>73. Post-Intelligencer (Seattle) 157,558
>74. Commercial Appeal (Memphis) 156,513
>75. Register (Des Moines, Iowa) 152,633
>76. Daily News (Philadelphia) 150,154
>77. Daily Herald (Chicago) 149,882
>78. News (Birmingham, Ala.) 145,571
>79. Advertiser (Honolulu) 143,696
>80. Blade (Toledo, Ohio) 140,628
> 81. Press (Grand Rapids, Mich.) 140,135
> 82. World (Tulsa, Okla.) 139,383
>83. Journal News (Westchester Co., N.Y.) 139,170
>84. Tribune (Salt Lake City) 134,777
>85. Beacon Journal (Akron, Ohio) 134,774
>86. Daily News (Dayton, Ohio) 128,739
>88. La Opinion (Los Angeles, Calif.) 126,189
>89. Post-Standard (Syracuse, N.Y.) 123,836
>90. Tribune-Review (Greensburg, Pa.) 119,338
>91. News Journal (Wilmington, Del.) 119,163
>92. Morning Call (Allentown, Pa.) 118,859
>93. State (Columbia, S.C.) 115,959
>94. News-Sentinel (Knoxville, Tenn.) 112,017
>95. Herald-Leader (Lexington, Ky.) 108,892
>96. Journal (Albuquerque) 108,344
>97. Herald-Tribune (Sarasota, Fla.) 106,594
>98. Telegram & Gazette Worcester, Ma 102,978
>99. Spokesman-Review(Spokane, Wash. 102,805
>100 Patriot-News (Harrisburg, Pa.) 101,598

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Reply to this Message

Dilbert Firestorm - 10 Feb 2006 02:42 GMT

hey ed..

just so as you know that Columbus was not the first to discover america.

Reply to this Message

donstockbauer@hotmail.com - 11 Feb 2006 04:39 GMT

Ed can't come to the phone right now; he's too busy wasting precious
computer memory with his postings, causing the ultimate extinction of
the human race, which he looks forward to.

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