Found out girl I'm seeing has herpes...

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Beau Randall - 20 Aug 2006 00:37 GMT

Hey Guys,

I've been dating this girl for 2 mos and it _seems_ like it will be
transitioning into relationship status very soon... she's away on
business right now and I've been stopping by her place to feed her cat.
Noticed she left a filled prescription slip for Acyclovir on her
coffee table, when I read what it was for I kinda freaked!

We've had sex on 5 occasions, all unprotected. I know, I know... but
this has so far (seemingly) has been a very loving thing and we dated
5-6 times before sleeping together. She's very relationship minded, on
the pill, etc, etc. But now not only am I worried about having
contracted something, but I'm kinda hurt she couldn't have at least
insisted we used condoms.

I can understand this virus puts people in a bit of a pickle in the
dating world. I'm flying out to see her for a few days tomorrow, and
now I feel tongue tied at the prospect of bringing this up and
insisting we used condoms.

Any advice?

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Eric - 20 Aug 2006 01:10 GMT

Beau,

Maybe you shouldn't make assumptions. Be gentle and just ask her. She
may not have genital herpes, maybe she just gets cold sores. Or perhaps
the acyclovir could even be for mono or shingles. Remember to be gentle
and supportive and be as sensitive as possible.

~Eric

> Hey Guys,
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> Any advice?

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grant - 20 Aug 2006 01:16 GMT

Hi Beau,

Wow. What a shock that must have been!

But don't panic. Acyclovir is also used to treat cold sores and shingles.
Your best bet is to tell her the truth and find out what's up. If it turns
out she has cold sores, there is a possibility she doesn't understand that
cold sores are herpes and could be passed on to you. And if she does have
genital herpes, then she has some serious explaning to do.

In the meantime, make an appointment to go to a doctor and get a herpes
blood test. Herpes tests are not included on a regular std screening, you
have to ask for it. By getting the blood test, you'll know what you have.
It's possible you already have herpes and are one of the millions who do not
ever have symptoms. But at least you'll know exactly where you stand. By
the way, it takes between 12 and 16 weeks of exposure to build up enough
antibodies to be counted accurately on a blood test. So, get tested NOW,
and if you test positive, you'll know you already had herpes.

Let us know how things are going with you.

ar

> Hey Guys,
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> Any advice?

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Beau Randall - 20 Aug 2006 02:49 GMT

Hey Guys,

Thanks for the feedback. Guess I didn't know there were distinctions
between what this drug could treat, just quickly read over the
literature (I knew next to nothing about herpes until today).

I did leave out one other thing that also had me jumping to this
conclusion - the prescription was written on a day after she refused to
sleep with me due to what she claimed was an excessively long period,
although she told me a few days before she had stopped bleeding. Her
explanation seemed really odd at the time... in this context it would
make sense.

I will ask her politely what she's using the drug for.

Thanks! - Beau

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grant - 20 Aug 2006 10:19 GMT

I still say don't jump to any conclusions. Give her an opportunity to
explain. Then you can decide what to do. It really isn't up to us to try
to figure out what was going on with her.

Good luck.
ar

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Yoshi2me - 20 Aug 2006 15:44 GMT

Ask her what her acyclovir is for and see what she says... keep in mind that
genital herpes is not the only thing people use acyclovir for.

Good luck, k?

Keep us posted on this one... I'm curious to find out how it's going to work
out.

In the meantime... you might want to think about making a date to get tested
together so you will both know what you have before you.

If the relationship is really that special then the two of you can work
through anything...

Angela :)

Signature

"By opening up to a partner and talking about an STD diagnosis you are
showing that you respect and care about yourself as well as the other
person."

Herpes Help
http://yoshi2me.com/index.html

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http://yoshi2me.com/phpbb/index.php

Herpes Blog
http://herpes-help.blogspot.com/

> Hey Guys,
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> Any advice?

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Lady - 24 Dec 2006 23:48 GMT

If you really care about her, when she comes back from her trip why not just
mention to her you saw the perscription - obviously if she left it out she
is not trying to hide something from you. For all you know she could have
had a bad cold sore, doesn't necessarily mean she has gentile herpes. And if
she does and you really care about her and love her is it the worse thing in
the world?

> Hey Guys,
>
[quoted text clipped - 3 lines]
> Noticed she left a filled prescription slip for Acyclovir on her
> coffee table, when I read what it was for I kinda freaked!

> We've had sex on 5 occasions, all unprotected. I know, I know... but
> this has so far (seemingly) has been a very loving thing and we dated
[quoted text clipped - 9 lines]
>
> Any advice?

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