John "Elmo" Wayne climbs down off his horse and lashes it to the tying
post out in front of the Pecos Saloon. He stands for a moment surveying
the sitation and notices he's being watched by several of the town folk,
being a stranger in town. Elmo spits a juicy wad of chewing tobacco
onto the dusty street, then strolls confidently up the steps and thru
the swinging doors into the bar. All eyes are on Elmo as he walks up to
the bar, six-guns at his side, and tells the bartender, "Gimme a shot of
your best interferon!" "All we got of that interferon stuff is
this
sh.t (as he sets the box up on the bar), and it only works half the
time," says the bartender. "I don't care, gimme a shot of it now
before
I blow your brains all over the mirror behind you!" Elmo snaps. The
tough looking cowboys playing poker at the nearby table all set their
cards on the table, the piano player stops playing and the harlot bar
maiden walks seductively to the bar. Everyone wants to see if Elmo can
take the shot like a man or not. They watch intently as Elmo draws up
the water and fills the powder ampule, then draws up the nasty
concoction.
The bartender steps back from the bar, sweat pouring from his brow. A
gasp, then the words "Oh my God, I think he's gonna do it!" are heard
from the far corner of the barroom. "Aint you gonna use an
alcohol
swab?" says the bartender. "Naw", Elmo replies, "Swabs are for
wimps!"
Elmo lifts his shirt, turns from the bar and stabs himself in the
beergut. As he pushes down the plunger, injecting the poison, gasps are
the only sounds in the place. Elmo turns to the bar again and disposes
of the syringe in the red medical waste container. "You
alright?" asks
the bartender. "Yep!" I reply, "How far is to Santa Fe from
here?"
A man wearing a black hat was standing at the bar says, "It's a 48 week
ride, cowboy!" "Thanks, pardner." Elmo relies. Elmo tips his hat to the
lady and strolls on out of the bar, throwing
the doors wide open on his way out. Standing at the top of the steps,
he watches as the townfolk scurry into their doors, afraid of the tall
stranger in town. A tumbleweed blows slowly down the street, the sun is
hot on Elmo's face. He unties his horse, then mounts him. As he turns
the horse westward, he gives a kick and hollers, "Giddy Up, Baby!"
//////////

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