Re: Kathy farting furiously  

Group: alt.support.hepatitis-c Date: Thu, Dec 22, 2005, 8:26pm (CST+1)
From: kjohyayhoo@nospamyahoo.com (kjoh)
Whew! Hi Thip, come on over here and sit by me and we'll just fart
quietly. Reminds me of high school. Sneaking out back for a cig.
kj
//////////
Ahhhhhhh, a pair of fragrant fuzzies, eh?
Peaches...... I love the smell of peaches in the morning.  
elmo

http://community.webtv.net/elmoemerson/DocElmosHepFile

http://community.webtv.net/elmoemerson/TheFamilyAlbum

Did you ever get caught?  The ONE time I wasn't smoking--my best friend had
just handed me her cigarette and the assisstant principal came cruising
around the corner: "Hi, Kathy!  Please come with me!"

In article
<c50ef789c41b84698ca21c1f1b901937@localhost.talkaboutsupport.com>,
kjohyayhoo@nospamyahoo.com says...

Kath, I don't fart in that type of situation.  On the contrary, blood flow moves in
the other direction.  

Thip: Do what Kathy says and listen to your IPOD.   ;}

Of course you know that Elmo's gonna want to sneak in under there with
you...

Ya know, Kathy, I think I've changed my mind about coming back in the
next life as Tonto's horse.  I want to be reborn as an elephant's colon.
It's almost hard to comprehend the mammoth farts I'd be able to blow.
Imagine holding onto one til it hurts, then unleashing a boomer loud
enough to stampede the giraffe and zebra and that's felt on the Richter
scale in Nairobi.  I'd be the most feared colon in Africa.        

Brenda Lee, eh?  <poooooot>
elmo
///////////
Oooh the tarp's a flappin' now! Ya know Shawn 'Flatulance' does have a
noble air to it :) so much more dignified and multisyllabic that the
terse little noise 'Fart.' Fart is good in a pinch, though, kind of a
quick, shot-from-the-hip noise. It's all about timing and delivery as
you know. I'm really exited about the potential for 'Flatus and
Excrement.' Amost a latin ring to it...hmmm can't do italics in here...
Flatus ecrementii...a subspecies of cannabinoid cross-pollinated by
garlic, which, when imbibed or supposited, leads to a sequence of
pooping sounds that emit in sequence as 'bud bud bud'...
I haven't spent much time in big box stores this holiday, so I missed
out on my most annoying favorite christmas song. The original, or most
abrasive version, was by Brenda Lee, I believe. Let me reintroduce it
here so you can all get it stuck in your heads:
Dingle Ball, Dingle Ball, Dingle Ball Fart Dingle Balls swing and Dingle
Balls ring Snowing, and blowing up bushels of Farts Now the Dingle Sling
has begun!
Dingle Ball, Dingle Ball, Dingle Ball Fart Dingle Balls chime in Dingle
Ball time
Dancing and farting in Dingle Ball Square In the flatulous air!
Now that's a song!
C'mon everybody!
Kathleen the Ignoble
Shawn wrote
Ya know Kathy I've grown to really like that >word!!! It has sooooo many
conversational uses. such as:
"Yes, your flatulence!"
"Right away your flatulence!"
"Do you require a tissue for that your royal >flatulence?" "By your
command, your royal flatulence" Hahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Re: Pondering 'Kathy farting furiously' (Kathy)  

Group: alt.support.hepatitis-c Date: Fri, Dec 23, 2005, 7:05pm (CST+1)
From: me@privacy.net (Thip)
<elmoemerson@webtv.net> wrote in message
news:10107-43AC8CBC-115@storefull-3252.bay.webtv.net...
Please 'clear' something up for me, Kathy. Are you an angry farter? Or
are you working hard to rip as many of the little gems as you can? I've
got a great idea on how to make some money from this fart mania thing.
It'd be a gas to be able to profit from having just plain fun. How 'bout
we manufacture and sell fart filled chocolates? We could call em
'Fromps'. Thipper (our Georgia peach) and you could provide the gas for
all the peach flavored Fromps. I'll handle the blackberry Fromp gas.
We'll market them at gas stations. Gonna need a celebrity spokesperson
for commercials.......how 'bout we get a big butted gal, maybe Oprah?
Got any ideas for a jingle?
elmo
making the best of a bad situation
/////////
We don't need Oprah. Cody can take care of that for us. Right, Cody?
//////////
Cody aint no big butted gal.  You don't like Oprah, Thipper?
elmo

http://community.webtv.net/elmoemerson/DocElmosHepFile

http://community.webtv.net/elmoemerson/TheFamilyAlbum

That's ok, Kathy.  Some of the best farts are created in anger.  Perhaps
the fart collecting machinery could be rigged sorta like Arthurs, but in
reverse.  We could compress the stuff and inject it into hollow Fromps.
I've got it all figured out.....now to get someone to build it.  Maybe
CJ could handle that.  We still need to come up with a jingle.  If this
thing works, we could all get rich and retire early.  Another thing we
could do is make Celebrity Fromps, you know, have famous people provide
the gas.  
elmo
///////////
Oh it's true Elmo. You saw through my psychobabble. I am an angry
farter. It's a deep-seated problem with me. Ahahaha! Yes, I think Fromps
could
be a viable product. Let's see...how to develop the appropriate
technology for filling the Fromps...maybe we could retrofit the device
shown in Figure 2 of the Family Album? And there will be marketing
issues. We'll need to bring in Spidey on that end...I do enjoy lounging
around all day eating Bon Bons and watching Oprah. There could be an
angle there. Perhaps a line of frozen fromps?
Oh yeah! Then I would have an outlet for the moose turd earrings I
manufacture in the shed behind the house!
Why we could be planting the seeds of an international fart Think Tank!
Or Stink Tank if you please.
Bye now. I think I'll eat a jar of sauerkraut and see what inspires me.
kj
Sauerkraut Bon Bon
Elmo farted:
by elmoemerson@webtv.net Dec 23, 2005 at 05:48 PM
Please 'clear' something up for me, Kathy. Are you an angry farter? Or
are you working hard to rip as many of the little gems as you can? I've
got a great idea on how to make some money from this fart mania thing.
It'd be a gas to be able to profit from having just plain fun. How 'bout
we manufacture and sell fart filled chocolates? We could call em
'Fromps'. Thipper (our Georgia peach) and you could provide the gas for
all the peach flavored Fromps. I'll handle the blackberry Fromp gas.
We'll market them at gas stations. Gonna need a celebrity spokesperson
for commercials.......how 'bout we get a big butted gal, maybe Oprah?
Got any ideas for a jingle?
elmo
making the best of a bad situation

http://community.webtv.net/elmoemerson/DocElmosHepFile

http://community.webtv.net/elmoemerson/TheFamilyAlbum