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Medical Forum / Diseases and Disorders / Hepatitis / April 2004Falling a part tonight
Hey everyone, Please excuse this post I just got to say this to someone who understands this. I feel like one big emotional chunk of sadness tonight and I'm falling apart in slow motion, piece by piece. I know it's just the side effects so I'm trying to just let this happen knowing that this will pass, but I have been in tears nearly all evening now for no reason what so ever. I could hardly talk to my daughter when she called tonight because of this and I think I freaked her out even after I explained to her it was just the drugs. I got this weird freakin desire to get in my car and drive or take a long walk also. I guess that's just part of the flight or fight reaction to how I'm feeling. Screw this virus, I will overcome, Julie Hang in there Julie, I know what you mean about the emotional part. I'm a big hockey fan and I can't hold back the tears during the National anthems, American or Canadian. Had tears during an "extreme makeover" show. It's the drugs killing the viruses. Have you talked to your doc about giving you any anti-depressants? I am emotional but not quite depressed but I will definitly keep that option open. You're doing it Julie. Your killing the beast. rusty > Hey everyone, > Please excuse this post I just got to say this to someone who understands [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] > Screw this virus, I will overcome, > Julie Hi Julie, I can sure relate to what you are going through. Yesterday I went over to help my Mom with her computer. (She's 75 and mainly uses it for solitaire. Can any one relate?). Anyhow, it has a problem that I couldn't fix (damn MSN upgrade that I can't finish downloading). So I'm driving home thinking about not being able to fix a relatively minor computer problem and also thinking about my redone root canal that does not seem to be getting better ...... next thing I know I have tears (major) running down my face. Wow - the sadness just rolled in. Big time. I actually drove around rather aimlessly for quite a while. Can't say that it helped .......but it seemed like a good thing to do at the time. Today I feel fine, but what a strange experience. My doctor told me that this could happen. Sure came up out of the blue though. Hang in there Julie. It won't be the last time but you WILL overcome! David (who is celebrating completing his 4th full week of tx!) samoyed@aracnet.com >Hey everyone, >Please excuse this post I just got to say this to someone who understands [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] >Screw this virus, I will overcome, >Julie Whatever you do, if you're a George Harrison fan, don't watch the part of 'Concert for George' where Ringo sings the song 'Photograph' unless you're ready to shed a few tears. :-) Elmo http://community.webtv.net/elmoemerson/DocElmosHepFile Julie, nothing to excuse, I think we have all gone through it and that's what a support group is for. Don't try driving, the tears will affect your vision and you may see a billboard that may be the saddest thing you've ever seen. :) If I tried walking, I might go too far and have a hard time making it back, my energy level is gone. You might try just going outside for a while and enjoying the night air, if you're somewhere you can. If all else fails, remember tomorrow it'll be something else, and you will overcome it as well. Just relax and this too shall pass. > Hey everyone, > Please excuse this post I just got to say this to someone who understands [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] > Screw this virus, I will overcome, > Julie  SignatureDwight Dragon Slayers' Club: http://geocities.com/dwightmspage/ On Tue, 27 Apr 2004 01:58:43 GMT, "Julie" <Julie919@earthlink.net>, in message ID <n7jjc.12365$gH6.88@newsread3.news.atl.earthlink.net>, in the newsgroup alt.support.hepatitis-c wrote: >I feel like one big emotional chunk of sadness tonight and I'm falling apart >in slow motion, piece by piece. I know it's just the side effects so I'm >trying to just let this happen knowing that this will pass, but I have been >in tears nearly all evening now for no reason what so ever. I could hardly >talk to my daughter when she called tonight because of this and I think I >freaked her out even after I explained to her it was just the drugs. Yeah, I get a weird few hours here and there too. I get them even when off tx but it's more intense on tx. My imagination has taken me to some weird places on this stuff - and it's not all been bad by any stretch :-) SignaturePaul Use the reply by email facility in your newsreader to send email If your not on anti-depressants, you should be. If you are, you may need more or a different kind. Call your doc ASAP.. this sh.t can seriously screw with your head. You have a long ways to go, treat the sides...... SignatureRuss Remove "NOSPAM" for replies. > Hey everyone, > Please excuse this post I just got to say this to someone who understands [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] > Screw this virus, I will overcome, > Julie > If your not on anti-depressants, you should be. If you are, you may need > more or a different kind. [quoted text clipped - 21 lines] > > Screw this virus, I will overcome, > > Julie Julie, I think Russ has some good advice here. Treat the sides. This is early in to treatment. You don't want it to hit you so hard. I just took my last prozac tonight. Will re-new tomorrow. I can't imagine how I would be getting along without it. Am angry about lots of stuff, some sadness, but basically just pissed off all the time. Can't imagine how I would be treating co-workers if it wasn't for the prozac. Thought about you a lot over the past few weeks Julie. Sorry I've been gone. Hugs, Susie > > If your not on anti-depressants, you should be. If you are, you may need > > more or a different kind. [quoted text clipped - 40 lines] > > Susie Hey Susie, I'm so glad your back and doing so well. We started treatment about the same time and I always look for posts from you. I took the "Ambien" the doctor gave me after posting last night and it hit me like a ton of bricks. I actually slept 6 straight hours and I sure needed it. Everything is sunny, happy, and joyful today. What a freak show these meds are. I had been taking Zoloft for the last two years after my thyroid kicked the bucket. The depression was horrible at the time, but since my meds for the thyroid straightened that out over a year ago I just kept taking it out of fear of what might happen if I didn't. Anyway, I had gotten weaned off it nearly a month prior to starting treatment and it looks like I may need to start taking it again. I'm so glad that you are here again, Kick the dragons butt, Julie =----- They insisted I take Zoloft when I started treatment last summer. Probably a good thing, I was a screaming yelling maniac at work. I had to get the crew together and fess up to what I was doing and to not take my riba rage rantings personal. It was a good move. After a couple of months of treatment the doc raised my Zoloft to 100 mg a day. I finally bagged work after 3 months on Tx. I still have my moments, but I don't have those crying fits on the side of the road anymore!!!! Ambiens work pretty good for me too, but their so damn short acting. Sometimes I'm back awake after 3-4 hours. My thyroid dried up at around 4 months Tx. It was a pretty shitty time. It took about 3 months taking synthroid before things SLOWLY started to get better. But I'll go through bouts where my thyroid (my unprofessional opinion) will go HYPER for a month period. This happened last month. I had the worst f.cking headache, it lasted 2 weeks, constant. I almost went to the hospital, but I was by myself and didn't want to drive. I misplaced my pain meds to boot and didn't find them for a week. The bright sunlight felt like ice picks in my eyeballs. I stayed indoors, curtains drawn, washcloth over my eyes to block out the light. I sure was in a pissy mood I'll tell ya!!!! I was all jittery too. And then in about 3-4 days it all clears up, light doesn't hurt my eyes. I still have minor headaches, but I can deal with that. I can sleep with out ambien too. I needed it, I was way behind on my sleep. What I want to stress here is don't let those headaches get away from you. It's the same thing every time. I have a headache, then I can't sleep, then I start getting stressed out and tension builds, making my headache worse, making more tension, till the whole thing snowballs into a sh.t storm. Then I really got to pound down the pills to get that under control. Same for the depression. Treat it and kill the dragon. The clinic where I go to has a 35% dropout rate for the peg/riba treatment. I wonder how that number could be lowered if f.cking doctors could be a little more passionate about these side affects and TREAT THEM. I think they all should get to do a couple of shots!!!! Well off to Anchorage to see the BCLD for my monthly blood donation!! SignatureRuss Remove "NOSPAM" for replies. > > > > If your not on anti-depressants, you should be. If you are, you may need [quoted text clipped - 62 lines] > > > =----- Sunny, happy, joyful. Sounds lovely. I'm at the point where I just hope not to kill anyone on a daily basis. That is verbally, mentally, spiritually. Not physically dangerous to anyone. Just pissed off. My frigging boss has yet to ask me what is going on with me. My feelings were hurt. If he finally gets around to asking me now, I'll want to tell him I don't want to discuss it now, but that I would have discussed it five weeks ago when I first offered to talk to him. Darn, I didn't get my prozac renewed today. Well, tomorrow is another day. Thursday. Thursday is a pretty good day for me, as days go, except that it is too close to Friday as I take my shot on Fridays.. Amazing what a good night sleep can do for a person. I ahven't had a good night sleep in about 7 years now. This is my major goal. To get thru treatment, get rid of the HCV and fibromyalgia and actually get a good nights sleep again. I started treatment just a few days ahead of you. It was neck and neck as to who would start first. Susie > Hey Susie, I'm so glad your back and doing so well. We started treatment > about the same time and I always look for posts from you. I took the [quoted text clipped - 13 lines] > > > =----- On Wed, 28 Apr 2004 17:59:14 +1000, "Susie Quill" <susieq@vzpacifica.net>, in message ID <408f647f_1@corp.newsgroups.com>, in the newsgroup alt.support.hepatitis-c wrote: >Sunny, happy, joyful. Sounds lovely. I'm at the point where I just hope >not to kill anyone on a daily basis. >That is verbally, mentally, spiritually. Not physically dangerous to >anyone. Just pissed off. Yeah, I know. Ouch. >My frigging boss has yet to ask me what is going on with me. My feelings >were hurt. If he finally gets around to asking me now, I'll want to tell >him I don't want to discuss it now, but that I would have discussed it five >weeks ago when I first offered to talk to him. Aah. You've got one of those too. I asked for some private time with my now ex-boss weeks before I started tx. He never came back to me. I ended up last Friday by yelling at HIS boss to stick his job up his arse LOL. I'm better off outta there. That was 16 months of getting up at 3 AM for a company that treated me like sh.t (and everyone else). I can concentrate my depleted resources now on getting myself well. Also, now that I'm working more normal hours (I have a main job too), my sleep pattern is better which has to be good for my immune system and stress levels. >Darn, I didn't get my prozac renewed today. Well, tomorrow is another day. >Thursday. Thursday is a pretty good day for me, as days go, except that it >is too close to Friday as I take my shot on Fridays.. That recognisable pattern may start disappearing over the next few weeks and mutating into something more random. I have found it so anyway and I think I've only been on this tx maybe 2 or 3 weeks longer. >Amazing what a good night sleep can do for a person. I ahven't had a good >night sleep in about 7 years now. This is my major goal. To get thru >treatment, get rid of the HCV and fibromyalgia and actually get a good >nights sleep again. You will feel a new woman Susie. Talking of feeling a new woman .................... No, I better not go there LOL. I'm glad you could make it back Susie. SignaturePaul Use the reply by email facility in your newsreader to send email Paul, that is a good call quitting a job that is stressful and non supportive. f.ck em, Like we say around here when leaving a shitty job, "I was looking for a job when I found this one." There are always other jobs to be had... But for now you guys point your energies to killing the beast. Susie, I'm glad to hear your sleeping better. SignatureRuss Remove "NOSPAM" for replies. > On Wed, 28 Apr 2004 17:59:14 +1000, "Susie Quill" > <susieq@vzpacifica.net>, in message ID [quoted text clipped - 42 lines] > > I'm glad you could make it back Susie. On Wed, 28 Apr 2004 07:36:28 -0800, "Russ" <NOSPAMsourdo55@yahoo.com>, >Paul, that is a good call quitting a job that is stressful and non >supportive. f.ck em, > >Like we say around here when leaving a shitty job, "I was looking for a job >when I found this one." There are always other jobs to be had... I could have done with you beside me at the time Russ :-) . Me on tx and Russ with a zapped out thyroid telling 'em what we think. Ha ha. That's a great image that I'll cherish. Seriously, I am losing some work from my business as well and I am happy to do so. I know I can build it up again when I'm better. Needing to fork out for that new van has thrown me a bit though. I could have done with another year out of the old one. Russ. You're a gem. Thanks for your support. SignaturePaul Use the reply by email facility in your newsreader to send email > Sunny, happy, joyful. Sounds lovely. I'm at the point where I just hope > not to kill anyone on a daily basis. Well nothing stays the same in this game of deadly drugs. lol Last night I coughed for nearly 7 hours non stop and wanted to ripout my own lungs to get some releif. I guess that says a lot about my ability to deal with anyone else also. I remembered that I had a bottle of perscription cough syrup (Tussionex #120) which has always stopped even my worst cough, put me in a zombie like state, and then to sleep for 9 or 10 hours and this stuff didnt touch the cough I had and even failed to make me feel sleepy. I ended up taking the Ambien again to finally get to sleep at 2:30 AM this morning. Its all about me NOT having any expectations about what life will be like today. Big Hugs, Julie > That is verbally, mentally, spiritually. Not physically dangerous to > anyone. Just pissed off. [quoted text clipped - 42 lines] > http://www.newsfeeds.com - The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! > -----== Over 100,000 Newsgroups - 19 Different Servers! =----- Julie, Under side effects of treatment, I read somewhere that coughing is a side. I don't remember from which med though. Be sure and tell your doc. about it. I've had a little cough, but nothing like you are talking about. If it is from the med., that is probably why your cough medicine didn't touch it. Hope you are sleeping better tonight. Susie > > Sunny, happy, joyful. Sounds lovely. I'm at the point where I just hope > > not to kill anyone on a daily basis. [quoted text clipped - 65 lines] > > http://www.newsfeeds.com - The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! > > -----== Over 100,000 Newsgroups - 19 Different Servers! =----- > Julie, > Under side effects of treatment, I read somewhere that coughing is a side. [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] > >Hey Susie, Your right about the coughing beig a side effect. It the result of the combination therpy and other than drinks lots of water to help minimize the cough the only other thing thta seems to help is heavy narcotics ((yuck!). I'm still coughing off and on, but it nothing compared to the other night. Push the sword into the dragons side and then kick it into the hilt. Julie Julie> > > > Sunny, happy, joyful. Sounds lovely. I'm at the point where I just > hope [quoted text clipped - 83 lines] > http://www.newsfeeds.com - The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! > -----== Over 100,000 Newsgroups - 19 Different Servers! =----- I've had a mild cough most of the time on this. Some flem, though clear. As I take narcotics PCR (when needed) for headaches, I have to be carefull to remember to cough. Those drugs slow your breathing down and the ability to cough up flem, your lungs can fill up. I've been making it a practice to cough up what i can in the morning. They told me as long as I'm not hauking up green chunks it's ok. SignatureRuss Remove "NOSPAM" for replies. > > > Julie, [quoted text clipped - 111 lines] > > http://www.newsfeeds.com - The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! > > -----== Over 100,000 Newsgroups - 19 Different Servers! =----- Falling a part tonight Group: alt.support.hepatitis-c Date: Tue, Apr 27, 2004, 1:58am (EDT+4) From: Julie919@earthlink.net (Julie) Hey everyone, Please excuse this post I just got to say this to someone who understands this. I feel like one big emotional chunk of sadness tonight and I'm falling apart in slow motion, piece by piece. I know it's just the side effects so I'm trying to just let this happen knowing that this will pass, but I have been in tears nearly all evening now for no reason what so ever. I could hardly talk to my daughter when she called tonight because of this and I think I freaked her out even after I explained to her it was just the drugs. I got this weird freakin desire to get in my car and drive or take a long walk also. I guess that's just part of the flight or fight reaction to how I'm feeling. Screw this virus, I will overcome, Julie /////////////// Julie, I understand exactly where you're coming from and how you feel. Please call your doctor and tell him not only about your deep sadness, but also your desire to get away from it all. You are either not taking anti-d's, not taking enough of them, or you're taking the wrong one. You don't have to experience that deep sadness if you get the right amount of the correct anti-d. DON"T WAIT to call your doc. Do it NOW!! Elmo http://community.webtv.net/elmoemerson/DocElmosHepFile Hey Julie, It is the meds, just keep remembering that. Call your doc and tell him what is going on. I did the same thing when I first started tx. I got my doctors appointments confused. I went to his office and set there for one hour before I asked what was taking so long. They told me I didn't have an appointment that day. Well that was the final straw, I left out of the office trying not to let them see me crying. The nurse told me they could squeeze me in but I just wanted to get out of there, so I left. Well then I had the office and my family looking for me. They thought I had gone somewhere and killed my self. After that little escapade, he upped my Zoloft and it's a lot better. Feel better soon Julie! hc > Hey everyone, > Please excuse this post I just got to say this to someone who understands [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] > Screw this virus, I will overcome, > Julie Hey Julie, I've been on zoloft for some time. My doc finally took me off it and put me clonazapan and metaprolol. I noticed immediate relief. I still have those crying jags but they are much reduced and only happen when very tired. Talk to you docs and see what they think. Good luck, you'll make it through!!! SignatureRegards, Shawn . > Hey everyone, > Please excuse this post I just got to say this to someone who understands [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] > Screw this virus, I will overcome, > Julie Julie, I sure hope you are taking the messages to heart from these wise folks and call your doc. There is no way I could have made it through tx without anti d's (I took celexa). I also took medicine for my nausea, headaches, joint pain, insomnia and anxiety. Was I walking drugstore? You bet. I finally gave in to treating my symptoms when I showed up at my doctors office TWICE with two very different shoes on.... My doctor (GP), who is probably one of the most compassionate people I know, convinced me that in order to make it through tx I needed temporary assistance. I've read a couple of posts from folks that don't need medical assistance with their symptoms. I say "good for them" but I am convinced that they are the lucky few. CALL YOUR DOC, OK??? Don't allow yourself to be any more miserable than you have to be. Your pounding the dragon with heavy artillery. You need to keep a strong defense because you need to win each battle to win the war. jim > Julie, > [quoted text clipped - 13 lines] > > jim Your right Jim and I appreciate your concern and the experience you have shared. Keeping that strong defense and not having to build one during a disaster is the only way to get through this. I see my doctor on Thursday and I will be sure to tell him what's going on. God bless you and all the others who have responded, Julie > Hey Julie, I've been on zoloft for some time. My doc finally > took me off it and put me clonazapan and metaprolol. I [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] > Regards, > Shawn Thanks Shawn, I guess I was just liking the idea of NOT having to take another pill that's all. I see my doctor Thursday and I will tell him how things are going. thanks again, Julie > . > > Hey everyone, [quoted text clipped - 20 lines] > > Screw this virus, I will overcome, > > Julie |
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