Some of you know that my foster mother was diagnosed with type 2 and
then with breast cancer.  She never posted here.  Though I did set her
machine up so she could if she ever chose to.  She did however read
here.  

My thanks to Quentin, Jennifer, Susan, Kate, Julie, Colleen, Alan S.,
Jenny, Will, Pete, Chuck, Diana, Madison, RK, Exfat, Gys De Jongh and
many others.  Some of you didn't post much but you all were talked
about and prayed for a great deal.

At first Mom didn't want to read the group.  But after she learned how
to use the kill file feature of agent she was able to enjoy her time
reading in private.

When she found out about the type 2 she had the typical experience
with poor medical advice that many here got when first diagnosed
before coming here.  Her doctors, provided at that time through the
military as a widow of a veteran, simply told her to take 1 Avandia
per day and to stay away from sugar.  Guess who went through the roof
and called the other kids and got mom to see better doctors.

With the new doctors and with the low carb advice from the newsgroup,
and Jennifer's advice to newbies, mom was able to get her A1c into the
5% range several times.  Later when she had to go on steroids during
the cancer treatments she could no longer maintain that level of
control.  But she was able to keep it in the upper 6s and lower 7s.

When she found the lump in her breast she was reluctant at first to
see the doctor about it but went that week after I reminded her of my
birth mothers mistakes and refusal to see a doctor when she found her
first lump.  Mom was quickly diagnosed and scheduled for a lumpectomy
and matching reduction for the right breast.  She had the procedure,
went through the radiation and chemo.  And never had cancer return to
the breasts.

However, she did later exhibit signs of a stroke and was at first
misdiagnosed as having had a mild one.  Then after a weekend of
testing she was found to have developed a tumor in the brain that was
putting pressure on the brain and mimicking the symptoms of a stroke.
That's when she was started on radiation and steroids to reduce and
hopefully get rid of the tumor.  And thankfully that particular tumor
was eradicated.  And for a few months she was improving.  

The cancer however was not completely eliminated from the body and did
spread again.  When the doctors detected it again it had spread to the
liver, other organs, bones and had formed 3 small tumors at the back
and left side of her skull.

At this point she was getting around with the help of a walker for
short distances and a wheel chair for extended trips.  The last 2
weeks of October she could no longer get out of her chair or bed
without help but could still walk.  Towards the end of the last week
of Oct. she would fall if she walked to far without someone holding
her.  I missed catching her once and she scraped her arm and just
barely missed catching her a second time.  Twice I came over to her
house to find her on the floor unable to get up.  During this time we
were trying to get home nursing but her benefits had been exhausted
for that and they said she qualified for hospice.  Hospice said they
couldn't help until all three of her doctors signed off on their
paperwork.  We had to drop one of her doctors and get a new one
because he refused to do what the hospice people were asking.  Which
was basically state that mom was terminal and that treatment was only
to make her comfortable at this point.  The guy turned out to be some
Christian nut extremist similar to chung.  And we weren't the first to
have this problem with him.

Once we got the paper work cleared, hospice stepped in and was there
with us every day from 6 am until late at night, no matter how many
family and friends were in the house to help out.  On Nov. 6th mom
refused to get out of bed.  Hospice brought in a hospital bed with an
air mattress and set it up in the living room and then moved mom for
us.  We called everyone we knew, friends, family, everyone in her
phonebook still alive and told them if they wanted to say goodbye by
phone or in person they needed to do so as soon as possible.

During this time, the daughter that was living with her was fighting
to keep her job and was getting the run around about getting FMLA time
off.  When she finally had enough of the crap and threatened to quit
and we both spoke with her manager's boss she was given the time off
she needed to be with mom.  The daughter in Louisiana took her kids
out of school and hopped in the car and drove up but didn't leave
until the 8th and didn't arrive until the 10th at 3 PM.  The 3rd
daughter was coming over for several hours every day.  On Wednesday
the 8th mom was no longer able to talk but was still alert and
responding.  Thursday she could only stay awake for short periods of
time.  Friday shortly before the one daughter arrived at 3 mom would
no longer wake up.  

I was still scheduled to work Friday night and the hospice nurse said
that mom would probably remain this way throughout the night and
Saturday.  That there was no need for me to stay.  So I kissed her
good night and told her I would see her first thing in the morning
when I got off work.  I went home to shower and change into my
uniform.  When I stepped out of the shower the phone rang and my
sister, the one living with mom, was on saying that mom had stopped
breathing and that I had to come back.  She passed at 6 PM.  I called
work and told them what had happened and the assistant manager came in
and worked my shift that night and someone else worked it Saturday
night.

Mom's funeral was the following Friday on Nov. 17.  She was laid to
rest next to her husband, a man I never had the honor of meeting, in
the veteran's section of the cemetery.

My birth mother died of cancer shortly after Thanksgiving. She was
alone on the floor of her hospital room when she was found by the
nurse.  My foster mom died just before thanksgiving.  Her last wish,
was that all of her children would be with her one last time.  She had
all of her children, foster children, grandchildren, and great
grandchildren with her that day.  She died in the same home she raised
her family.  Karma.

scroll past my signature and read the note: