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Medical Forum / General / Cardiology / April 2008The Chicken, Egg and God - Journal of Belief and Poultry
It has been found that God is a big celestial Chicken as published in the Journal of Belief and Poultry One day God, the Big Chicken, laid a celestial egg and put it in the microwave and when the egg exploded there was a Big Bang and pieces of the egg when flying out all over the Universe and eventually formed galaxies, stars, planets like Earth. Since Earth was the most beautiful of all the planets, that is where God created Adam and then Eve and then Adams sperm and Eve's EGGS (there are the eggs again) created children and eventually grandchildren and beyond. The yolk of an egg is yellow, the same color as the sun - certainly not a coincidence but by design Look at pictures of Colonel Sanders - an older man in a White suit with a White Beard - coincidence or providence. Chickens like man, and unlike many other animals, walk on two feet -coincidence or design? There is an old saying: chickens come home to roost - coincidence that it refers to chicken or providence Finally if you are still not convinced and do not believe this, then why are there Easter Eggs at Easter one of the most important Christian Holidays. > It has been found that God is a big celestial Chicken as published in > the Journal of Belief and Poultry Still trying to cover up your ignorance? You surely believe in time, don't you? Do you have any idea how to prove that time exists? Or is it just your blind belief that time exists?  Signaturemonkfish > > It has been found that God is a big celestial Chicken as published in > > the Journal of Belief and Poultry [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > Do you have any idea how to prove that time exists? > Or is it just your blind belief that time exists? Time is a simple concept, really. Time is what makes it difficult to travel back and abort you. >> > It has been found that God is a big celestial Chicken as published in >> > the Journal of Belief and Poultry [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] > Time is a simple concept, really. Time is what makes it difficult to > travel back and abort you. Is that so? How are you going to prove that time exists? If you cannot even do that what makes you think you can prove the existence of the ultimate point of reference? Signaturemonkfish > >> > It has been found that God is a big celestial Chicken as published in > >> > the Journal of Belief and Poultry [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] > Is that so? > How are you going to prove that time exists? Calendars? > If you cannot even do that > what makes you think you can prove the existence > of the ultimate point of reference? There is no point of reference in a universe with no center. > There is no point of reference in a universe with no center. Not for thoes who view the Earth as the center of the Universe where the Sun, the galaxy and everything else revolves around the Earth. Why would a God, who created EVERYTHING, who created man in His image, put man on some remote planet in the outskirts of a galazy and not be at the center? Maybe man is not that important after all in that God's design. Maybe there is another key "man" at the center. Maybe that God does not exist. Maybe that is the will of that God. Maybe it is no more than a maybe. http://HeartMDPhD.com/Insanesatan > Maybe it is no more than a maybe. Maybe Mayberry RFD is the point of reference and maybe God is really Sheriff Taylor, Barney Fife is the Holy Spirit and Opie is Jesus http://HeartMDPhD.com/Imbecilesatan > > Maybe it is no more than a maybe. > > Maybe Mayberry RFD is the point of reference and maybe God is really Sheriff > Taylor, Barney Fife is the Holy Spirit and Opie is Jesus Maybe it wasn't an apple that Adam and Eve ate, but a slice of Aunt Bea's apple pie. >>> Maybe it is no more than a maybe. >> [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] > Maybe it wasn't an apple that Adam and Eve ate, but > a slice of Aunt Bea's apple pie. Could Aunt Bea have been the second coming of Jesus in drag? She was a nicest, decent, caring, and honest person as there ever was. > On Mon, 14 Apr 2008 16:18:13 -0500, Father Haskell wrote > (in message [quoted text clipped - 11 lines] > Could Aunt Bea have been the second coming of Jesus in drag? She was a > nicest, decent, caring, and honest person as there ever was. Shame they had to crucify her in the final episode. On Mon, 14 Apr 2008 16:33:26 -0500, Father Haskell wrote >> Could Aunt Bea have been the second coming of Jesus in drag? She was a >> nicest, decent, caring, and honest person as there ever was. > > Shame they had to crucify her in the final episode. Classic example of George Santayana's quote "Those who cannot learn from history are doomed to repeat it." Hopefully mankind wll learn the third time. > On Mon, 14 Apr 2008 16:33:26 -0500, Father Haskell wrote > [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] > > Hopefully mankind wll learn the third time. It's not good for your mental health to laugh at people you presume to be mentally ill. If you don't realize this, you might be one of them already. Signaturemonkfish > > On Mon, 14 Apr 2008 16:33:26 -0500, Father Haskell wrote > [quoted text clipped - 13 lines] > If you don't realize this, > you might be one of them already. Failure to laugh is a symptom of mental illness. >> > On Mon, 14 Apr 2008 16:33:26 -0500, Father Haskell wrote >> [quoted text clipped - 15 lines] > > Failure to laugh is a symptom of mental illness. You can learn to laugh at yourself. Signaturemonkfish >>> > On Mon, 14 Apr 2008 16:33:26 -0500, Father Haskell wrote >>> [quoted text clipped - 17 lines] > > You can learn to laugh at yourself. I imagine you've mastered that art Fish. http://HeartMDPhD.com/Worthlesssatan > Failure to laugh is a symptom of mental illness. Some people like Chung and his fish friend, seem to slip on a mental banana peel > On Mon, 14 Apr 2008 17:15:21 -0500, Father Haskell wrote > (in message [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] > Some people like Chung and his fish friend, seem to slip on a mental banana > peel Except with them it's a pile of dogshit. >> On Mon, 14 Apr 2008 17:15:21 -0500, Father Haskell wrote >> (in message [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > > Except with them it's a pile of dogshit. Or chicken sh.t from the Celestial Chicken > On Mon, 14 Apr 2008 17:30:38 -0500, Father Haskell wrote > (in message [quoted text clipped - 12 lines] > > Or chicken sh.t from the Celestial Chicken Behold, a young person taken up by the Celestial Chicken: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XVReD9WNs_A > Behold, a young person taken up by the Celestial > Chicken: > > http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XVReD9WNs_A Yes it is. It should be a warning to all who do not believe in the Celestial Chicken and especially those who speak out against or mock the Celestial Chicken as you will end up with EGG all over your face and COOPed in Hell with the Hades Fox who controls those COOPed up. > On Mon, 14 Apr 2008 16:33:26 -0500, Father Haskell wrote > [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] > > Hopefully mankind wll learn the third time. Actually, since jesus wasn't the first, Aunt Bea would be at *least* the third. >> There is no point of reference in a universe with no center. > [quoted text clipped - 9 lines] > exist. Maybe that is the will of that God. Maybe it is no more than a > maybe. Maybe you are an illusion. You just think you exist but you are just a bunch of quantums particles whirling in the mostly empty space. Do they actually whirl or just blink? Signaturemonkfish >> >> > It has been found that God is a big celestial Chicken as published >> >> > in the Journal of Belief and Poultry [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] > > Calendars? Have you seen any churches? >> If you cannot even do that >> what makes you think you can prove the existence of the ultimate point >> of reference? > > There is no point of reference in a universe with no center. Without the ultimate point of reference, you would not even know that the universe has no center. What makes you think the universe has to have a center? Does the ocean have a center? Signaturemonkfish > Time is a simple concept, really. Time is what > makes it difficult to travel back and abort you. Time is the fourth dimension. Of course in the universe there could be even more dimensions that we cannot even imagine. >> Time is a simple concept, really. Time is what makes it difficult to >> travel back and abort you. > > Time is the fourth dimension. Of course in the universe there could be > even more dimensions that we cannot even imagine. Wonderful. Ever heard of the spiritual dimension? We cannot even prove that it exists within the four dimensions. But there are rumors about it. There are rumors about the big bang. Do you know what it means mathematically or just know what they say about it figuratively? Signaturemonkfish > >> Time is a simple concept, really. Time is what makes it difficult to > >> travel back and abort you. [quoted text clipped - 7 lines] > within the four dimensions. > But there are rumors about it. Then it doesn't exist, and rumors remain nothing more than rumors. >> >> Time is a simple concept, really. Time is what makes it difficult >> >> to travel back and abort you. [quoted text clipped - 9 lines] > > Then it doesn't exist, and rumors remain nothing more than rumors. There are rumors about the big bang. Some people say they understand it mathmatically. Are you one of them? If not, you are just believing some rumors. Some people said they saw the resurrected Jesus and died for that belief. We all know scientists change their minds a lot. Who are you going to trust? Actually the better question is why are we going to believe? Do you wanna make more hydrogen bombs or live a life of vigor and charity? Signaturemonkfish > >> >> Time is a simple concept, really. Time is what makes it difficult > >> >> to travel back and abort you. [quoted text clipped - 24 lines] > Do you wanna make more hydrogen bombs > or live a life of vigor and charity? Teller-Ulam devices are _so_ 1950. I prefer matter-antimatter annhilation or solarmite. >> >> > On Mon, 14 Apr 2008 0:42:28 -0500, Father Haskell wrote (in >> >> > message <44e9f24f-166a-4286-9467-868c0ccb2...@m36g2000hse.googlegroups.com>): >> >> >> Time is a simple concept, really. Time is what makes it >> >> >> difficult to travel back and abort you. [quoted text clipped - 26 lines] > Teller-Ulam devices are _so_ 1950. I prefer matter-antimatter > annhilation or solarmite. Anything but "love your neighbor"? Signaturemonkfish >>> >> Time is a simple concept, really. Time is what makes it difficult >>> >> to travel back and abort you. [quoted text clipped - 24 lines] > Do you wanna make more hydrogen bombs > or live a life of vigor and charity? Re: "Do you have any idea how to prove that time exists?" The better question has more to do with 'the general population, Food and Water and Salt all play a part The Freedom of The Son Of Man Will Vote In This Assembly/Election Be Brave It has come into our time > On Mon, 14 Apr 2008 0:42:28 -0500, Father Haskell wrote > (in message [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] > Time is the fourth dimension. Of course in the universe there could be even > more dimensions that we cannot even imagine. Time is a coordinate like any other, and as necessary to define an object's location as the other three spatial dimensions. As many as 12 additional, possible dimensions have been postulated. We do not experience these as they remained closed after the big bang. >> > Time is a simple concept, really. Time is what makes it difficult to >> > travel back and abort you. [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > additional, possible dimensions have been postulated. We do not > experience these as they remained closed after the big bang. Does that mean you understand the big bang meathmatically? Or you just think you know what it is because you heard some intelligent people talk about it figuratively for the gullible? Signaturemonkfish On Mon, 14 Apr 2008 16:15:58 -0500, Father Haskell wrote (in message <1d02b993-c921-4665-aff7-4e9540baf178@u69g2000hse.googlegroups.com>): > Time is a coordinate like any other, and as necessary to > define an object's location as the other three spatial dimensions. > As many as 12 additional, possible dimensions have been > postulated. We do not experience these as they remained > closed after the big bang. Have you noticed how gillable some fish are in that they will believe anything, no matter how fishy it is and the fish with the biggest mouth are often the fishiest. > On Mon, 14 Apr 2008 16:15:58 -0500, Father Haskell wrote (in message > <1d02b993-c921-4665-aff7-4e9540baf178@u69g2000hse.googlegroups.com>): [quoted text clipped - 7 lines] > anything, no matter how fishy it is and the fish with the biggest mouth > are often the fishiest. If you cannot even prove that time exists, what makes you think you can manage to prove that God exists? Let me make it easier for you. If you prove that love exists, I will prove that God exists. Signaturemonkfish > On Mon, 14 Apr 2008 16:15:58 -0500, Father Haskell wrote > (in message [quoted text clipped - 9 lines] > anything, no matter how fishy it is and the fish with the biggest mouth are > often the fishiest. Xianity has all the markings of a bad practical joke. > Xianity has all the markings of a bad practical joke. Maybe God is really the Joker. >> Xianity has all the markings of a bad practical joke. > >Maybe God is really the Joker. --- The smoker, the midnight toker? JF >> On Mon, 14 Apr 2008 16:15:58 -0500, Father Haskell wrote (in message >> <1d02b993-c921-4665-aff7-4e9540baf...@u69g2000hse.googlegroups.com>): [quoted text clipped - 9 lines] > > Xianity has all the markings of a bad practical joke. You should see what scientists believe nowadays. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quantum_teleportation Signaturemonkfish > >> On Mon, 14 Apr 2008 16:15:58 -0500, Father Haskell wrote (in message > >> <1d02b993-c921-4665-aff7-4e9540baf...@u69g2000hse.googlegroups.com>): [quoted text clipped - 13 lines] > > http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quantum_teleportation Prove they're wrong. >> On Mon, 14 Apr 2008 16:15:58 -0500, Father Haskell wrote >> (in message [quoted text clipped - 11 lines] > >Xianity has all the markings of a bad practical joke. --- Well, there is this joke in Texas: Q. "Do you know why the three wise men smelled like smoke?" A. "Because they came from a far." :-) JF >On Mon, 14 Apr 2008 16:15:58 -0500, Father Haskell wrote >(in message [quoted text clipped - 9 lines] >anything, no matter how fishy it is and the fish with the biggest mouth are >often the fishiest. --- Did you know that "gullible" isn't in the dictionary? JF > Did you know that "gullible" isn't in the dictionary? > > JF Sorry, not that gullible http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/gullible > >> > Time is a simple concept, really. Time is what makes it difficult to > >> > travel back and abort you. [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] > > Does that mean you understand the big bang meathmatically? T = 0 > Or you just think you know what it is > because you heard some intelligent people > talk about it figuratively for the gullible? That would be how religions start. >> >> On Mon, 14 Apr 2008 0:42:28 -0500, Father Haskell wrote (in message <44e9f24f-166a-4286-9467-868c0ccb2...@m36g2000hse.googlegroups.com>): >> >> > Time is a simple concept, really. Time is what makes it difficult >> >> > to travel back and abort you. [quoted text clipped - 15 lines] > > That would be how religions start. That's what your blind faith is all about. You think that the scientific method can solve all matters of truth; but you don't realize that it is helpless to solve any ethical problems. Ask the scientific method whether life is good. Signaturemonkfish > >> >> On Mon, 14 Apr 2008 0:42:28 -0500, Father Haskell wrote (in message > [quoted text clipped - 23 lines] > You think that the scientific method can > solve all matters of truth; There's no alternative. > but you don't realize that it is helpless > to solve any ethical problems. And religions are. Go spend a month in a country living under sharia law and tell us how you feel. > Ask the scientific method whether life is good. For 4/5 of the human race, it pretty much sucks. Animals and plants have it worse. Animals running free invariably die violent and protracted deaths. If you're a plant, you get ripped up by the roots and eaten -- prove they don't shriek just because you can't hear them shriek. Some bastard god you got there. >> Does that mean you understand the big bang meathmatically? > [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] > > That would be how religions start. Well mankind started with some guy banging up some gal and then a whole lot of begetting got even more guys to bang up more gals. It does seem that God banged up Mary and got Jesus. >>> Does that mean you understand the big bang meathmatically? >> [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] > >It does seem that God banged up Mary and got Jesus. --- Starman? JF >> > It has been found that God is a big celestial Chicken as published in >> > the Journal of Belief and Poultry [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > Time is a simple concept, really. Time is what > makes it difficult to travel back and abort you. Yep, even a simple (loud) knock on the window at the right time could prevent a cetain individual from being born. Although a brick through the window (making sure no one is injured in the process) may be more affective. > >> > It has been found that God is a big celestial Chicken as published in > >> > the Journal of Belief and Poultry [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] > prevent a cetain individual from being born. Although a brick through the > window (making sure no one is injured in the process) may be more affective. I prefer chaining all of the doors and setting the house on fire. >> >> > It has been found that God is a big celestial Chicken as published >> >> > in [quoted text clipped - 16 lines] > I prefer chaining all of the doors and setting the house > on fire. You could use a giant semi to drag it away right before the party concerned is ready to take their clothes off and produce the unwanted individual. Of course, you'd have to have a time and date but this is a decent time machine here, not one from the Home Depot dumpster. > >> "Father Haskell" <fatherhask...@yahoo.com> wrote in message > [quoted text clipped - 25 lines] > course, you'd have to have a time and date but this is a decent time machine > here, not one from the Home Depot dumpster. Just say you're from 40 years in the future. Tell them about a new thing soon to hit called the "Internet" and show them printouts of Andy's 2PD gibberish. >>> "Father Haskell" <fatherhask...@yahoo.com> wrote in message news:44e9f24f-166a-4286-9467-868c0ccb22f0@m36g2000hse.googlegroups.com... >>> >> > It has been found that God is a big celestial Chicken as >>> >> > published in [quoted text clipped - 19 lines] > individual. Of course, you'd have to have a time and date but this is a > decent time machine here, not one from the Home Depot dumpster. Should you be presumed to be mentally ill too? Signaturemonkfish >> "Father Haskell" <fatherhask...@yahoo.com> wrote in message news:44e9f24f-166a-4286-9467-868c0ccb22f0@m36g2000hse.googlegroups.com... >> >> > It has been found that God is a big celestial Chicken as published >> >> > in the Journal of Belief and Poultry [quoted text clipped - 12 lines] > > I prefer chaining all of the doors and setting the house on fire. Have you ever been raped? Signaturemonkfish >>> "Father Haskell" <fatherhask...@yahoo.com> wrote in message >>> [quoted text clipped - 18 lines] > > Have you ever been raped? I think Monkfish has been to the joint or some criminal mental hosptial, he's asking questions that an institutionalized person would ask. Or is this a feitsh you need to explore (poor FH!) >>>> "Father Haskell" <fatherhask...@yahoo.com> wrote in message news:44e9f24f-166a-4286-9467-868c0ccb22f0@m36g2000hse.googlegroups.com... >>>> >> > It has been found that God is a big celestial Chicken as >>>> >> > published in the Journal of Belief and Poultry [quoted text clipped - 18 lines] > he's asking questions that an institutionalized person would ask. Or is > this a feitsh you need to explore (poor FH!) Have you ever loved anyone? Signaturemonkfish > I think Monkfish has been to the joint or some criminal mental hosptial, > he's asking questions that an institutionalized person would ask. Or is > this a feitsh you need to explore (poor FH!) Or he is like the little kid who keep asking why why why hoping his mother will give him a cookie to go away. >> I think Monkfish has been to the joint or some criminal mental hosptial, >> he's asking questions that an institutionalized person would ask. Or is >> this a feitsh you need to explore (poor FH!) > > Or he is like the little kid who keep asking why why why hoping his mother > will give him a cookie to go away. Yeah, could be. I'm sure he lives with his mother as no other woman would have him. > Yeah, could be. I'm sure he lives with his mother as no other woman would > have him. Are you talking about Jesus? >> Yeah, could be. I'm sure he lives with his mother as no other woman >> would >> have him. > > Are you talking about Jesus? Nah, Fishdick. Do you have any cookies? >> It has been found that God is a big celestial Chicken as published in >> the Journal of Belief and Poultry [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] >Do you have any idea how to prove that time exists? >Or is it just your blind belief that time exists? --- How about: "If time _didn't_ exist then everything would already have happened." JF >>> It has been found that God is a big celestial Chicken as published in >>> the Journal of Belief and Poultry [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] > > JF Time exists because all changes take time. Signaturemonkfish > How about: "If time _didn't_ exist then everything would already have > happened." > > JF Or never have happened and we would not be here. Of course we know from Einstein that time does go slower, the faster you go. And in a fantasy world, time can do whatever the fantasy believer wants. > > It has been found that God is a big celestial Chicken as published in > > the Journal of Belief and Poultry [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > Do you have any idea how to prove that time exists? > Or is it just your blind belief that time exists? I will explain it to you tomorrow > -- > monkfish http://HeartMDPhD.com/Worthlesssatan |
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