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Medical Forum / Diseases and Disorders / Prostate Cancer / August 2007Countering depression?
What do you guys do? When I felt BAAAD I could play the organ or go fishing, which always cheered me up and gave me so much pleasure. With drugs that cause so much trembling (Morphine in particular) I can no longer play keyboard very well for hitting bum notes. My hips are so sore, I can't sit for too long at the organ. Fishing - I need someone with me to tie lines or I end up getting hooked myself and doing damage, both of these newer failings demoralise me to an unbelievable level. A recent dissapointment regarding my Son adds to my discontent. The weepy sessions have become more frequent. I detest this weakness in me. So - that's my two main natural anti-depressants out the window. I spend a lot of time in Prayer and meditation, sometimes fasting a day or two to empasise to my Lord that HE is more important to me than food. THAT does help - sometimes. I belong to a chat group in Arizona where we talk every Saturday night - lots of UK guys too, and just talking with someone who stays 500 miles away - you feel "Close" and not so isolated. My good friend Steve Jordan put me in touch with them - you don't have to be from Arizona. Look for Steve's email from his messages if you want to know more. Contact him direct, or to Ralphie V - who posts here at times. I'm surprised that Steve K and IP have not taken advantage of that forum! You guys with wives or who are in relationships that really mean something have a great advantage over us singles. If you have a REAL life-Partner who IS a true friend - you f.cks are MILES ahead in the survival stakes. I am jealous for my inability to compromise and hold a female close to me. There's just SO much sh.t pouring down and for some reason I'm it's target (I said this to my friend Leah but so far she hasn't replied to that) WHO the f.ck did I offend so much in a previous life? Or, like JOB, is my Lord just testing me to see how far I will go before denying Him? ( I NEVER will - HE is my reason for living and my King the Lord Christ - my REDEMPTION) Or am I just my usual feeling sorry for myself? Jesus, My King, He knows I wasn't like this a year ago. Or am I just starting - no - I'm a LONG way into this - to be Paranoid? WHAT do you guys do? Interested to know. HUGHIE. (Very mixed up right now) - oh - and sober - in case Alex wants to interject. (Sorry Alex - couldn't help that) > What do you guys do? > [quoted text clipped - 44 lines] > interject. > (Sorry Alex - couldn't help that) Well HUGHIE, I take anti-depressant drugs which turned me around in a matter of 2 weeks. My laymans understanding is that certain chemical reactions in the brain can be dealt with via drugs. In my case it took the edge off and I started looking at things without such an urgent 'gotta do something' attitude. Rich > What do you guys do? ... Well, I'll tell you a little story about something that cheered me up. It's a story about life and music, two things that I know you're interested in. I read some time ago that way more than 99% of the DNA of all people is the same. The reason is that we are all, in fact, related. In a very literal and true sense, we are all cousins. It's not just that you and I, Hughie, are cousins, but Mozart and Bach and everyone on this newsgroup and everyone else that we might admire are our cousins too. One night I went to a symphony concert. There on the stage were about 90 of our cousins playing the instruments. Some of them were my age, but there were also younger ones that I knew would still be playing after I was gone, and would be replaced by others who would play after they went. They were playing a symphony by our cousin Antonin Dvorak. It was magnificent. I listened to them play and I thought, they are representing me on that stage. They're playing for me. And they're terrific. I love them all. It seems to me that we are part of a larger human enterprise. We play a very small part in that enterprise. A few of our especially talented cousins like Mozart and Dvorak play a larger part, but we all do what we can. We are all part and parcel of the enterprise. It is that large stream of life that gives us our individual bits of life and that makes our lives worthwhile. And that stream will continue to flow and flow long after we are gone. We'll get up from our chairs and hand our instruments to our younger cousins, just as Wolfgang and Antonin and all our older cousins handed them down to us. They will pick them up and play for us. They will keep our music alive and keep the faith for us. Go to a concert and watch the young people play. When that becomes too difficult, then turn on the radio and listen. And when that's over, you might call up the video store and watch our dear departed cousins, Groucho, Chico and Harpo Marx show us what fun our cousins were having before we were born. Alan On August 17, Alan Meyer replied to Hugh: > Well, I'll tell you a little story about something that cheered > me up. It's a story about life and music, two things that I know > you're interested in. (snip) Alan covered it well. I wish I had said that. Regards, Steve J "Never -- never -- never give up! Never go gently. There will be plenty of gentle after we die, so until then, fight! Control the rhythms and tempo of the dance, even when you have to let the PCa dancing bear lead for awhile -- even when you have to wear the lead suit as you dance -- never let the bear set the rhythm and tempo of your dance with life -- when the bear finally takes control, it will be a very hollow feeling for him, because I will be gone -- dancing in a better place." --E. B. (Burns) Mixon, PCa survivor, June 14, 2005 on The Prostate Problems Mailing List Thank you, Burns. Live long and prosper. >> What do you guys do? >... > >Well, I'll tell you a little story about something that cheered >me up. It's a story about life and music, two things that I know >you're interested in. snip.... > Alan Hi Alan! Great story. Nicely put. I read it on Friday and still had it on my mind today. And came back to read it again. Thank you. Best wishes. Just  SignaturePosted via a free Usenet account from http://www.teranews.com "Shug" wrote: > What do you guys do? I like the bio of Norman Cousins, a big-wig publisher or editor (New Yorker???). It was a made-for-TV movie aired by CBS circa 1984. I was very lucky to have had the foresight to record it at the time and have shown it at support groups in my area. He converted a room in his mansion into a mini-theater and bought every available cartoon and comedy movie he could lay his hands on -- Wily Coyote, Amos and Andy, Little Rascals, Chip and Dale, Laurel and Hardy, Abbott and Costello, etc. etc. etc. etc. He went into that room and spent hours viewing those movies. Family members often stood outside the locked door listening to and worrying about his "rolling-on-the-floor" belly laughter. Robin Williams often injects humor into his movies as a way to cure problems/illnesses. And I've become a firm believer that humor is a better way to handle a problem than wallowing in self-pity. > What do you guys do? > [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] > A recent dissapointment regarding my Son adds to my discontent. > The weepy sessions have become more frequent. I detest this weakness in me. Hips paining? Or soreness from the RT? The former should start improving soon. The latter, have to ask the radiation oncologist. Some people use udder balm, but I'm not sure it's allowed in between sessions. Hang in there, Hugh. Hopefully the more RT they do, to various places, the sooner you can cut back on the morphine and be back to your fishing and organ playing. J I'm sorry you're suffering so much Shug. I,too take 2 anti-depressants, anxiety medication, diabetes meds...and a variety of others. I have therapy each week where I talk to someone in psychology. Maybe you could talk to a cleryman...and the previous comment about brain chemicals is correct. Medicine can help how you feel. As a former druggist...I KNOW this is true. Think about it. My very best to you, Ron B. Chicago > What do you guys do? I walk, Hugh. But, you do, too, when you're delivering papers. If I can't walk, I take solace in the computer. I usually have some sort of project to do, a spreadsheet to build, PowerPoint to create, etc. But, it's usually for my job or for some volunteer work I do. Barring that, I have a 17' x 17' workroom (I guess that's little more than 4 meters x 4 meters to you). And, if I'm not messing it up, I'm cleaning it up. And if I'm not up to that, I have a 120-year-old billiard table downstairs. Finally, if I have to, there's always TV. > I spend a lot of time in Prayer and meditation, sometimes fasting a day or > two to empasise to my Lord that HE is more important to me than food. THAT > does help - sometimes. You should throw that one out the window as well. Fasting and even serious dieting will cause your autoimmune system to shut down fairly early on while the body perceives you to be starving. I'm sure God will understand it if you do not selecte harmful sacrifices. > I'm surprised that Steve K and IP have not taken advantage of that forum! I never saved the URL. It does sound interesting, assuming it's done early enough in the evening. > Or, like JOB, is my Lord just testing me to see how far I will go before > denying Him? ( I NEVER will - HE is my reason for living and my King the > Lord Christ - my REDEMPTION) Job had a little help from the devil. Hopefully, he's not visiting you as often. SignaturePSA 16 10/17/2000 @ 46 Biopsy 11/01/2000 G7 (3+4), T2c RRP 12/15/2000 G7 (3+4), T3cN0M0 Neg margins PSA <.1 <.1 <.1 .27 .37 .75 PSAD 0.19 years EBRT 05-07/2002 @ 47 PSA .34 .22 .15 .21 .32 PSAD .056 years Lupron 07/03 (1 mo) 8/03 and every 4 months there after PSA .07 .05 .06 .09 .08 .132 .145 PSAD 1.4 years Casodex added daily 07/06 PSA <0.04, <0.05, <0.04 (06/12/2007) Non Illegitimi Carborundum Sweetheart, Now you have given me a long weepy session. I don't know what you are talking about when you say I haven't responded to you. I got your last letter 8/14, 8 pm and responded at 10:30. I asked for an update on how you were feeling. I have been sitting by the computer waiting to hear from you. Maybe there's a drug that can ease the tremors. And the hip pain may abate on its own, if I understood correctly. Plus as Alan wrote so beautifully, there is still the pleasure of listening to music. Remember when you wrote that you weren't ready to die, there was still music to be played? Well, there's still music to be listened to. When I am feeling down I like listening to hymns and spirituals -- like Mahalia Jackson. > A recent dissapointment regarding my Son adds to my discontent. What exactly is that? What you wrote me about? The boy just turned 18. He's practically a child. And he's got a lot on his mind. Remember when he said, "I love you, Dad" and gave you all those hugs that practically smothered you? Think about what you said about the time you gave him his birthday present: "I would do anything to see a smile on my bonny laddie's face." And how the time when a drop of water got on his eye and the way the sunlight hit it made you see rainbows? Finally, let's not forget those impossibly long eyelashes. > I spend a lot of time in Prayer and meditation, sometimes fasting a day or > two to empasise to my Lord that HE is more important to me than food. THAT does help - sometimes. It's bad for 2 reasons. You need your strength. Also, if the Lord gave you a talent for cooking, obviously He meant for you to use it. Whip up something special for the boy. > I belong to a chat group in Arizona where we talk every Saturday night - If you are feeling low you can chat with a real person on the phone at any hour of the day or night. There are a number of crisis hotlines available to you, and you shouldn't hesitate to make use of them. It's better than therapy because the person is doing it out of conviction and not for money. And they will talk as long as you want. Forget about being embarrassed. That goes for anybody. Google your local county or state and "mental health association", "crisis hotline" or "helplines." ======================= The Samaritans offer free, confidential advice 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Call: 0845 7 909090, Breathing Space is a free, confidential phoneline service for any individual who is experiencing low mood or depression, or who is unusually worried and in need of someone to talk to. Breathing Space operates between 6pm and 2am. Call: 0800 83 85 87 or visit: www.breathingspacescotland.org.uk NHS 24 works in partnership with local NHS Boards out-of-hours services to provide patients with health advice and help when GP practices are closed. Call: 0845 4242424 or visit: www.nhs24.com Befriending is an additional service, complimentary to our other services. It is where a trained volunteer spends time with someone who, through various circumstances, has become isolated. Both people will meet on a regular basis and share an activity together (sorry I lost the rest). More at samh.org.uk, gamh.org.uk and prostatecancer.org.uk. Also macmillan.org.uk has 3 cancer hotlines. ========================= > You guys with wives or who are in relationships that really mean something have a great advantage over us singles. Well, I'm your friend, even wrote a couple of stories about you on my blog. Do you think I'm a man or something? My husb just asked if I might be able to make some time for him. Maybe, but first things first. > There's just SO much sh.t pouring down and for some reason I'm it's target > (I said this to my friend Leah but so far she hasn't replied to that) What else besides the health problems? >WHO the f.ck did I offend so much in a previous life? Sounds like you're talking about karma, and according to that principle those who die young have "higher souls." So maybe you didn't offend anybody. > Or am I just my usual feeling sorry for myself? Jesus, My King, He knows I wasn't like this a year ago. Didn't Jesus say on the Cross, "My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?" Maybe it's OK to feel sorry for yourself sometimes. BTW, that phrase is from the Psalm book, which is a very comforting thing to read when you're in trouble. The boss just walked in. Apologize for the length of this, but there are extenuating circumstances. L. > What do you guys do? > [quoted text clipped - 44 lines] > interject. > (Sorry Alex - couldn't help that) Hugh, dear Friend: Your feelings must be somewhat like the inadequacy I feel in responding. I wish I could touch you in the physical sense not the metaphoric sense. We are your partners. You have taught while I have learned from you. You have a transatlantic influence. Keep typing. Just keep typing. . >What do you guys do? I can't put myself in your shoes or anything like, Hughie, but I think this would be my plan. For starters, I would definitely be asking for some anti-depressant medication. On the few occasions when I've been in the depths - entirely different circumstances so can't in any way compare the nature or magnitude of mine with yours - it's been impossible to make a start on anything, I've just been marking time and feeling awful, there's nothing to hang on to, nothing to pull on. So anti-depressants are, I'm quite sure, a good idea, I wouldn't need any persuading. THEN...what about reading? There's some wonderful literature around to get stuck into. Fiction, history, biogs, whatever takes your fancy. Tune into radio 4's Bookclub and go to the program's archive to listen to earlier programs and recommendations. Nothing, to my mind, transports or elevates us quite as much as ideas. If possible, I'd find a local book group where others are keen to talk about and suggest books to read. There are lots of these about and it's always a real plus to talk to someone about a book you're enjoying. Alan has suggested music, and I think art in general can pack a big therapeutic punch. Museums, galleries, whatever you can get to. I love film and reading and would happily lock myself away with a pile of DVDs and books, BUT - I would most certainly be taking anti-depressants just to get me out of the trough, to provide a bottom rung and to help me get outside myself.-r > What do you guys do? > [quoted text clipped - 45 lines] > interject. > (Sorry Alex - couldn't help that) Hugh, I am so sorry for your pain, and glad I was wrong. It's clear that, with your strong religious feelings, prayer and meditation, you've got the "internal" side covered. On the "external" side, it sounds like you are somewhat limited in what you can do physically because of the trembling, etc. But if you can get some modest exercise -- walking, swimming, even walking back and forth in the shallow end of a pool -- you may find that helps fight the funk. If you can find a few others to exercise with you, that can help maintain the commitment and provide some companionship. In very hot or cold climates, some groups walk inside malls. And as others have suggested, try renting every Marx Brothers or other silly comedy you can find. As for disappointment from your 18-year old son -- I have a daughter that age, and I think driving us crazy is their main goal at about that time of their lives. What helps me is remembering what an idiot I was at 18. Alex > What do you guys do? > ... > WHAT do you guys do? > Interested to know. > HUGHIE. (Very mixed up right now) It's a bummer with all the problems you are having! I am following behind and I guess we will all get there sooner or later. There are a few items that have helped me as I have a poor tolerance for most meds messing up my system, especially androgen deprivation. I found it was the loss of estrogen that did me in so now I am on estrogen patches - a Climara 50 patch once a week and it helps with my emotional and mental stability. Then to get myself going and doing something instead of just sitting and being a vegetable, I found that Ritalin helps. This is what gets me going and trying to enjoy what I have left. Lud > What do you guys do? > [quoted text clipped - 44 lines] > interject. > (Sorry Alex - couldn't help that) Twenty five years ago I found physical activity helped me a lot. I still run and walk every day to relieve the tensions. It is my thinking and calming time. dale j. SignatureEmail: dalej2@mac.com |
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