i found this pamphlet at the urology office.  it was the only copy in
the whole big display.  

i will post this as a trial to see in any one is interested.  it is in
sections.   it is has a lot of information.  

if the newsgroup feels it is worthwhile for the women of men who have
prostate cancer.

~ curtis
================
TITLE - women speak out about a man's disease

your partner has been diagnosed with prostate cancer. or maybe he is
your father, brother, uncle or grandfather.

you are in shock.  all you hear is the word cancer and you feel as if
your world is crashing in on you.  this man you love and with whom you
share life has cancer. you're scared.

you find yourself asking many questions.  where do i go for advice?
does he have to have surgery?  radiation? will he live?  and if he does,
what will be the quality of his life?  can he continue to work?  what,
and when, do we tell our family and friends?  and what exactly is a
prostate, anyway? all this on top of everything else, your job, bill to
pay, family responsibilities, vacations, yet untaken.  your life is a
juggling act, just as it is under the best of circumstance.  you wonder
how you can possibly manage it all.

take heart.  you can manage and cope with what lies ahead.  in this
brochure,  you will learn how other women coped once their husbands were
diagnosed with prostate cancer.

the personal experiences shared in this brochure offer reassurance that
you are not alone.  many others have traveled this journey before you,
and survived.  you can too.

WHAT CAN I DO TO HELP? - preparing for treatment

How do i prepare?  - make early detection a priority.  encourage the man
in your life to see a doctor for regular physicals, even when he is
feeling well.  with prostate cancer, symptoms often do not appear until
the late stage of the disease.

at this late stage, symptoms may include bone pain, frequent urination,
blood in the urine, weak urine steam or inability to urinate.

so don't wait until he experiences these problems.  according to the
american cancer society(ACS), every man aged 40 and over should have a
digital rectal exam (DRE)as part of his annual physical checkup.  the
ACS also recommends that men aged 50 and over have an annual prostate
specific antigen (PSA) blood test.  if either result is suspicious,
further evaluation should be performed.

WHAT'S NEXT?....."He could have pushed me away and i could have walked
away, but because of our love, we built our strength off each other"
Betty Gallo, widow of new jersey congressman Dean Gallo.

once someone you care about is diagnosed with prostate cancer , you
first responsibility is to help him get well.  sometimes that will mean
talking and sometimes just listening.
as with many men diagnosed with prostate cancer, your partner may feel
his manhood has been attacked.  and h may be uncomfortable sharing his
feelings.  try to be understanding.  encourage him to talk about what
he's feeling, both physically and emotionally.  this is a time when the
two of you can draw closer together and talk about each other's fears
and concerns.

to help your partner talk with you about his disease start with how you
are felling, such as "i feel sad....."   "i feel hurt...." "i
feel......."  some emotion.  once he hears your thoughts and feelings,
he may be more willing to communicate his.

while it is important that the two of you keep an open dialogue, you may
need additional support from friends and family members.  decide as a
couple when it's time to talk with other, and support your partner's
wishes if he's not eager to share the news with others immediately.

end of first post.

if anyone wants me to post anymore of this pamphlet, the next two topics
are -

INFORMATION - how do i find it?

WHAT'S NEXT? - what should i expect?

knowledge is power - growing old is mandatory - growing wise is optional    
"Many more men die with prostate cancer than of it. Growing old is
invariably fatal. Prostate cancer is only sometimes so."
http://community.webtv.net/PALMER_ENT/doc