A woman brought a very limp duck into her veterinarians office. As she laid
her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to
the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and
said, "I'm so sorry, Cuddles has passed away."

The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure?"

"Yes, I am sure. The duck is dead," he replied.

"How can you be so sure," she protested. "I mean, you haven't done any
testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."

The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room, and returned a
few moments later with a black Labrador Retriever. The dog stood on his hind
legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck  from
top to bottom. He then looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook his  head.
The vet patted the dog and took it out.

"How can you be so sure," she protested. "I mean, you only done one test on
him.

A few moments later the vet returned with a beautiful cat. The cat jumped
up on the table and also sniffed delicately at the duck. The cat sat back
on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the
room.

The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is
most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."

Then the vet turned to his computer, hit a few keys and produced a bill
which he handed to the woman. The duck's owner, still in shock, took the
bill. "$250!" she cried, " $250 just to tell me my duck is dead?!!"

The vet shrugged. "I'm sorry. If you'd taken my word for it the bill would
have only been $50, but what with the Lab Report and the Cat
Scan.............."