Medical Forum / Diseases and Disorders / Cancer / March 2007
Ping Isi
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J - 23 Feb 2007 08:47 GMT How are you doing? Thinking of you. J
islavision2004@yahoo.com - 25 Feb 2007 09:56 GMT > How are you doing? > Thinking of you. > J Hi J,
I am doing ok thanks - sometimes up sometimes down, but overall feeling stronger, pain is still decreasing and weaning myself off the codeine pills. Still taking the herbs - are they working who knows! time will tell, if i'm still here in ten years time lol. On Thursday I felt well, it was wonderful, paid for it Friday and Saturday!
As the pain is getting less I am staying away from the medics, as I find it demoralising to focus too much of my 'up energy' time on my condition, when I don't have energy, I sleep, I tend to sleep a lot these days.
I have been reading the journal Penny kept as a blog what a wonderful lady, so brave - also very frightening at the end, for me as I will have to do that journey alone it make me feel a little lost and I worry about palliative care here, there is one centre in the country as far as I can make out, and it's 4 hour cab ride away then the same to get back home so I think it's too far for the last days.
All the best, be well :-) isi
J - 25 Feb 2007 18:54 GMT > I am doing ok thanks - sometimes up sometimes down, but overall > feeling stronger, pain is still decreasing and weaning myself off the [quoted text clipped - 13 lines] > as far as I can make out, and it's 4 hour cab ride away then the same > to get back home so I think it's too far for the last days. Hello isi, Thanks for the update and your thoughts. We don't know how things will go for you, but I sure hope you have someone (or a few) nearby who can care for you and see to any medications, as required; not 4 hours away.
May your days be blessed with warm and caring people, things you love to do, music or talk which you enjoy and many other pleasures of life.
cyberhugs from me to you. J
islavision2004@yahoo.com - 26 Feb 2007 15:25 GMT > On Feb 25, islavision2...@yahoo.com wrote: > [quoted text clipped - 29 lines] > > - Show quoted text - J
Thank you for you works of kindness they mean so much. (((hugs))) isi
J - 16 Mar 2007 17:48 GMT > > How are you doing? > > Thinking of you. [quoted text clipped - 17 lines] > as far as I can make out, and it's 4 hour cab ride away then the same > to get back home so I think it's too far for the last days. How's it going isi? It's been a while since your last update. ** hugs *** J
islavision2004@yahoo.com - 16 Mar 2007 22:23 GMT > How are you doing? > Thinking of you. > J Hi J
Thanks for your thoughts:-) I am plodding on thanks - no change in my physical self as far as I can tell. Feel really down this week, so been in my bed too much I think - reading books at an alarming rate, my escape from the end of winter blues perhaps. I am very tired and only comfortable in bed much nicer than going outside in the cold streets. I ought to be out there doing things, but not sure what to do. Can't write much now sorry - I just feel down anti-depressents don't agree with me so can't go down that road - have to try and motivate myself. Bring on the Spring :-) This is a crazy situation I wake each day and thank Jesus that I am alive, do my morning things then head back to bed! I am physically more comfortable in bed than anywhere else, but my condition is not so bad that I HAVE to stay in bed I could go out and do things, just have trouble getting myself together. Loss of dreams - so what should I do now I ask myself, as yet have not come up with an answer. Sorry if this is whining, just the way it is right now
hugs isi
J - 19 Mar 2007 11:27 GMT > On March 15th, > Thanks for your thoughts:-) I am plodding on thanks - no change in my [quoted text clipped - 17 lines] > hugs > isi Hello isi. Thank you for the hugs. Everyone here is dreaming of Spring. We get our hopes up with warming and then it snows again and all the streets go quiet. Cabin fever is setting in here as well.
Does it get hot where you are? I'm looking forward to showering outdoors with the hose. It's wonderful drying outdoors in the sun.
I've seen your dream, in my "mind's eye" (different versions of) and it looked oh so good. Sometimes when a persons dream ends; another door opens. Maybe while reading those books, and lying in bed, looking outside, another one will come to you.. I love the scent and feel of catnip. One person's weed is someone else's mint. hmmm...I wonder if I made a cream out of that, what would happen. If I disappear, it might be because I was attacked by a "gang of marauding felines". Don't mind me, I'm rambling.
I hope you find a new dream to explore once the nice weather comes. Hugs J
islavision2004@yahoo.com - 19 Mar 2007 19:16 GMT > islavision2...@yahoo.com wrote: > > On March 15th, [quoted text clipped - 45 lines] > > - Show quoted text - Hi J
Spring has arrived at last the weather just turned and it's 60 degrees outside now, hope it stays. Got myself out for a walk, the first in months, a warm breeze, fish swimming in the river, the blossom in many trees, sun warm on my face, it was a wonderful walk and lifted my soul. It gets very hot here in the summer so I am still thinking of perhaps looking for a home with a garden, to be able to sit outside with the trees and birds. It's just hard to get it all together when my energy is so low. Currently I live in an apartment it's claustrophobic I am not used to being without a garden.
Life is made of spirals some go up, some go down, the trick to happiness is to keep riding the rising spiral, sometimes like the last time I wrote I had been tossed off and landed on a spiral heading down, hopefully that has now changed.
Someone told me that I am like the little boy who cried 'wolf' because I am not dead yet! Still alive and not doing too badly, I am able to function, I do employ some help for the heavy chores and because of this I have been accused of - what???
This has really disturbed me I am a very straight person and don't tell lies. Because I am not dead yet, I am accused of crying wolf! What am I supposed to do die just to prove that I spoke the truth as the doctors told it to me. This is crazy it makes me feel almost guilty for staying alive and able to walk and get about slowly, very slowly as I do tire easily...
I wonder if this is a common phenomena for people who look like they are going to outlive their original prognosis it's bizarre. I think people offer help and stuff in the beginning when one is in shock and they are also in shock, then many people and turn away. I hate this I should not feel guilty for surviving 8 months since diagnosis and my 13 months prognosis does not expire until August, then if I am still feeling ok I will feel like having a party - to me surviving is a reason to celebrate.
Another reason to celebrate is that my pain is now controlled thanks to codeine and my helpful doctor, he would have given me morphine but I don't think I need that yet. This has released my worry of the end stages and increased my confidence that I will be able to exit pain free, as you know my greatest fear is pain. In April I will have an x- ray or scan to see what's going on.
Lots of feral cats over here so if you make your cream and market it here, it would have to come with a warning lol
Thanks for the chuckle Blessings and Hugs isi
J - 20 Mar 2007 08:48 GMT > > I love the scent and feel of catnip. One person's weed is someone else's > > mint. [quoted text clipped - 47 lines] > Lots of feral cats over here so if you make your cream and market it > here, it would have to come with a warning lol A neighbor tore one plant out last summer (this side of the fence). I think I'll steal his veggie this year (this side of the fence). <g>
A house with a verandah, for sitting out, but then I spoil the dream with practicalities. like what happens to the house after you pass away. "Modest" homes, in estate sales, are "steals".
I'm happy for you, isi that Spring has arrived. We're experiencing a blast of winter again.
Have your pathology report printed on some colorful summer t-shirts? Or on the "butt" of your shorts? J
islavision2004@yahoo.com - 24 Mar 2007 18:43 GMT > islavision2...@yahoo.com wrote: > > > I love the scent and feel of catnip. One person's weed is someone else's [quoted text clipped - 62 lines] > "butt" of your shorts? > J- Hide quoted text - Just found this post again I thought it had vanished. You go get those veggies J LOL
Winter came back again but it was great to taste spring for a couple of days, now it's back into the thermals and heating at full blast.
Yes a house with a veranda would be wonderful, when I am gone I am gone I don't have any family so don't have to think resale value, just have to ensure that I have enough to live on for the rest of my days however long that may be and can cope with the garden ummm
Good idea about the T shirt and printing thing - still I am over it now.
all the best isi
J - 26 Mar 2007 09:53 GMT > > > It gets very hot here in the summer so I am still thinking of perhaps > > > looking for a home with a garden, to be able to sit outside with the [quoted text clipped - 50 lines] > have to ensure that I have enough to live on for the rest of my days > however long that may be and can cope with the garden ummm Hello isi, It's taken me so long to reply that our weather has changed 3 times.. lol
I'll take it under advisement about the veggies - Thanks.
How does one buy a home in your country? Walk around and look for some or read advertisements or word of mouth or agency? And what type of garden are you wanting, flowers, shrubs etc or vegetable and fruit as well? I'm just curious.
Also just sharing that there's other types of homes.
Don't these look lovely ? http://www.tumbleweedhouses.com/houses.htm Some are transportable, so the owner pays a rental fee, as he/she travels or stops somewhere and does not have to pay property taxes.
The top one was featured on TV a few weeks ago and we were given a tour of the home. A writer lives in one with his cat. The show was featuring "tiny homes that work".
Another home that was featured was built in Greenwich Village, New York City (where space is hard to find), by a couple who paid for an alleyway, between 2 buildings and built a compact but roomy 2-story home, with the master and ensuite on the 2nd floor and a large patio at the back with garden, surrounded by a rock wall and a beautiful view. Lots of sunshine and room for entertaining visitors. If I recall correctly there was an extra room for visitors. I think it was a couple and one child. They had money for better/bigger (elsewhere) but wanted to stay in the same neighborhood where they had friends.
The other one was the skinniest home in the world, but I forget the details.
Let us know how your home search goes and how you're doing, please. Hugs to isi, J
islavision2004@yahoo.com - 29 Mar 2007 21:37 GMT > islavision2...@yahoo.com wrote: > > > > It gets very hot here in the summer so I am still thinking of perhaps [quoted text clipped - 84 lines] > Hugs to isi, > J- Hide quoted text - Hi J
I think the tumbleweedhouses are so cute. Make a great little summer retreat.
Buying a home here is much the same as anywhere, ads and agents carefully avoiding sharks lots of them around. Word of mouth is best as it cuts out agents fees but that difficult when one does not speak the language. I don't think I will ever learn, my concentration is kaput and I go out so rarely that I don't often speak to anyone to practice.
It's very difficult for me to find a house as I tire so easily, by the time I get up eat breakfast wash up and do a bit of cleaning, have a shower, all I feel like doing is sleeping again. My hope is that when the weather gets a little warmer I will have more available energy to find my home. I have to move out of this place before next winter as there is too much wood smoke here in town and it hinders my breathing, don't think I could survive another winter of wood smoke.
Most houses have vines and orchards which I will keep, also a vegie patch - the rest, a patio and low maintainence, shrubs and roses, it's difficult to plan a garden as they take a long time to grow. I just hope I can find help with the heavy work as there is no way I can tend it fully myself. But what a joy to wander outside in the morning in my slippers, with a cup of coffee. Bliss.
I find that since my diagnosis it's difficult to plan anything as I don't know when my end date will arrive, I know, none of us do know that but we usually think we are immortal until told otherwise, it's that feeling of 'I will live forever' that goes when told you have stage IV cancer. If I make it past the July deadline perhaps I will feel immortal once again or at least have more confidence that I am not going to drop at any moment.
Perhaps I will forget about trying to keep this place clean and just go house hunting instead. lol What a joy it would be not to have party walls, floors and ceilings, it becomes very embarrassing when I am having heavy coughing fits, I am sure I am disturbing the neighbours in the night.
Must find a house so I can cough in peace lol
Take care and thanks for caring, hugs
isi :-)
J - 30 Mar 2007 10:50 GMT > > How does one buy a home in your country? Walk around and look for some or read > > advertisements or word of mouth or agency? And what type of garden are you wanting, [quoted text clipped - 61 lines] > > isi :-) Hello isi, If you moved now, into a clean house, you could skip the cleaning part this year and focus on walks with your coffee or on the patio: dreaming and planning your garden. Do check a home of interest, at different times of the day, in case there's wood burning or barbecue smoke. It happens in many areas and you wouldn't want to be downwind of such each day. You'll also know which neighbors have noisy kids or noisy dogs or noisy parties; drumming lessons; too much traffic. Sometimes observing in the car while you drink your coffee, can tell you a lot about a neighborhood.
I hope you can find someone to go with you to translate and avoid pitfalls and look for problems, that you might not see about a property.
Buy a place in front of (or beside) someone who has an orchard. Let them do the work and maintenance. If they're nice, they'll let you wander through and share the fruit with you.
So get moving searching. It's too wet and cold here at the moment, but if you time this right, we can arrange a cyber date to both go walking outside, in our slippers; you with your coffee, me with my tea.
Don't get lost though; I hope to hear good news from you soon.
J - trying to downsize your home dream (and work related to) a bit.
Figgertoes - 20 Mar 2007 14:06 GMT > Someone told me that I am like the little boy who cried 'wolf' because > I am not dead yet! Still alive and not doing too badly, I am able to [quoted text clipped - 16 lines] > feeling ok I will feel like having a party - to me surviving is a > reason to celebrate.
> Blessings and Hugs > isi isi,
I hope it is just someone who didn't know what to say or how to say it & it just came out badly. That person may be kicking self now?
Surviving is indeed a reason for celebration. And springtime a time for renewal. I love it when the birds come back in great numbers & there's chirping & singing. Lots of noise, but joyful, like they're glad to be back. I guess I should fill the feeder. Do you have a bird feeder? We enjoy sitting at the breakfast table & watching. There's a particular tree I call the bird tree where they wait their turns at the feeder - hundreds of birds. You can really tell that's what they're doing!
Happy Spring, isi! Fig
islavision2004@yahoo.com - 24 Mar 2007 18:54 GMT > islavision2...@yahoo.com wrote innews:1174328195.641823.9230@l75g2000hse.googlegroups.com: > [quoted text clipped - 36 lines] > Happy Spring, isi! > Fig- Hide quoted text - Hi Fig,
I don't know if the person thought before they said their silly remark or not, perhaps not, this persone seems to be one of those people who always have to say someting about anything. Anyway I was in the wrong to let his remark get to me.
Spring came and went now awaiting it's return - soon I hope :-)
My mother had a bird tree in her garden, all the birds would wait twice a day for her to go out and fill the feeders. I will do that if I manage to find a house with a tree. I love to watch birds they are so funny and it's so peaceful just to watch them soar and ride the wind. My nickname when I was a kid was wingflapper
Happy Spring to you too Fig
isi
Figgertoes - 25 Mar 2007 18:46 GMT >> islavision2...@yahoo.com wrote >> innews:1174328195.641823.9230@l75g2000hse.googlegroups.com: [quoted text clipped - 58 lines] > > isi Thank you, isi. I hope you find that house. Our spring comes/goes too. Today should be good for a little bike ride.
Fig
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