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Medical Forum / Diseases and Disorders / Cancer / September 2006My Mum Was Diagnosed with Gall Bladder Cancer on Sunday
J Thanx for the kind words. Tomorrow morning my mum has an appointment with the oncologist from the local cancer unit. The pharmacist has been up to see her and at present they are working out the dosages for the morphine tablets that she'll have to take from now till the end. I think once shes seen the oncologist and theyve told her whats happening in the near future and the pharmacist has sorted out her meds, she'll get home. Was up to see her again this evening and she was sitting up on the side of the bed and seemed settled (well settled as you can be). My mother god bless her has a very strong faith (RC) and believes that whatever happens is what god has decreed for her. She has always been a strong woman and im sure she'll fight this all the way to the finishing line. Im so so proud of her and i wish i had her strength. Will update tomorrow when i find out what the oncologist told her. Regards Tom  SignatureBetsy > J > [quoted text clipped - 20 lines] > > Tom Your Mom will do just what she was taught as a child. We can do anything we put our collective minds to. I wish I had more knowledge but I can only offer you, an ear to listen. Take care of her and remember your prayers at night. Betsy > Thanx for the kind words. Tomorrow morning my mum has an appointment with > the oncologist from the local cancer unit. The pharmacist has been up to see [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] > > Will update tomorrow when i find out what the oncologist told her. Hello Tom, We don't get a lot of gall bladder cancer (persons) here. I think that's because it's often picked up early due to being mistaken for gallstones and more chance at a (surgical) cure and/or lots of time to try treatments. If I recall correctly, Steph told us they see 1 or 2 cases/year at the centre where he practises. In other words, often caught early or late and extensive spread. Seems like that's your mother's situation. I'm relieved to hear that they're taking care of her pain. Steph developed an algorithm for his patients and he's shared it with us for patients to help make treatmnet decisions. I encourage patients to use it when discussing their cancer with their doctor. You may wish to print it up and give a copy to your mother (or be with her when her oncologist talks with her) to help her with these questions. They're archived here. <http://groups.google.com/group/alt.support.cancer/msg/1b25021ba108fca1?hl=en&lr= &ie=UTF-8> My thoughts will be with you all, during these next days as you hear what the oncologist has to say about your mother's situation. I'm sure you're mother's proud of you as well. We'll be here for you, Tom, anytime. Give a shout out, when you want a caring ear. J Hi J and Betsy Just in from work and my wife updated me on what happened with the oncologist. My wife sat in on the appointment as shes a nurse and could explain everything to my father who is hard of hearing. Basically the CT scan showed that my mother has a "large mass" on her liver, 2 or 3 spots/tumours on her lungs and indications on her lymph gland (where i dont know). After having discussed her situation she is going to try the chemotherapy. She has to go in for 3 cycles i believe at 3 week intervals and then get another scan at that point to see if the chemo is working. My wife is sure that the chemo is more of a palliative thing than an actual curative treatment. My mother has been made well aware of the potential side effects but has decided to give it a try. I know your friends and experience that the treatment is physically and emotionally draining, but if thats what she wants to do, we'll be behind her 110%. Another day since the diagnosis and still feel like crap. Not as weepy but im sure i'll have my good days and bad. Ive told my boss and colleagues and have been told that there will be no problems with me leaving in a hurry if i have to or if i require any time off. Must admit it was hard to talk about initally when i told my workmates, but the more i explained things the better i felt. Ive had so many people coming up to me and saying that theyre thinking about us all and its good to know that people really do care. Anyway enough for now. Wife told me to get out the chinese restaurant to get dinner so off i go. Thanks again for taking the time to listen and read my ramblings. Its good to know there are people out there who know what im going thru, though i didnt think id ever have to subscribe to a newsgroup like this and i dont mean that in a bad way. Goodnight and godbless to you all. From a cold and wet scotland. Kindest regards Tom > > Thanx for the kind words. Tomorrow morning my mum has an appointment with > > the oncologist from the local cancer unit. The pharmacist has been up to see [quoted text clipped - 28 lines] > her oncologist talks with her) to help her with these questions. They're > archived here. <http://groups.google.com/group/alt.support.cancer/msg/1b25021ba108fca1?hl=e n&lr=&ie=UTF-8> > My thoughts will be with you all, during these next days as you hear what the > oncologist has to say about your mother's situation. I'm sure you're mother's [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > ear. > J Hi Tom. I just lost my wife in July at the age of 49 to metastatic gall bladder cancer. She lived with it for 3+ years. The end was fairly pain-free. I hope for the best for you and your mom and your family as well. I'll be praying for you. The chemo protocol sounds like it might be Gemzar and Xeloda. Fortunately, the side effects are usually fairly mild. I hope it is helpful. Jeff > Hi J and Betsy > [quoted text clipped - 99 lines] > > ear. > > J Hi Jeff So sorry to hear about the sad loss of your wife. Im sure you can feel her presence looking over your shoulder every day. I know its no consolation whatsoever, but now she is totally pain free and is at peace. Im sure she knew as well that you loved and cared for her right up to the end and that she would want you to keep your chin up and carry on. I'm married 12 years this time round and i'd imagine id be absolutely lost without my wife god forbid anything happened to her. Its only when someone you love is diagnosed with a terminal illness, just how stupid all those petty arguments seem. I must admit before my mum was diagnosed, due to various committments ie work and home, i would only see her once a week, but now that i know every day from now on is a bonus, then i will make every effort to see her. Even if only for half an hour each evening after i get back from the office. Once my mother gets started on the chemo, ill let you know how shes getting on. Thanx for taking the time to offer your thoughts when you are yourself still grieving. My thoughts and my prayers are with you and your family. Keep your head held high.. There are a lot of kind loving people around you and on this forum and for me personally, it has been gratifying to find out that there are so many from all parts of the world that can say "i know exactly how you're feeling". Keep healthy. Speak soon. Tom > Hi Tom. > [quoted text clipped - 99 lines] > > > her oncologist talks with her) to help her with these questions. They're > > > archived here. <http://groups.google.com/group/alt.support.cancer/msg/1b25021ba108fca1?hl=e > > n&lr=&ie=UTF-8> > > > [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] > > > ear. > > > J > I just lost my wife in July at the age of 49 to metastatic gall bladder > cancer. She lived with it for 3+ years. The end was fairly pain-free. Ah yes, Hi Jeff, One met to the liver and one to the ovary. (she had surgery to the ovary? and some special procedure for the lobe of the liver?) Thanks for your post, Jeff. Tom won't feel so alone alone here. How are you and the kids coping, Jeff. J Hi J and thanks, Tom. The kids are doing surprisingly well. They lost their natural father last year, so they are keeping close tabs on me. They are also growing up significantly. I am amazed at how their outlook is maturing. They also make sure I check in every few days. I've bought a share in a sailboat, which has brought me some pleasure and peace of mind. It's a great escape to go out on the Chesapeake Bay and just deal with the moment. I'm also in a support group for widowed persons. I've met a nice widow there a few years younger than me who I have really hit it off with. We're starting to date (dinner tomorrow) and I think we will at least be good friends. It's early for both of us so we're taking it slow. As for the medical history, you remember it right, J. She had mets to the liver (which eventually killed her) and to the ovary. Surgery took care of the ovary and chemo kept her cancer free for a while, but it came back with several in the liver, so we tried SIRT treatment (Selective Internal Radiation Therapy). It didn't help as much as we were hoping for, so she started more chemo but had to stop when she developed a blood clot, some of which had traveled to a lung. That was the beginning of the end. Less than 2 months later, she was gone. We had time to make plans for the memorial service and everything, so I feel good about being able to know exactly what she wanted and was able to do it for her. It doesn't hurt any less, but I think the healing will be quicker. Jeff > > I just lost my wife in July at the age of 49 to metastatic gall bladder > > cancer. She lived with it for 3+ years. The end was fairly pain-free. [quoted text clipped - 7 lines] > > J > The kids are doing surprisingly well. They lost their natural father > last year, so they are keeping close tabs on me. They are also growing [quoted text clipped - 21 lines] > to do it for her. It doesn't hurt any less, but I think the healing > will be quicker. Ah, thanks for the reminder, Jeff about SIRT. My memory is good but not perfect. :) (couldn't remember the name of it). I'm pleased to read that the kids are handling the losses well and are keeping the close connection with you. I didn't know Bonnie personally (of course), but I'm sure she's looking down at you and happy that you've found another friend. I hope you have an enjoyable dinner and find a lasting friendship, if not companionship. Good idea to take it slow and see what develops. I'm sure Tom will also appreciate having you here since you have a personal experience with same type of cancer. Keep in touch and let us know how you're all doing. Kindly, J > Anyway enough for now. Wife told me to get out the chinese restaurant to > get [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > > Kindest regards Glad you have your wife to support you and your mother. Also glad to hear your workmates are supportive. Good to support your mother's goals it sounds like you wife will keep you all grounded. It is very difficult time of one's life, don't be too hard on yourself. Best wishes to you and your family, Alex > Just in from work and my wife updated me on what happened with the > oncologist. My wife sat in on the appointment as shes a nurse and could [quoted text clipped - 22 lines] > better i felt. Ive had so many people coming up to me and saying that theyre > thinking about us all and its good to know that people really do care. Sorry I'm late replying, Tom. You sounded rather in a hurry and I've been rather pressed for time myself this week.. I hope the Chinese dinner was enjoyable. I'm pleased to read that your boss and colleagues are supportive and understanding of the situation and that you're getting the same attitude from many others. If I may, if any of them offter to help, have a list, in your head ready, and suggest something concrete. Someone to sit with your mother, in case your father wants to go for an outing, from time to time? It's reassuring that you all have a good grasp of your mother's situation. Being a nurse, your wife will no doubt be a valuable resource, as treatments proceed. The treatment plan sounds very reasonable to me. Good luck with that. I see in later post, you intend to check in with your mother daily. I'm sure both she and your father will appreciate that. Your mother's in good hands. Take good care of yourself as well and gets lots of rest, as you are able. We'll be here caring, anytime. Best, J |
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