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Medical Forum / Diseases and Disorders / Cancer / May 2005Roll Call - alt.support.cancer
It's time. There's been so many missing members.. Please check in and let us know how you're doing. Some of you know the spiel... Put your type of cancer/stage in the subject line (afrer the words "Roll Call") reply to my message, delete my text, start typing what you have to tell us. J New to n/g Name's Rob Diagnosed august 04, ependymoma between c3 - c6 vertebrae operation 1 week later. 6 weeks radiotherapy, now just wait and see. Major pain problems since, now on 150mg morphine daily plus liquid m for extra, which gets used quite a bit, so regular slow release dose due to go up again. Had to learn how to walk again, using a cane now. Lost a lot of motor control in hands, and very little feeling left, but I'm alive, walking, talking and glad of that. Could have been a lot worse. 52yrs, New Zealand, x puter nerd (forcibly retired sysadmin. Yipeeeeeee) Rob phstpok at ihug dot co dot nz > Diagnosed august 04, ependymoma between c3 - c6 vertebrae > operation 1 week later. [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] > > 52yrs, New Zealand, x puter nerd (forcibly retired sysadmin. Yipeeeeeee) Hello Rob and welcome. I missed your first post, but I see that others replied to you. New Zealand eh? I sure wish we had a map for posters to place themselves on. Bravenet has one, but I suspect one has to pay for the webpage and the map. Whoops it's free, but for some reason I cannot access it. I'm sorry you've had such a rough time of it, but pleased to read that you've recovered your ability to walk. We haven't had much mention of such tumours, according to the archives, but I see a support group on the BrainTrust website http://www.braintrust.org/adultependymoma.htm (in case you weren't aware). But you're sure welcome here too, so post anytime. Best, J Dad Has secondry liver cancer, bowl cancer being the primary. Dad is still with us, we thought he wouldnt make it to his birthday last year, but his next one is in 2 weeks. He is no longer driving and has great difficulty walking. He spends most of his days in bed now because it is just too painful to move. He has some very big lumps in his tummy and we assume its the tumours in his liver. Its awful to watch but he is being eaten alive by it. > Dad Has secondry liver cancer, bowl cancer being the primary. > Dad is still with us, we thought he wouldnt make it to his birthday last [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > its the tumours in his liver. Its awful to watch but he is being eaten alive > by it. Hello Dawn, thank you for posting. I'm sorry to hear about your Dad, hun. He's been a brave "battler" for quite a time now. My thoughts will be with you over these next difficult times. Post anytime, if it helps. We're here to support you. Many hugs to you and your Dad, J > > Dad Has secondry liver cancer, bowl cancer being the primary. > > Dad is still with us, we thought he wouldnt make it to his birthday last [quoted text clipped - 11 lines] > Many hugs to you and your Dad, > J I second J's thoughts. If the road gets too tough and you need an ear/shoulder, we're here for you. Warm Hugs Alayne >> > Dad Has secondry liver cancer, bowl cancer being the primary. >> > Dad is still with us, we thought he wouldnt make it to his birthday [quoted text clipped - 24 lines] > > Alayne Thanks. Its hard finding someone to talk to who understands that its not just the cancer patient that suffers > "Alayne" <totallyfake@emailaddress.com> wrote in message > > [quoted text clipped - 25 lines] > Thanks. Its hard finding someone to talk to who understands that its not > just the cancer patient that suffers I know it's hard facing the end; I know it's hard accepting that the person won't be around any longer. Dawn, spend time with him, talk with him..listen. Some of us talk "to" people, but we aren't always good at talking "with" people. Sometimes just sitting nearby, holding his hand and being quiet or saying "Dad, remember when XXXX" can start a conversation that you will treasure for the rest of your life and help your father come to terms or give him some relief from some of the fears he might be feeling or give him the opportunity to say some things that he's wanted to say but never dared. Hugs, kisses, touch is also so important and sometimes that's all that's wanted at the time. And quiet to think about things. Pamper his senses: if he liked music, play some for him. If he liked sports; turn the TV or radio on for a while, but not too loud. Pamper his taste buds. Make various flavoured jello or koolaid ice cubes. Cherry is my fav. Find out what his fav flavour was. Take him back in time and it will also "wet his lips" when they're dry. If there's fav books or passages from same, read small amounts to him. So use this time well, Dawn. Many hugs to you and your Dad, J >>> > Dad Has secondry liver cancer, bowl cancer being the primary. >>> > Dad is still with us, we thought he wouldnt make it to his birthday [quoted text clipped - 28 lines] > Thanks. Its hard finding someone to talk to who understands that its not > just the cancer patient that suffers Dawn I have been in your shoes. My Dad died of colorectal cancer in Sept 2003. All I can advise is to spend as much time as you can being together. Refresh old memories and make new ones - they are truly a comfort when he is gone. My best wishes to you and your family Sinead > >> > Dad Has secondry liver cancer, bowl cancer being the primary. > >> > Dad is still with us, we thought he wouldnt make it to his birthday [quoted text clipped - 27 lines] > Thanks. Its hard finding someone to talk to who understands that its not > just the cancer patient that suffers Sometimes you have to have "been there" to understand. Sadly, there are a few of us here that have been in similar situations and remember too well the emotions and the obstacles that we came across. If there can be anything at all positive taken from our experiences it is that we are all that bit more compassionate and humbled by it. If you feel the need to vent Dawn, we are all listening and here for you. It can be so so tough honey but you will find an inner strength that will help you through. Spend some time with your Dad and make sure that you say everything to him that you really need to, so that there are no regrets. Warm Hugs Alayne Name is Sinead Lost Dad to colorectal cancer. I came here for support and found it. Now I find myself wanting to know how everyone is doing.... > Name is Sinead > > Lost Dad to colorectal cancer. > > I came here for support and found it. Now I find myself wanting to know how > everyone is doing.... Thanks Sinead. I echo your sentiment. I just saw AR George in the archives, and I wonder how he's doing. There's so many we've not heard from for quite a while. Once they've touched our lives with theirs, it's hard not hearing from them.. J Still here. Bonnie had a great scan last week. No evidence of tumor activity on the PET/CT. Chemo continues, but they stopped the Xeloda early in cycle 4 due to foot problems. Will start again in cycle 5 with reduced dosage. They're planning 8 cycles in all, which will end at the end of June. Jeff > Still here. Bonnie had a great scan last week. No evidence of tumor > activity on the PET/CT. Chemo continues, but they stopped the Xeloda > early in cycle 4 due to foot problems. Will start again in cycle 5 > with reduced dosage. They're planning 8 cycles in all, which will end > at the end of June. Jeff, so pleased to hear from you and hearing Bonnie's success. Don't be a stranger. Sinead said so. ;-) So a holiday from chemo just in time for summer, sounds like a great idea. Best wishes, J > Still here. Bonnie had a great scan last week. No evidence of tumor > activity on the PET/CT. Chemo continues, but they stopped the Xeloda [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > > Jeff Looking over your shoulder Jeff and sending Warm Wishes. Warm Hugs Alayne > It's time. There's been so many missing members.. > Please check in and let us know how you're doing. [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > reply to my message, delete my text, start typing what you have to tell > us. I forgot to add a few things: New posters welcome too. There's two posters here that it would be wise to not reply to but use your newsreader "filter" system. Those who read other newsgroups already know to avoid/filter.. "ironjustice@aol.com" <ironjustice@aol.com> another one is burglar_of_turds@yahoo.com (if he continues to post as "J") Thank you J Hi J, Still lurking. Diagnosed colon primary and liver mets Jan 2003. Colon surgery Mar '03. Chemo to Jan 2004. Liver resection Sept 2004. Chemo Dec '04 to Mar '03. Last CT clear. Hick line out last week. Yipee! Been in since Oct '03. Alf > Still lurking. > Diagnosed colon primary and liver mets Jan 2003. [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] > Last CT clear. > Hick line out last week. Yipee! Been in since Oct '03. Thumbs up, Alf ! (hope you don't mind, I fixed the date problem) Hey, hey, lots to celebrate there in your post. Perhaps you'll be getting on with other things but do keep in touch, And not just bad news; it's good for the others to hear about good things on this newsgroup. (hope you understand) J Checked with doc yesterday and blood tests for Betty today and CAT scan as soon as the hospital arranges it.Betty signed do not revive papers and register for hospice papers.I took all the meds with me and had the doc explain each and throw out whats not needed.Xray showed cancer in spine.The doc says do not give up on cruise yet because we may be able to help with the confusion.J was right I am afraid and there is more going on than just chemo brain and I did not want to admit it to myself. For my part I am enjoying every minute with Betty and she can still laugh and enjoy life.We watched Corner Gas on tv last night( a Canadian tv comedy) and she really go a kick out of it.I am glad that the pain has not started yet and I hope to be on top of it if when it comes.I could use some pointer here I suppose. Gordo > Checked with doc yesterday and blood tests for Betty today and CAT > scan as soon as the hospital arranges it.Betty signed do not revive [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] > comes.I could use some pointer here I suppose. > Gordo Hello Gordo, Sorry to read that Betty is further on the rollercoaster ride than you thought (it's a defence mechanism for the eyes not to see and the head not to believe, and an understandable one). It's good that she has hospice organised, no matter how much we care or what we feel we can cope with, back-up is always a good idea. It's also positive that the doc. says not to give up on the cruise yet and that you are both still able to laugh; quality is what counts over quantity. Your road may get tougher and if you ever need any moral support, I am sure that myself and others here are always willing to lend an ear/hug. Warm Hugs Alayne > Checked with doc yesterday and blood tests for Betty today and CAT > scan as soon as the hospital arranges it.Betty signed do not revive [quoted text clipped - 9 lines] > the pain has not started yet and I hope to be on top of it if when it > comes.I could use some pointer here I suppose. Hello Gordo, I am so very sad to read the news. I was so hoping for a better outcome for Betty and/or much more time. It's good to read that you and she are still having pleasurable times and I hope your doctor is right about the cruise. Great idea; taking in all her pills. That will clear the way to see if anything improves and a fresh start for hospice, when they start getting involved. You may want to start daily diarying her pain levels (or other symptoms) and additional medications taken as req'd. Might be helpful to hospice to have a "history" to browse through. Gordo, there may still be a role for radiation therapy (regarding the spine) - I don't know ; so/but don't close that door to possibility. You may even want to do a "heads up" to the radiation oncologist (or perhaps that's already been discussed). And yes, ask Steph here as events occur. We'll be here the best we can too, if questions should crop up. And vent, if that helps. We're here to listen and care. I'm sure you'll be busy making the most of the time left with Betty, but please pop in once in a while and let us know how you are doing and especially before leaving for the cruise. You know we'll be worrying if we don't hear. I would like the opportunaity to say Bon Voyage and know when to watch for your return. (Sometimes I post relevant websites around the same time as an expected event occurs..if I remember). Special hugs to Betty and you, J >> Checked with doc yesterday and blood tests for Betty today and CAT >> scan as soon as the hospital arranges it.Betty signed do not revive [quoted text clipped - 32 lines] >Special hugs to Betty and you, >J Betty told me we were not going on the cruise. Betty and I went on a nice slow walk in Oyster Bay Park where I photographed an eagle that Betty pointed out to me and took some pictures of Betty as well.Later in the day after I was shopping I went back to the car and Betty seemed in a daze so I asked her how many fingers I was holding up. She said"OK" and could not answer anything at all. I took her home and cooked a pizza. She just sat there so I fed her and put a glass of water to her lips and she drank. I knew that she would get no supper at the hospital and I knew that was where we were heading. After having her admitted a doctor came and told us they had the results of the CAT scan and it was that Betty had tumors all over her brain.They are going to give her some steroids and hope to bring back her cognition but the chance for radiation seems hopeless. So that's an update for now Gordo > [...] > Betty told me we were not going on the cruise. [quoted text clipped - 11 lines] > brain.They are going to give her some steroids and hope to bring back > her cognition but the chance for radiation seems hopeless. I wish I was there to wrap my arms around you both, Gordo. It's SCLC. I'm still holding out hope for radiation therapy, steroids and the cruise. ( ( ( Gordo and Betty ) ) ) J > >> Checked with doc yesterday and blood tests for Betty today and CAT > >> scan as soon as the hospital arranges it.Betty signed do not revive [quoted text clipped - 48 lines] > So that's an update for now > Gordo My Warmest Hugs Gordo. It's a very difficult time for you both, I hope that the steroids reduce the pressure and rally Betty back to you for a while yet. Warm Hugs Alayne My family and I said our final farewell to Betty yesterday at her funeral in Campbell RIver BC. .I quit posting when I set up shop in St Joe's hospital about 40 days ago and I stayed by the bedside until she passed away on Friday.I am grateful for pain control and I think that Betty was spared lots of pain but traded it for lucidity.On her last night my eldest daughter crawled into bed with her and hugged her all night until moments before she breathed her last..Thanks to everyone who helped in the newsgroup.The health care that Betty received in St Joe's hospital Comox BC Canada was exceptional .Everyone including the cleaning staff and kitchen staff were part of the nursing team that helped Betty through her final days.Contracting out and privatizing is a terrible step backward for hospitals that enjoy socialized medicine .This is not the newsgroup for such discussions but I am so thankful that my wife of 50 years was able to get the best of care and that I was able to devote my time to her until the end instead of worrying how I was going to pay for everything.God bless you all in this group and I will check in from time to time Gordo > My family and I said our final farewell to Betty yesterday at her > funeral in Campbell RIver BC. [quoted text clipped - 15 lines] > check in from time to time > Gordo Hello Gordo, I'm sorry to hear that Betty has lost her battle and my heart goes out to you at this difficult time. Betty has now found peace and I'm sure that your many memories of your time together will bring you comfort. Warm Hugs to you Alayne > My family and I said our final farewell to Betty yesterday at her > funeral in Campbell RIver BC. [quoted text clipped - 15 lines] > check in from time to time > Gordo I'm so sorry to hear that Betty's gone, Gordo. But comforted to know that she was well cared for and passed peacefully surrrounded by love. We're here for you too, Gordo, anytime. Take care of you. J > It's time. There's been so many missing members.. > Please check in and let us know how you're doing. [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] > > J Hi everyone. Im still here reading the group. Have decided to stop chemotherapy all together. Quality of life won that debate. Sam still around and kicking. DX 5/04 chemo ever since. cisplatin/irinotecan- 8 mos. good results. irinotecan only- 2 mos. no good. gemcitabine/navelbine- 1 month. CT next month. still PS 0. wray > still around and kicking. > DX 5/04 [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > gemcitabine/navelbine- 1 month. CT next month. > still PS 0. Good luck, wray. Keep in touch and thanks for posting and your contributions here. J > It's time. There's been so many missing members.. > Please check in and let us know how you're doing. Bob's History Dx SCLC May 29,2003 Carboplatin&VP-16 6 rounds 3 week cycle Concurrent RT to chest Transfusion 2 units July 15 2003 Transfusion 2 units date unknown NED October 20,2003 Mets in cerebellum January 13,2004 Whole Brain Radiation NED January 22,2004 NED April 23, 2004 NED July 26,2004 Mets to brain Nov 4, 2004 Referred to Stanford Nov 10, 2004 CyberKnife Treatment Nov 16, 2004 http://www.stanfordhospital.com/clinicsmedServices/COE/cyberknife/ckHome.htm l Brain MRI Jan 7 2005 NED Jan 10, 2005 Next CT/MRI April 8, 2005  SignatureMy software never has bugs. It just develops random features. Bob In Carmel, CA > Bob's History > Dx SCLC May 29,2003 [quoted text clipped - 14 lines] > NED Jan 10, 2005 > Next CT/MRI April 8, 2005 Gad Bob, I'm sorry I missed you on the roll call. (long story about how Netscape crapped out on me and I had to subscribe to each newsgroup, twice daily, takes forever on dialup to download all the posts until I finally figured out and fixed the problem, Friday). Thanks for being here and answering the roll call. Keep in touch. I like to hear from you. J 54yr old DX Jume 2002 Stage 0 jumped suddenly to Stage 1 2003 1 month afer onc said go away for 12 mths. It is now in remission 18mths after 4 rounds of FCR. Arm and neck lymph nodes touchy but all blood work stable at normal so waiting and watching and lurker here and at leukemia sites. Best luck to u all Tony > 54yr old > DX Jume 2002 Stage 0 jumped suddenly to Stage 1 2003 1 month afer onc said > go away for 12 mths. It is now in remission 18mths after 4 rounds of FCR. > > Arm and neck lymph nodes touchy but all blood work stable at normal so > waiting and watching and lurker here and at leukemia sites. Thank you Tony, It's wonderful to see the word "remission". Thanks for your participation here - much appreciated. J- hoping that will continue Hi All, Checking in. Thank you for the Roll Call, J. I have Stage 4 Colorectal cancer mets in liver and lungs. Radiation and 5FU to shrink the mass before the first surgery, removal of the lower colon and anus as well as several chunks of liver - clean margins on all tissue removed. 10 rounds of chemo using 5FU, Oxaliplaten, and Avastin. Second surgery removed several more pieces of liver and gallbladder, it was just full of rocks. Well my latest CT scan showed some spots the radiologist called lesions, in the 5 to 9 mm range. CEA is still down in the 1.1 range. My Onc., who is NOT an Optimist said that it was a real stretch to call the areas of concern cancer, especially since I had some congestion the day of the CT scan. She wants to keep and eye on it and see what develops in the next 3 months, and I can live with that. We will re-stage in 3 more months. My Onc finally let me go back to work with a light duty work release, I was one happy guy. Everyone at work treated me like some conquering hero, my two bosses got on either side of me and held my hands up in victory. It was really nice. I also got to do some original work using a new program I found to do a surface analysis and save my company some money. Pretty nice to pull a rabbit out of the hat the first week back. My peripheral neurapathy is resolving itself and my memory and mental functions are getting better as time goes on. I've been taking Emergen-c and a simple calcium & magnesium supplement, I've experimented with one or the other or just the multi-vitamin I take, and both have to be there to reduce the symptoms. My Onc says to keep taking whatever works, and she is trying it in some other patients with mixed success. Life at home is going well, and things seem to be getting a little more normal, whatever that is, each day. It was really nice to be able to go back to work, nicer to be made welcome, and even nicer to make a contribution folks could see right then. Best to you all, Keep up the good fight. George > I have Stage 4 Colorectal cancer mets in liver and lungs. Radiation and 5FU > to shrink the mass before the first surgery, removal of the lower colon and [quoted text clipped - 28 lines] > back to work, nicer to be made welcome, and even nicer to make a contribution > folks could see right then. George, I wish you could see my smile, when I read your post. Thumbs up ! So pleased to read the good news. Kudos for developing a way for the company to save money. Thank you for answering the roll call, George, and best wishes for continuing positive reports. J > Hi All, > [quoted text clipped - 36 lines] > > George Good for you George, long may your good news continue. Warm Hugs Alayne I'm replying on behalf of Jill. She emailed me earlier this week. Those who'll remember. She's had her (I think 5th) neck surgery; this one was to remove many lymph nodes. She seems to be doing okay. At last word her FIL was near the end of his cancer journey, but she didn't update me this time. Her absence is partly due to trying to find a free newsever. I told her to get with the program and pay the annual $15.00 for news.individual.net. Hopefully she'll be back with us soon, because she's also a wonderful supporter here. That's the update, so now those who were wondering, know where Jillie is. J > I'm replying on behalf of Jill. > She emailed me earlier this week. [quoted text clipped - 15 lines] > That's the update, so now those who were wondering, know where Jillie is. > J J, Thanks for the update, can you give Jill my love and a great big Hug from me please. Hugs Alayne > "J" <aware@example.org> wrote in message > [quoted text clipped - 13 lines] > Thanks for the update, can you give Jill my love and a great big Hug from me > please. Will do, hon. Hopefully she'll be here soon and you can tell her yourself too. Hugs J aware@example.org said... > Her absence is partly due to trying to find a free newsever. > I told her to get with the program and pay the annual $15.00 for > news.individual.net. news.aioe.net - no registration; just point your newsreader at it and you're away. The only real downside is that if you're anything other than a light user of newsgroups it'll be a pain as there's a limit on the number of posts you can send in a day and I think it's something silly like 25. SignatureIf you can keep your head when all around are losing theirs... then you've failed to grasp some important aspect of the situation. emily@privacy.net said... > news.aioe.net Oops, it's news.aioe.org, not 'net'. Sorry. SignatureIf you can keep your head when all around are losing theirs... then you've failed to grasp some important aspect of the situation. > emily@privacy.net said... > > Oops, it's news.aioe.org, not 'net'. Sorry. Thanks Emily. Relayed it to Jill J >> emily@privacy.net said... >> >> Oops, it's news.aioe.org, not 'net'. Sorry. > > Thanks Emily. Relayed it to Jill > J J, Emily & Alayne, What would I do without you all. It's good to be back. And thank you, for thinking of me. Things in my world, just a little crazy lately. Okay, crazy would be nice. FIL is still hanging in there. Have been working on a lot of things for him that he can't do. So he sits in the shop and keeps us in line.<g> His pain is getting worse and can't seem to sleep through the night and his blood sugar has been giving him problems. He has start talking about his time coming soon. I pray that he goes peacefully in his sleep, and the good Lord takes him before he has to suffer much more. Hubby and Dad had a chance to tell each other things they were putting off saying. So that was a good thing. Well I'm still in PT 3 times a week. The therapist fouund a lump under my right arm pit last Thursday, so I called the Doc and they moved my scans from the 26th of this month, to tomarrow.( I'm sure I broke a dozen grammer rule's on that) Well in the morning. Another lump has appeared between my shoulder and the shoulder blade. I've had the cancer in my neck, affect the lymph nodes in my armpit, so I'm not shocked. So I geuss I'll know maybe by Friday if the cancer has returned. But we will deal with that then. I'm not going to waste these wonderful warm days we had sitting around moping about it. Big Jill Hugs to you all. > What would I do without you all. It's good to be back. And thank you, for > thinking of me. Things in my world, just a little crazy lately. Okay, crazy [quoted text clipped - 16 lines] > days we had sitting around moping about it. > Big Jill Hugs to you all. Hooray ! Jill's back :-) But please don't waste that precious time with us. Take care of you and your FIL. We're here if you need us. ( ( ( Jill, Randy and FIL ) ) ) J PS J's wondering if the massage is moving the lymphedema elsewhere in your system, like the armpits. Hoping that's what it is and not spread of the cancer. >> What would I do without you all. It's good to be back. And thank you, for >> thinking of me. Things in my world, just a little crazy lately. Okay, [quoted text clipped - 36 lines] > system, like the armpits. > Hoping that's what it is and not spread of the cancer. My Sweet J, My time with you and everyone here is never wasted, it's a blessing. Thanks for answering my e-mail and sending me Emily's post. I'll sure pass the hugs onto the hubby and FIL. The PT was sure it wasn't a muscle under the armpit, and didn't know for sure about the shoulder and didn't want to chance it. Of course I'm her favorite client, so she takes good care of me.<g> So I'm hoping to know something by Friday. Thanks for being there for me. If I can ever return the favor, I got your back Sister. Jill hugging J, hard... > My time with you and everyone here is never wasted, it's a blessing. Thanks > for answering my e-mail and sending me Emily's post. I'll sure pass the hugs [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > favorite client, so she takes good care of me.<g> > So I'm hoping to know something by Friday. HI Jill, Misunderstanding. I was thinking that maybe massaging the neck could cause the lymph fluid in the neck to migrate to the armpit area. I sure hope it's something benign like that. You've sure got enough on your plate at the mo. Good luck on friday. Thinking of you, your FIl and Randy, Hugs to Jillie. J >> My time with you and everyone here is never wasted, it's a blessing. >> Thanks [quoted text clipped - 17 lines] > Hugs to Jillie. > J Thanks J. Hugs.... Jill > J, Emily & Alayne, > What would I do without you all. It's good to be back. And thank you, for [quoted text clipped - 17 lines] > days we had sitting around moping about it. > Big Jill Hugs to you all. Hey Jill, good to hear from you; the 'sisters' start to fret if it's been a while ;-) I'm sorry to hear that your FIL has sleep/pain probs. but really pleased to read that he and Hubby have resolved some issues, it can be tricky to face but sure eases the burden in the future. Have you read the crossing the creek link that J gave a while ago, I read it when facing losing Tony and it certainly put at bay a lot of my anxieties. I hope that the scan proves the lumps to be "innocent"; but know that we are always here should you need us. Enjoy the warm weather Jill, a little sunshine is good for the soul. Warm Hugs Alayne >> J, Emily & Alayne, >> What would I do without you all. It's good to be back. And thank you, for [quoted text clipped - 49 lines] > > Alayne Alayne Sweetie you do this old heart good. I haven't read crossing the creek, but I should. I do not fear death as some people might. I know there will come a day for all of us .And the good Lord has promised me a new body. And I sure need it, Amen Sister.<g> Hubby on the other hand hasn't wanted to face what will come, till just recently. We all have to deal with it, in our own way and at our own speed. If we didn't love, it wouldn't hurt. And of course you understand more than most. Well I hope the lump is nothing, I don't think my beloved hubby could take one more thing. He has been so worried, all undercover he thinks. So as not to make me worry. It's amazing how close we have always been, even when we disagree. I'm so lucky. Big warm Jilly hugs right back at you. > > Hey Jill, good to hear from you; the 'sisters' start to fret if it's been > > a [quoted text clipped - 31 lines] > disagree. I'm so lucky. > Big warm Jilly hugs right back at you. I sure didn't mean that you read crossing the creek for your circumstances Jill, you're not going anywhere, I meant to allay any fears that you may build up with regards to your FIL. Most people build up a scenario involving a lot of pain, but from my own experience, this certainly was not the case. I also understand why hubby doesn't want to face things, boy, was I guilty of that ;-) but I am sure that he has an untapped inner source of strength (you just don't know this yet ;-) and hopefully it won't need to be tapped for a long while to come. I'm glad that you are sharing a closeness with each other right now, it's a deep sense of loving and being loved and it's what the world is all about at the end of the day. So yes, honey you are lucky, but hubby is lucky too. Warm Hugs Alayne > I sure didn't mean that you read crossing the creek for your circumstances > Jill, you're not going anywhere, I meant to allay any fears that you may [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] > deep sense of loving and being loved and it's what the world is all about at > the end of the day. So yes, honey you are lucky, but hubby is lucky too. Seconded and warm hugs to all in this thread. J >> > Hey Jill, good to hear from you; the 'sisters' start to fret if it's > been [quoted text clipped - 66 lines] > > Alayne Alayne I don't want you to think I miss understood you. I should read crossing the creek for FIL. it's hard to be on both sides of the fence. Dealing with cancer and then to deal with someone you love having cancer. I kow there are some on this NG dealing with the same thing. The hubby has a lot of strength, and I know that. But he thinks he can't make it, if something happens. I try to make him believe thing will work out. Because I know they will. It's harder for me to watch him suffer through all of this, than it is for me to deal with my cancer. And I believe there is a reason for everything. The hubby asked me one day why I believe that me having cancer had a purpose. I told him maybe it was to help your Dad through his cancer and to give all of them a better understanding of what a person can go through. And just when I think I can't take anymore, I find I can. I throw myself a pity party every now and then. But someone's love always gets me through it. One big hard hug coming at you. Jill > Alayne I don't want you to think I miss understood you. I should read > crossing the creek for FIL. it's hard to be on both sides of the fence. > Dealing with cancer and then to deal with someone you love having cancer. > I kow there are some on this NG dealing with the same thing. I cannot possibly imagine how hard things must be from both sides of the face; to deal with two such major crisis at the same time is mind-blowing and I have such admiration for people such as yourself Jill. > The hubby has a lot of strength, and I know that. But he thinks he can't > make it, if something happens. I try to make him believe thing will work [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] > Dad through his cancer and to give all of them a better understanding of > what a person can go through. It's human nature to fear the unknown, but it is also human nature to continue with life no matter what it throws at us (although alas not necessarily medically) and your hubby will pull through it eventually. When Tony was nearing the end, there was no way that I could see the light at the end of the tunnel; I felt that we were two parts of one unit (bit cliche but "soul mates") and therefore I wouldn't have a hope in hell of being able to carry on as only one half. But here I am, nearing 19 months later and the ole Alayne spark returns. Life isn't the same, obviously, but on a different plateau. I'd like to think that there was some purpose or reasoning behind a cancer diagnosis. I suppose it rattles the humans cage a bit, and makes us realise that we are not the invincible creatures that walk the earth that we think we are. Mother Nature is the only one allowed to wear that crown. But from my own experience, I feel that my life has been "enriched" and touched by the compassion that shines through. I'd heard the phrase "life's too short"; "you only get one shot" etc. etc. and it never really meant much; now it does. > And just when I think I can't take anymore, I find I can. I throw myself a > pity party every now and then. But someone's love always gets me through it. > One big hard hug coming at you. > Jill There's nothing wrong with throwing a pity party Jill; I am sure it is good for the soul, like an inner cleansing of negative thoughts, that once dealt with can then be got over. Trouble comes when people keep the pity locked inside. I've promised myself that one day, when the girls have flown the nest, I am going to climb the biggest hill I can find (might have to travel, bit flat around here) and scream my little socks off! Warm Hugs to you now Jill and one too for Hubby Alayne >> Alayne I don't want you to think I miss understood you. I should read >> crossing the creek for FIL. it's hard to be on both sides of the fence. [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] > face; to deal with two such major crisis at the same time is mind-blowing > and I have such admiration for people such as yourself Jill. And I you. >> The hubby has a lot of strength, and I know that. But he thinks he can't >> make it, if something happens. I try to make him believe thing will work [quoted text clipped - 31 lines] > short"; "you only get one shot" etc. etc. and it never really meant much; > now it does. I understand, my hubby is my soul mate. And I'm so very glad your here with us to share your life experience, love and compassion. Your the air in my flat tire.<g> I'm sorry you had to come to the NG, for your beloved Tony. But I'm greatful that he brought you to my doorstep. >> And just when I think I can't take anymore, I find I can. I throw myself >> a [quoted text clipped - 16 lines] > > Alayne And if you have room, I'd would just join you on that hill. That way I have someone to drag me up!<g> "Trouble comes when people keep the pity locked inside." How right you are. I would have never looked at it that way. I like that. Thank You Alayne. When I give the hubby that extra hug and he asks '"whats that for, I grin and chuckle and say that's from Al. ((((Alayne & Girls)))) Jill > >> Alayne I don't want you to think I miss understood you. I should read > >> crossing the creek for FIL. it's hard to be on both sides of the fence. [quoted text clipped - 47 lines] > flat tire.<g> I'm sorry you had to come to the NG, for your beloved Tony. > But I'm greatful that he brought you to my doorstep. That's a cool expression Jill, thank you, you say the nicest things ;-) I'm sorry I had to come here too but if I hadn't then I would still be ploughing through a mundane life without fully understanding what it really is all about; and I wouldn't have "met" you :-) > >> And just when I think I can't take anymore, I find I can. I throw myself > >> a [quoted text clipped - 26 lines] > ((((Alayne & Girls)))) > Jill Okay Jill, I'll make you a promise now; when the time is right and I find my hill, I'll visualise you there with me, I might even take a bottle of plonk with me and a few choccies to share. Glad that hubby liked the Hug, just as well it was all I sent then ;-) Big Fat Hugs Alayne > Well I'm still in PT 3 times a week. The therapist fouund a lump under my > right arm pit last Thursday, so I called the Doc and they moved my scans [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > lymph nodes in my armpit, so I'm not shocked. So I geuss I'll know maybe by > Friday if the cancer has returned. Hugs Jill. Any news? J - thinking of you >> Well I'm still in PT 3 times a week. The therapist fouund a lump under my >> right arm pit last Thursday, so I called the Doc and they moved my scans [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] > Any news? > J - thinking of you J, Doctor should call back tomarrow. Said nothing showed up on the test, but the want to go ahead and do a biopsy. Lump is still there and having some moderate pain in that side of my breast. Since the test do not always show what they are looking for, this is the best way to tell for sure. Not looking forward to this surgery. Just when I'm starting to feel human. The upside is I'm still having PT, 3 times a week and should be in a little better shape. Hugs, Jill > Doctor should call back tomarrow. Said nothing showed up on the test, but > the want to go ahead and do a biopsy. Lump is still there and having some [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > The upside is I'm still having PT, 3 times a week and should be in a little > better shape. Jillie, sis, when was your last mammogram and chest x-ray? Hugs J > Doctor should call back tomarrow. Said nothing showed up on the test, but > the want to go ahead and do a biopsy. Lump is still there and having some > moderate pain in that side of my breast. Since the test do not always show > what they are looking for, this is the best way to tell for sure. Not > looking forward to this surgery. Just when I'm starting to feel human. Jill, have you checked with acor or BJ's list if others have had same issues? And how their's were addressed? I highly recommend that you compare notes with others who've been there, done that. http://www.wisc.edu/wolberg/lymph.html WHAT IS LYMPH NODE SAMPLING? Some of the lymph nodes under the arm (axillary) drain the breast, but others drain the arm and back. When all the axillary nodes are removed, the drainage to the arm is disturbed. In order the preserve as much arm drainage as possible, only some of the node may be removed...sampled. This can be done with guidance from radioactive materials, dyes, or anatomically. Sampling may miss cancer-containing lymph nodes, but this probably does not affect survival. However, additional surgery may be necessary if the nodes become enlarged and can be felt on physical examination. There's a picture here with a lymph node and arrows.http://www.emedicine.com/med/topic2722.htm Can you ask him if he's reasonably sure that removing it won't cause another one to flare up elsewhere. And the risk of (arm) lymphedema? I wish I knew the answers to this uncomfortable dilemna. I don't know which imaging is done for soft tissue thyroid mets in the chest, breast or back. (so "hold" the mammogram and x-ray question/idea). I wonder if Peter Moran or Steph knows? Hugs J |
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