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Medical Forum / Diseases and Disorders / Breast Cancer / March 2005Hi im new here
Hi everyone I come from hull uk and I want to chat to others not far from me. I feel so alone and I have no support from family and friends at all so I want to make new friends. I find i am isolating myself due to this cause I have no one coming to see me or even phoning me. I want to get out the house but have no where to go I don't even have one friend I can call round to see when im low and have a coffee and a chat. I have also recently lost my job due to breast cancer and now I have to find another job too. My life seems to have changed so much and im desperate to change it but I find it hard to make new friends because they don't understand me and what im going through. I just don't know what to do to change it when you try to say how you feel but get ignored. Sorry For rambling on but I needed to tell you all how this is making me feel im just grateful i have an supportive partner and a little girl to get me through each day but it would be great to have friends too, someone you can have a laugh with and also I would love a social life again. My life has been turned upside down with this and my emotions are all over the place. hugs to all here Sheldon x > Hi everyone I come from hull uk and I want to chat to others not far > from me. I feel so alone and I have no support from family and friends [quoted text clipped - 15 lines] > hugs to all here > Sheldon x Sorry to hear about your troubles. Welcome to the group. It is a common problem that cancer isolates you, people who haven't been there are embarrassed to talk about it, and don't know what to say to someone that has it. How old is your little girl? My own daughter was six when my wife had breast cancer, now she is 11 and doing great, (and I hope she is getting ready for school right now, we should be going in five minutes) You will find that the writers on this group are pretty well spaced out physically, most are of course American, but we have a vociferous British contingent and representation from several other countries too, and somebody did mention being treated in Hull recently.  SignatureTim Jackson -Who needs to pay Microsoft? Free Open Source Software- www.mozilla.org FIREFOX Web Browser, THUNDERBIRD Email/News www.openoffice.org Office Suite I second Tim's welcome. Most of the posters here have gone through their own battles with this disease. We're a pretty open bunch, so feel free to ask anything that's on your mind. True, for most of us this is a pretty emotional thing. I actually went numb for about a whole year - from the time I heard the diagnosis until most of my surgeries were done. Guess that was my lame way of coping. Looking forward to gettting to know you. Take care. ...lisa (in Massachusetts) If you have a Breast Care Nurse she'll probably be able to tell you about local support groups, there usually are some. If you ever come to Leeds I'd be very happy to see you. I'm one of the 'vociferous British contingent' mentioned by Tim. He knows, he's met me:-) Mail me. Mary > "sheldon" <sheldon1968@hotmail.co.uk> wrote in message > Hi, I attend Hull clinic, and they're brill... you will have been allocated a breast care nurse, all the ones I've met are really friendly and they have a room off the waiting room where you can pop in for a cuppa and a biscuit usually people in there ready and keen to chat, Only shown it the other day (My chemo awareness day) the chemo nurse said we can pop in any time, not just when we attend... too far for me, I'm on the South bank... but you may be able to get easily? It's at the Princess Royal Hospital on Saltshouse road... Hope this helps..... Good luck xx Hi Pam I go to see my oncoligist at Princess Royal Hospital Hull. I would love to pop in to chat with others but It is a distance for me. I just need a kick I think I have found that due to the way people are towards me im isolting myself and I really need to do something. I would love to meet you sometime. Have you got the details of someone i can speak to there. I run my own support group for breast cancer on the net my partner set it up for mebut would be nice to chat with others face to face. Thankyou take care Sheldon x > Hi Pam I go to see my oncoligist at Princess Royal Hospital Hull. I > would love to pop in to chat with others but It is a distance for me. I [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > > Thankyou take care Sheldon x Hi, Sheldon You sound quite low... but must be positive to set up a support group....Did you get a breast care nurse? Speak to her. she will tell you who to contact... I'm there again on Thursday morning for my 2nd chemo session... how are your friends treating you? mine are just the same except for pulling my leg about hair loss and absent mindedness which I put down to chemo-brain and they put down to being my normal self (age) Most are the same as usual but get embarrassed if they happen to say something sensitive.... I just laugh... I've put my foot in my mouth often enough in the past, to feel empathy with them..... hope you are feeling better, good wishes, Pam xx > Hi everyone Hi, Sheldon, Welcome to the group. It's a good bunch, even though we all wish no one had need to join a BC group! I second Mary's suggestion about joining an in-person support group. I'm in the US, but have found my support group helpful. It's nice to talk in person with people who understand and can talk openly and unconstrainedly about BC. Being survivors, they just "get it". I have to admit, I didn't enjoy my first visit -- felt uncomfortable, like I didn't have much in common with other members -- but I convinced myself to give it another try, and then began to relax and feel more at home there. I've since made some good friends in my group, whom I see outside the group. Good luck with your efforts to find a good path through this difficult territory . . . you're making a good start. Ann T. Remove 'dontsendspam' from address to reply by email > I second Mary's suggestion about joining an in-person support group. ... > I have to admit, I didn't enjoy my first visit -- felt uncomfortable, like > I didn't have much in common with other members -- I've never been a good member of them either (although I have attended quite often) - but I know that I'm in the minority (I'm an okkard bugger in case that hasn't come across) and that most patients enjoy the social side, the rapport, the exchanging of ideas and the like. We're all different with different needs, I didn't feel lonely or any different from how I'd been before my diagnosis and treatment but I can thoroughly recommend support groups for those who feel that their lives have changed. And, as I've said probably ad nauseam, this particular group is the best thing I know! Mary Mary |
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