Medical Forum / Diseases and Disorders / Asthma / October 2005
Social Isolation
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Beccah - 13 Oct 2005 17:27 GMT I've just joined this group, and would like to know how some of you tolerate the social isolation?
For instance, we can see friends that have cats or non-hypoallergenic dogs, birds, etc., (even my daughter's house is out of limits for me because of cats). Also those with heavy cologne's cause my asthma to flare up. If we go to a movie or out to eat, we often have to move OR sometimes even have to LEAVE because of "Murphy's Law" bringing the strongest cologne person(s) to a seat near by. Fumes in parking lots and on streets are even a problem related to visiting public places in general.
The social isolation is really getting to me.
I appreciate any comments others may want to make on this problem.
Blessings, Beccah
Beccah - 13 Oct 2005 17:29 GMT OOPS...I should have typed:
we CAN'T see friends that have cats or non-hypoallergenic dogs, birds, etc.
Teri M - 13 Oct 2005 21:00 GMT Hello there! I understand what you mean by isolation socially!! I am allergic to cats, and of course alot of my friends have a cat or even some have like 4 or 5 cats. What I always try to do, his take allergy medicine before my arrival. It helps most of the time, except if the house is real bad with cat dander, then it doesnt work out so well, and I always have to sit outside or leave early. It can be a horrible inconvenience and very frustrating!! Try to also take your asthma medication before going also, see if that works. Good luck!!!
>I've just joined this group, and would like to know how some of you >tolerate the social isolation? [quoted text clipped - 14 lines] >Blessings, >Beccah Nancy - 14 Oct 2005 04:03 GMT > I've just joined this group, and would like to know how some of you > tolerate the social isolation? [quoted text clipped - 14 lines] > Blessings, > Beccah Hiya -
Yes, it can be hard. I'm allergic to just about any animal there is, except maybe snakes and fish. My friends and family understand and they come to me, or we meet somewhere neutral like a restaurant ect. At my worst, I was so bad that the animal hair on their clothes would set me off, and again, I was lucky that they understood and they would get dressed moments before they left.
One thing to make sure of, if you need people to take you seriously about your illness, you have to take it seriously. You have to say "I'm sorry, I can't go there, I hope you understand". When people really see that you will have to miss an occasion to take care of your health, they will take you seriously. I had someone not believe me about the seriousness of my asthma, and they told me that they didn't have a cat. I got sick within 5 minutes of being there and ended up in the ER. That, I can tell you, never happened again.
In restaurants and movies, don't feel obligated to sit where you are. Ask to be moved if you need to be. It can be done with a minimum of fuss and works out better for you.
Hope this helps!
Life is uncertain..........eat dessert first!!
Nancy 8=: )
Joe Gill - 15 Oct 2005 22:46 GMT > I've just joined this group, and would like to know how some of you > tolerate the social isolation? [quoted text clipped - 11 lines] > > I appreciate any comments others may want to make on this problem. First of all welcome to the group....
Second, before I make other comments, let me say that I am allergic to cat dander, dog dander, horse dander, molds, and ALL sorts of indoor stuff.. Some of the allergies are worse than others.....
Third, I am allergic to all sorts of foods in one form or another... Some just showed up on a skin test years ago and really don't bother me... all the ways to peanuts where a piece of a peanut the size of an 'o' in this note could cause a SEVERE reaction for me.
Fourth, to put things in perspective, I have had allergies for about 40 years and the asthma that is triggered by them.....
All that said, you have to at some time in your life make a decision NOT to let allergies/asthma make the decisions in your life. You have to work with your GP/Allergist/whatever.. I did camping/boy scouts /weekend camping.... There were 'pills' for the exposure
I am 'paranoid' however about exposure to peanuts and carry and Epipen.
As for cats / dogs ... I visit the people with them, and use medication, sometime I take it before or sometimes I take it when I am just at the point that I am ready to claw my eyes out they are itching so bad or my throat is getting raspy...
If certain other items bother me like trays of nuts at a party, I just carefully move myself.....
It just take some effort on one's part to take compensating efforts....
It all about attitude toward the allergies....
NorthShoreCEO - 16 Oct 2005 15:32 GMT > I've just joined this group, and would like to know how some of > you [quoted text clipped - 23 lines] > Blessings, > Beccah I've been thinking about this since you posted, and it took me a while to remember exactly what bugged me most about this when I had asthma.
I had allergies that got worse and worse over the years, but one of them always triggered really awful asthma attacks that left me feeling sick for days, and that was my allergy to cats. The bad thing was, I had in-laws living in New Jersey who had cats and friends who had cats. The first time I visited my in-laws, they were very offended that we weren't going to stay with them, but were going to a hotel. They insisted that they were very clean, had vacuumed all the floors and furniture and window treatments and vents, and would put the cats in the basement while we were there. (why do people not GET that the dander stays put deep within carpeting and upholstery and a vacuum won't help?) We went for a few hours the first day and I ended up so asthmatic that when my regular asthma meds wouldn't work (and I walked into their house tanked up on those AND allergy meds in the first place), it freaked my husband (at the time) out and we ended up in the emergency room. The next day he called and said we couldn't come over and he explained why, and my in-laws said we should come over and they'd open all the windows. (another grasping at straws notion people who don't get it suggest) I said, "Fine, let's try it." Bad idea. That was the last time I went into their home. We'd still go out there, but we'd meet up in a restaurant or some other place. Sadly, my f-i-l passed away while ex and I were separated, and my m-i-l passed away earlier this year. They were wonderful people, and we had a great relationship, even after the split. However, they were among a group of people who just didn't understand what asthmatics go through.
When my friends with cats entertained at home, I wouldn't go. At first, I felt left out, but after a while I realized I'd rather not feel sick for three days than to go to a place that I wouldn't really enjoy after the first thirty minutes anyway, because my eyes would be watering, and I'd be sneezing and wheezing.
And then there was my aunt who insisted when I was a teen that asthma was psychological and I was doing it to get attention. She held firm to that belief, too, until her daughter (two years younger than I), was diagnosed with asthma as a teen. One of those God smack, karma thingies. ;-)
I don't have asthma anymore, mine was caused by bacteria and once that was treated, the asthma took a hike and the allergies went from severe to mild ....HOWEVER....I still don't know if I'm just as allergic to cats as I once was, because I no longer know people with cats.
Your reaction to strong fumes is interesting, and leads me to ask if you were just diagnosed with asthma?
Merlin - 17 Oct 2005 06:11 GMT G'day Beccah, quite obviously you are new to this kind of problem, and quite obviously you have substantial sensitivity which is currently controlling your life. I would suggest you begin the exercise at your home, this needs to be classed as your territory. Anything in the home or anyone entering the home need to obey specific laws, there is no relaxing this aspect. This begins with anything aromatic, any chemical, any animal, any dusty product or anything you deem that may cause you a problem. This is absolutely important, and provides a place of safety for you. (after it is carefully examined) Never let anyone in your home past the front door unless they test acceptable as far as scent or aromatics go. Rigourously enforce this rule, people soon learn and accept your circumstance, relax it and you will pay dearly. It would be adviseable to undertake a desensitisation method of some description to try to reduce your dependence on any drug support. You need to become significantly more observant, especially when ever you go out anywhere, or are present near disgustingly fuming persons wearing ridiculous colognes etc. It is a good idea to make it known that their substances are likely to kill someone with an asthmatic problem, most of these kinds of people are absolute morons. (standard answer being "duh"!) If you enter a restaurant or whatever always observe where the aircon outlets are and sit nearest as to not have problems from others. The same applies on transport and any location in any building, this takes a while to learn. Even walking down a busy street, walk on the upwind side this reduces vehicle pollution effect. When you refuell your vehicle observe the wind direction and select a bowser best suited to allow you clear air. Do not tolerate substance exposure unless it is absolutely neccessary, it is a mistake to suffer any exposure whatsoever because it is substantially difficult to reverse the effect, a few minutes exposure may take days to overcome it's effect. You need to understand the buteyko breathing principle, essentially the ability to maximise any air breathed and develop an ability to breathe sparingly in contaminated conditions. This particular ability is substantially helpful especially in supermarkets and places like that. It does not include any deep breathing and any breathing should always be through the nose.
With regard to exposure in relatives homes and that kind of thing, excuse yourself and avoid it. Cat dander effects (especially) can take years to abate in homes. Anyone having sensitivity problems and suffering asthma that is able to overcome the asthmatic element normally never fully overcome the major problem sensitivities, the degree of everlasting effect is obviously dependent on the period they have had their problem. With regard to attending theatres and public places where close public mingling and rebreathing others air is unavoidable, expect to suffer with any contained respiratory illness, the worst description of this is long-distance el-cheapo airlines.
In keeping with your problem description you would understand that you catch anything that is going around to a worse degree than others, you would also likely have an antibiotic useage rate beyond any normal expectation.
It would be in your interest to consider regular probiotic use, and also google "Gary Huffnagle" to learn and understand some of the reason for your problem.
Cheers, Merlin.
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