HEllo!!  well your girlfriend probably doesnt wanna talk about it, cause her
asthma does interfere with her daily life, and its frustrating to her.  I
have severe asthma and i gotta say, it does interfere with the intimate , sex
stuff.  not always, but often.  I always try to take my meds before hand,
maybe she isnt cause she is embarrased about the asthma, and doesnt wanna
take the meds in front of you??  just a guess.  asthma can be very
inconvenient and troublesome!!  what medications is she on,? maybe she needs
to check with her doctor to  make sure its controlled properly.  Bear with
her, and support her, asthma can be a real pain in the butt!!!

It sounds like your girlfriend isn't really ready to be intimate.  My
advice would be to develop trust in your relationship to the point
where she can talk about it.  Then have the discussion about how well
her asthma is being controlled.  There may be other issues as well,
such as the length of your relationship and both your past histories,
etc.  Time and devotion will bring you closer to the intimacy you
seek.

G'day Fattdonuts, I had to laugh when I read your account.
Over the years, apart from my own experience I have worked with at
least a half-dozen couples with this exact same kind of problem, it is
more common than you might imagine.
More often, one of the participants smother themself with scents of one
kind or another in places where they think or hope the other might
venture in one form or another for whatever reason.
The inciddence of a major event commonly ends up as an ER adventure and
a real lesson in life problems for one or the other.

Often when the situation is carefully examined, it becomes obvious that
more is involved than originally apparent.
The subject is usually a hard working and dilligent, decent kind of
person, has had asthma for considerable years, is not used to late
nights and really needs regular rest. If this is coupled with a few
alchoholic drinks, some food which may be different to their normal
kind of diet and some extra exercise such as a dance or whatever, then
apply the emotive factor, you can appreciate a primed situation of
heightened asthmatic possibility.
Now add the last ingredient of chemical effect from the anti-perspirant
and it is little wonder that an attack happens.
One identical circumstance actually ended in the death of a young man,
farmer, worked hard, played hard, just about to turn twentyone, going
home in his utility, long drive after a long night out, severe
asthmatic attack, you can imagine the rest of this tragic story so
please take the utmost care.

You must understand that your poor girl is most likely chemically
sensitive, most likely to one of your plastered scents, most likely a
chemical in your antiperspirant. She most likely would also be wearing
similar substances but probably a much less strength type learned from
previous experience. The combined concentration in a close situation is
obviously too much for her.
This being the case there will be a significant amount of other
sensitivity possibilities which will be problematic for the rest of her
life and which she most likely has already experienced.

So now let us consider the real circumstance here, she obviously has a
sensitivity that is being affected by the peripheral critereon, so it
is likely that this is going to be a life long problem for her and will
also have further repercussions for you if your intention is to remain
together, which is demonstrated by your querying post. Any children
from the union may also be susceptible if this is going to be a lasting
relationship these implications need to be understood.

Decide if you are going to continue with this liasion and any long term
consequences, consider the probable causes, is it worthwhile, check-out
the mother, the body format usually continues mother to daughter,
remember the dragon syndrome begins at marriage, is she worth the chase
given the future possible problems?

One young man really was smitten with the "in the cot" abilities of his
new girlfriend, she really became active after the first few minutes of
the union, clawing and tearing at his bared flesh, virtually frothing
at the mouth!! What a session!!!
It was later after she had collapsed beneath him that he called the ER
and discovered she had a severe asthmatic event, she was unable to
speak and had been trying to get away to get a breath, somewhat a
misinterpretation of body signals.

Maybe you are too well endowed and are scaring her, maybe the asthma is
being used as an excuse to avoid pain and suffering.

You will find that wearing no antiperspirants whatsoever will work
wonders, after your shower liberally plaster your under-arm areas with
"Isocol" (the scented alchohol) this will reduce bacterea which
produces body orour, and then ensure you wear a close fitting t-shirt
as an undergarment, this further helps to avoid body odour. The scent
from this product is clear.
Just these simple steps will produce enormous improvement in your
relationship, to be safe you might suggest she does the same.
Avoid getting this stuff in the crotch, it can really make you walk on
air.

If you manage to get her in the cot, ensure the area is clear air, no
chemical scents and the bedding is clear of aromatic scents from fabric
softeners etc.

By the way I was a chronic asthmatic it runs in my family, my current
wife's family also has a history of severe asthmatic problems, the
genetic problem has always existed for us, but understanding and
avoiding substances and circumstances has allowed normal lives for us
and our children, my problem is now instilling suitable intelligence
into our children's partners to ensure our grandchildren remain clear.
So you see there is more involved than might be initially apparent.

Best of luck, cheers, Merlin.

I used to have an asthma problem but a naturopathic doctor helped me
find out which food sensitivities were triggering my asthma. I got rid
of my asthma, eczema, and hayfever in one shot. Hayfever can be
triggered by a combination of airborne and food allergens.

Brad_Chad

My wild guess is that she isn't following her prescribed treatment
regimen and doesn't want to admit it.  If she tells you, who cares
about her, what lifestyle parameters and treatments she's supposed to
be following, you will likely insist that she comply.  That would
explain why her asthma is a more sensitive topic than sex.

Your girlfriend won't get asthma attacks during sex if she stops
hyperventilating.

Get her to breathe like she does during sex and you'll see she'll get
an asthma attack.  

Asthmatics are chronic hyperventilators.  That needs to be qualified
in cases of severe airway damage.   It is possible to reverse chronic
hyperventilation with certain forms of yoga, meditation, and
particularly with the Buteyko method.

Peter Kolb
Biomedical Engineer
pkolb@wt.com.au

pkolb@wt.com.au
___________________________________________________

Free information provided by grateful ex-asthmatics

   http://members.westnet.com.au/pkolb/buteyko.htm

__________________________________________________