Well my sister works in the garden department of her local Wal-Mart.  Just
to get out of the house.  And says otherwise she would likely kill her
spouse.  He's a nice guy and they get along great, but there is such a thing
as too much togetherness.

If you can get him out of the house at all, even to just go for a ride, it
would help you feel less trapped.  It you can't, then you have to find
things to do.

If you need to be home with him, then there is reading, knitting, the
computer, gardening, coffee with the neighbors, etc.  Extra long trips to
the grocery store.

If he is truly home bound, you might even consider placing him in respite
care for a few days once in a while and getting out of town.

May towns have Senior Centers that plan trips to gardens and wineries and
casinos and such.  He might be able to cope with that.

Also, get yourself into a caregivers support group so you will have someone
to talk to in a similar situation..

If he is keeping you awake you will have to make it clear that just because
he can't sleep doesn't mean you don't have to.

And get in to see the doctor yourself to make sure you aren't clinically
depressed in addition to being tired.  If you are treatment can make all the
difference in the world.

Jo

Hi Kathy,,,  I just wanted to say that having the feeling and worries you
have     is     normal.
   What kind of arthritis does your husband have and what does he take for
it?

Harv

hi kathy!  sounds like you have the time on your hands, but not the
opportunity to do more than you are doing.  i think i'd suggest that you
start making friends with neighbors and with other volunteers.  you could
use some girlfriends, girlfriend!  go out to lunch once in awhile with a
girlfriend.  also, this might set up a networking kind of thing for you, as
one of these friends might just know somebody who knows somebody who needs
somebody with your job skills.

if hubby can't go out, considering his condition and his meds, maybe
something like hosting a weekly or monthly cardgame/scrabblegame/boardgame
at your house, with another couple (maybe neighbors) might help both of you
have something to look forward to together.  make it pot luck or just after
dinnertime for dessert.

checking out the local senior centers has been mentioned, but there is also
county parks and recreation centers that have outings/daytrips you can go on
and classes in new and interesting things, not just hobbies, as well as
exercise programs.

if you do happen to be depressed, which would be normal and typical in a
situation like this, there are many effective ways of handling it.  there
are varying degrees of depression.  everybody's different and people find
different ways of coping and dealing with and facing situations like this.
however, the least effective thing to do, about it, is to do nothing.

hope there's an idea or two on this thread you can make use of, kathy.

kate

Except for the allergy to NSAIDs, you pretty much described
me.  I was diagnosed with AS in 1976-77.  Took up square
dancing for exercise until I had to stop driving.  During that
time I had a THR which eliminated the waking up every 1-2
hours.  Now I sleep through 6-8 hours and I've been back
to square dancing since 2001.

You didn't mention WHERE your husband's pain is.  Back?
Hips?  Shoulders?

You also didn't mention your location, so we may be able
to steer you to some suppost group(s).

In the meanwhile, you could visit http://www.kickas.org
and http://www.spondylitis.org.

... LET THERE BE DARK!    No, that's not right.