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Medical Forum / Diseases and Disorders / Arthritis / February 2008prayers needed
I have a friend who has a six year old daughter who's father gets weekend visitation twice a month. We found out this weekend that the child (can't do names here, guys) has been being not just molested but violently sexually assaulted for as much as two years. The dad threatened to kill the mom if the child told. We reported to CPS the next morning (I am a mandatory reporter and was the person the child started telling this whole story to.) We have been jumping through hoops for the last two days with no CPS interview, the sheriff's dep. basically telling the mother that kids fantasize and he wouldn't be to concerned. We took her to her pediatrician today and she has been repeatedly sexually assaulted-no ambiguity or doubt The pediatrician called CPS. Still nothing but disdain from the sheriff (my friends are all Santa Cruz PD, not sheriffs and they just don't have jurisdiction. We've have filed for an emergency TRO and it has not yet been granted. They are staying with me right now and I fear that they are in very grave danger. I have a friend who is retired special forces who is staying here with us but he can only stay here very short term. What I need are prayers that both mom and child will recover from this, and that we can keep the child away from the dad. I know this is s strange thing to bring to the group for prayer but normal channels are not working a all. My friend is a single mom who works as a hairdresser and barely makes ends meet and can't take her kid and go into hiding for an extended period of time. I just can't understand why our CPS dept won't even do an interview. We have been in contact with every group (survivors center womens crisis support, a women's center connected with the U that works with survivors. No one can figure out why the lack of concern. I am just feeling such a loss of respect for the system. We should be able to report, document, stop the offender and get on with the healing process. instead we are all just devestated by the lack of concern, the sexist langueage and attitudes they have all exibited. This is bot about me but I feel like I have been hit by a truck-I can't imagine how horrible my friend is feeling. There is just no help of hope here. Our CPS department refused to do an investigation a few years ago and two kids died from their lack of action. So prayers please to keep this baby girl alive and safe and then some healing would be nice. m Prayers being said, M. I don't understand the system either. It's supposed to protect people. Carole melinda, i'm stunned by the lack of response on the part of cps and all authorities given the evidence and clear threat to this mother and child. . .and i worry, to you as well, since they're with you. In the years i worked as a social worker in CA (san diego), i saw, if anything, an overreaction (if there is such a thing) on the part of CPS to keep kids sake. if anyone would know the channels to go through to get some action, it would be you. the only thought i have is contacting the closest children's hospital where there's a child abuse team. they have a lot of credibility and the constant ear of the police. meanwhile, prayers coming for this little girl. diane >Our CPS department refused to do an investigation a few years ago and >two kids died from their lack of action. > >So prayers please to keep this baby girl alive and safe and then some >healing would be nice. Oh my God, Melinda, how terrible. Here's hoping for a fast resolution to this. There is so much of this stuff that goes on. Joan M., Prayers being said and a candle being lit!!! . . . . Donna . . . . 1.) ANGELS EXIST, but some times, since they don't all have wings, we call them FRIENDS...... 2.) J.K.M.A. I'm stunned to hear that parts of this country are still so blatantly ignorant of how to handle a child sexual abuse report. The mother and child are definitely in my prayers, as well as the whole situation. The only other avenue i can think of is to call your elected state legislators. CPS is generally a state agency and a call to a higher up supervisor by a state senator might get some attention. For that matter, call the US legislators also. The more pressure put on CPS, the better.  SignatureNann remove the Gator cheer to email me Simply the thing I am shall make me live --- William Shakespeare Light A Candle Address:http://www.gratefulness.org/candles/view.cfm?l=eng&c=5424930 I lit a candle here at this site for this situation. I put my initials (dg) along with a group name of ASA if you would care to add on to it or create your own! . . . . Donna . . . . 1.) ANGELS EXIST, but some times, since they don't all have wings, we call them FRIENDS...... 2.) J.K.M.A. > Light A Candle > Address:http://www.gratefulness.org/candles/view.cfm?l=eng&c=5424930 > > I lit a candle here at this site for this situation. I put my initials > (dg) along with a group name of ASA if you would care to add on to it or > create your own! Thanks, Donna. I lit one and said a special prayer for them as well. Carole > Light A Candle > Address:http://www.gratefulness.org/candles/view.cfm?l=eng&c=5424930 [quoted text clipped - 17 lines] > > 2.) J.K.M.A. thanks Donna and all, what a powerful and coforting website, m what a great site Donna. I lit a candle for the family. M - please keep yourself safe as well! Post regularly so we don't get worried. Remember the first thing about first aid, aid in any way is to keep yourself safe as there is nothing that can be done in the situation if the aider is hurt. Kelly > Light A Candle > Address:http://www.gratefulness.org/candles/view.cfm?l=eng&c=5424930 [quoted text clipped - 17 lines] > > 2.) J.K.M.A. *ugh* I feel too heartsick to even think clearly about this right now. Prayers, love, hugs, and all the positive energy I can send is being sent right now for that precious child and her mother. I won't tell you what the negative energy is doing. It's best not to dwell on that too much. It's so easy to let it drown out the good. Kelly C. >I have a friend who has a six year old daughter who's father gets > weekend visitation twice a month. We found out this weekend that the [quoted text clipped - 41 lines] > > m >I have a friend who has a six year old daughter who's father gets > weekend visitation twice a month. We found out this weekend that the [quoted text clipped - 41 lines] > > m Prayers of course. You confirm my feeling that sheriff's departments often don't seem to be held as accountable as police departments. Are you or is anyone you know in a position to go directly to state? I'm thinking the office of the attorney general is where you go when police matters aren't being dealt with locally. Don't know about children's services. Or can the mother and child at least go to another jurisdiction and report again. If both parents are in the same jurisdiction, it is easier for the authorities to get away with inaction. Perhaps you could refer them to counseling with someone else who would also be required to report, just not to the same people. Then there is the hypothetical option to have someone beat the hell out of the father. Something I actually considered once upon a time. The subject moved before I could find someone who wasn't already in jail for assault. Jo i do not understand this system. That is very scary. My thoughts and prayers are with this family. Rose @}>->-- Being educated means that rather than fearing the unknown, one seeks to understand it. RB Please remove "Ima" to reply. Prayers coming that way. I don't get it M. others that don't do that get hounded by CPS so why don't they protect this little one. This is terrible. SignatureLove and Hugs to all Jo the squirrely one I am nuts about you. >I have a friend who has a six year old daughter who's father gets > weekend visitation twice a month. We found out this weekend that the [quoted text clipped - 41 lines] > > m Hi M,,,,, The people involved have been prayed for. The people in this newsgroup that need support for arthritis have been prayed for. No warning, no OTP just wham,,, reading about child abuse and a little girl being abused over and over. I hope the rest of my day improves but there is no place to go but up. You did the right thing by doing what you could to find justice for the abused and taking them in. I have just said a prayer that the stress of all this is not hard on you as far as dealing with inflam.arth and these kind of problems. Harv >I have a friend who has a six year old daughter who's father gets > weekend visitation twice a month. We found out this weekend that the [quoted text clipped - 41 lines] > > m This site should bring you to the attorney general child protection dept. They are obligated to investigate under several laws including the Adam Walsh Act of 2007. http://www.ag.ca.gov/childabuse/contact.php Ann I have one other thought to say about this. Why did the mother not put a stop to this a long time ago? Why does a stranger have to take the steps needed to find justice for the little girl? The answer to that might help others that have the same type problem. Harv >I have a friend who has a six year old daughter who's father gets > weekend visitation twice a month. We found out this weekend that the [quoted text clipped - 41 lines] > > m It is hard for me to imagine CPS doing nothing after the pediatrician's report. They are required by law to do an investigation. If you don't hear from them by noon today, start calling all the way up the food chain. Call an attorney ASAP. Call the DA directly. Call the media if you have to. Did he ever take the daughter across state lines? If so, call the FBI. This just really pisses me off. Please update us as you find out more. Thank you for being there for this family. You are an angel. Prayers have been said and will continue to be said. Walt >I have a friend who has a six year old daughter who's father gets > weekend visitation twice a month. We found out this weekend that the [quoted text clipped - 41 lines] > > m Do you have a state police department that would supercede the sheriff's department? The attorney general's office should be interested in this also. Do you have a state advocate for victims of domestic abuse? As a last resort I would call a tv station or newspaper and promise them exclusive rights to the story after criminal investigation has been completed. How about calling the governor's office and your representatives? The local aid to dependent children and family (welfare) office should have someone they can refer you to. What kind of world are we livhng in where you can't get someone to listen when a child is being brutalized? I am furious, but will pray when I calm down. > Do you have a state police department that would supercede the sheriff's > department? [quoted text clipped - 7 lines] > can't get someone to listen when a child is being brutalized? I am > furious, but will pray when I calm down. Hi Ann,,,, This kind of fury can be very harmful to yourself. There is no way to unload this kind of fury and it effects your immune system. We all feel bad for the wife and child and angry that it is so hard to struggle in the system to get justice. I have taken people in while the right thing is found to handle the problem and most of the time it is the police. I have a wife and four children and my biggest problem was to not let the problem effect them. I want you to realize that M is doing what she can do to protect and get help for the people in her house. Our anger does not help anyone. Harv Sending Good Thoughts, {{{{M, Child, Mom}}}} GrampaHugs, Alex, -- **************************************************** * Love radiating from 45.10n x 93.30w M/SP Mn * http://home.comcast.net/~apbarna/ * http://goldenmist.org/ahr_faq/index.html * http://goldenmist.org/grampahugs/ * http://goldenmist.org/ **************************************************** Oh that breaks my heart. Poor child, and poor mama. Think how that child has suffered and think ow the mama is suffering knowing about it only now. Prayers ongoing for the child and mama ( and you) and for the sheriff's department to get off its duff and do what it is supposed to do. I can't imagaine why the unconcern on their part. Oh dear Lord, keep that child (and mama) safe, and Melinda. Gwen >I have a friend who has a six year old daughter who's father gets > weekend visitation twice a month. We found out this weekend that the [quoted text clipped - 41 lines] > > m Prayers and hugs for you and the family. SignatureNavy Take out the FISH to email me. >I have a friend who has a six year old daughter who's father gets > weekend visitation twice a month. We found out this weekend that the [quoted text clipped - 41 lines] > > m
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