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Medical Forum / Diseases and Disorders / Arthritis / May 2007OTP: Over 60?-Humor (I hope)
> Q: Where can women over the age of 60 find young, sexy men, who are > interested in them? > A: Try a bookstore under fiction. > Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause? > A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can finish the basement. > When > you are done you will have a place to live. > Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your 60+ year old husband? > A: Tell him you're pregnant. > Q: How can you avoid spotting a wrinkle every time you walk by a > mirror? > A: The next time you're in front of a mirror, take off your glasses. > Q: Why should 60+ year old people use valet parking? > A: Valets don't forget where they park your car. > Q: Is it common for 60+ year olds to have problems with short term > memory > storage? > A: Storing memory is not a problem, retrieving it is a problem. > Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly > A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon. > Q: Where do 60+ year olds look for fashionable glasses? > A: Their foreheads. > Q: What is the most common remark made by 60+ year olds when they enter > antique stores? > A: "I remember these!" Especially like the one about valet parking. Last night I was at the long term parking lot of the airport. I was OK. Remembered to write the location on the parking stub, and didn't lose it before we got home. But there were a few old guys wandering about looking for their cars. I guess it happens pretty often. The bus driver stopped and asked one guy if he knew his license plate number. That if he did he could use one of the phones in the bus shelters to find out where he had parked. Apparently they went around every day and made a record, in part for cases like his. Jo >> Q: Where can women over the age of 60 find young, sexy men, who are > [quoted text clipped - 45 lines] > >> A: "I remember these!" Shoot, I'm not even 60 and can relate to some of this!!! Can I blame it on the stroke instead? ROFL!!! Only problem is, I have "lost" my car 3 times at the local university hospital as their lot is so huge and they have so many different entrances to the hospital that it is so easy to get turned around. All 3 times I had to call security and they drove me around until we found it! Uggggh---how embarassing, but the security guys say they do this more than a dozen times a day with people so I guess I'm in good company even if I am under 60! LOL . . . . Donna . . . . 1. ANGELS EXIST, but some times, since they don't all have wings, we call them FRIENDS...... 2. J.K.M.A. 3. C.c..........C.c..........C.c.........C.c..! > Shoot, I'm not even 60 and can relate to some of this!!! Can I blame > it on the stroke instead? ROFL!!! Only problem is, I have "lost" my [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] > so I guess I'm in good company even if I am under 60! LOL > . When my Dad had to go for radiation treatments, he was very impressed that they provided valet parking. It was nice of them. But sometimes I think they did it in self defense. Jo LOL.......yep, Jo. The same hospital where I "lost" my car, started offering valet parking about a year or two ago. I love that they offer it too and I'm sure it makes there lives easier to some extent as well. Now, at least the security guys can work on security issues instead of making so many trips through the parking structure helping people find their vehicles. Donna . . . . 1. ANGELS EXIST, but some times, since they don't all have wings, we call them FRIENDS...... 2. J.K.M.A. 3. C.c..........C.c..........C.c.........C.c..! > .......yep, Jo. The same hospital where I "lost" my car, > started offering valet parking about a year or two ago. The medical center that my oncologist's offfice is in also offers valet parking. And there is a sign "FREE for disabled." I guess they require a handicapped license plate or placard to quality for "FREE." Never have used the service although I've had a placard since 1990 (received my 2007-09 placard in the mail.2 weeks ago). It's a new service since my rheumy moved from the oncologist's building to larger quarters 3 years ago. From the equivalent of 2 doctors' offices to an entire floor in the new building, plus DXEA and X-ray facilities on another floor. > LOL.......yep, Jo. The same hospital where I "lost" my car, started > offering valet parking about a year or two ago. I love that they offer > it too and I'm sure it makes there lives easier to some extent as well. > Now, at least the security guys can work on security issues instead of > making so many trips through the parking structure helping people find > their vehicles. Ya know, it reminds me of the Flint airport. Long term parking now tells you to wait AT YOUR CAR. They pick you up there and hand you a slip with your car's location written down so you can find it on your return. The hospital I worked at in Florida had parking garages due to space considerations. The advantage there was if you remembered which garage and which level it was fairly easy to find your vehicle. (Being Florida though, you learned to park lower down if possible so your car didn't get as hot!)  SignatureNann remove the Gator cheer to email me Simply the thing I am shall make me live --- William Shakespeare > Especially like the one about valet parking. > [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] > > Jo Personally I've been guilty of looking for my glasses all over only to find them on my head! GaryZ I have a missing car story too. Recently I got rid of my 16 year old car and am driving a newer one, different manufacturer, different color. Handicapped spots at the mall were all taken so I just took the nearest available space. When I came out I couldn't find the car. Of course I was looking for the "OLD" car. I hit the horn button on my door opener thingamajig and luckily was lose enough for it to work. When I heard the horn and saw lights blinking I jumped in and exited the lot fast. Can we say embarrassed? Ann >I have a missing car story too. Recently I got rid of my 16 year old > car and am driving a newer one, different manufacturer, different color. [quoted text clipped - 7 lines] > > Ann Wellll, I got a couple of stories with neither one toooo bad. I and 5 other adults were going to the Astros game. Laughing and cutting up,,, I only had a general idea of where my car was. It only took about 45 minutes of wandering about in that area before we found it. Ooooh, the ribbing I took. The second time was going to a Rockets game with my oldest son which is an internal parking garage and it took alot longer with my son getting sooo pissed off at his dad. The reason it was so bad is there were soooo many levels that go so deep in the ground this I swear I could smell Chinese cooking. I learned my lesson that time. I let someone else do the driving and always check the number and letters. So it goes. Harv > Wellll, I got a couple of stories with neither one toooo bad. I and 5 > other adults were going to the Astros game. Laughing and cutting up,,, I > only had a general idea of where my car was. It only took about 45 minutes > of wandering about in that area before we found it. Ooooh, the ribbing I > took. LOL - I used to park on a street a couple of blocks from work as parking decals were known as "hunting licenses" around there. (many more decals than spaces.) It is a busy four lane road with parallel parking on both sides. From time to time a co-worker would mention seeing me wandering along the street as they were leaving. Yup, I'd say - I went to where I parked two days ago, rather than where I parked yesterday.... but I found the care eventually!" SignatureNann remove the Gator cheer to email me Simply the thing I am shall make me live --- William Shakespeare |
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