The Honorable Paul S. Sarbanes
309 Hart Senate Office Building
Washington DC , 20510

Dear Senator Sarbanes,

As a native Marylander and excellent customer of the Internal Revenue
Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted the
Department of Homeland Security in an effort to determine the process
for
becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to you.

My primary reason for wishing to change my status from U.S. Citizen to
illegal alien stem from the bill which was recently passed by the
Senate and
for which you voted.

If my understanding of this bill's provisions is accurate, as an
illegal
alien who has been in the United States for five years, all I need to
do to
become a citizen is to pay a $2,000 fine and income taxes for three of
the
last five years. I know a good deal when I see one and I am anxious to
get
the process started before everyone figures it out.

Simply put, those of us who have been here legally have had to pay
taxes
every year so I'm excited about the prospect of avoiding two years of
taxes
in return for paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way that I can apply
to be
illegal retroactively? This would yield an excellent result for me and
my
family because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and 2005.

Additionally, as an illegal alien I could begin using the local
emergency
room as my primary health care provider. Once I have stopped paying
premiums
for medical insurance, my accountant figures I could save almost
$10,000 a
year. Another benefit in gaining illegal status would be that my
daughter
would receive preferential treatment relative to her law school
applications, as well as "in-state" tuition rates for many colleges
throughout the United States for my son.

Lastly, I understand that illegal status would relieve me of the burden
of
renewing my driver's license and making those burdensome car insurance
premiums. This is very important to me given that I still have college
age
children driving my car!

If you would provide me with an outline of the process to become
illegal
(retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms, I would
be
most appreciative. Thank you for your assistance.

Your Loyal Constituent,
Pete

Get your Forms (NOW)!! Call your Internal Revenue Service
1-800-289-1040.

! Please pass this onto your friends so they can save on this great
offer!!!!