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Medical Forum / Diseases and Disorders / Arthritis / October 2006OTP: Animal Lovers
PET RULES To be posted VERY LOW on the refrigerator door -- nose height. Dear Dogs and Cats: The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest. The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run. I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm. For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years --canine or feline attendance is not required. The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough! To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on our front door: To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit & Like to Complain About Our Pets: 1. They live here. You don't. 2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. (That's why they call it "fur"niture.) 3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people. 4. To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly. Remember: Dogs and cats are better than kids because they: 1. Eat less 2. Don't ask for money all the time 3 Are easier to train 4. Normally come when called 5. Never ask to drive the car 6. Don't hang out with drug-using friends 7. Don't smoke or drink 8. Don't have to buy the latest fashions 9. Don't want to wear your clothes 10. Don't need a gazillion dollars for college, and... 11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children. Thought y'all would like this. DeeTee i thought you didn't have a cat or dog, deetee.<smile> this was cute. thanks, kid. kate PET RULES To be posted VERY LOW on the refrigerator door -- nose height. Dear Dogs and Cats: The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest. The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run. I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm. For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years --canine or feline attendance is not required. The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough! To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on our front door: To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit & Like to Complain About Our Pets: 1. They live here. You don't. 2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. (That's why they call it "fur"niture.) 3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people. 4. To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly. Remember: Dogs and cats are better than kids because they: 1. Eat less 2. Don't ask for money all the time 3 Are easier to train 4. Normally come when called 5. Never ask to drive the car 6. Don't hang out with drug-using friends 7. Don't smoke or drink 8. Don't have to buy the latest fashions 9. Don't want to wear your clothes 10. Don't need a gazillion dollars for college, and... 11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children. Thought y'all would like this. DeeTee I love this one..I think I will post it for my visiting realities...hehehehe > PET RULES > [quoted text clipped - 56 lines] > Thought y'all would like this. > DeeTee I love the advice to all non-pet owners who visit! Gwen > PET RULES > [quoted text clipped - 56 lines] > Thought y'all would like this. > DeeTee rofl John told me that this morning about one minute after I left the house, Paku figured it out and which door I did my escape from. He then spent the next 15 minutes throwing his body at the door and screeming like the best 2 year old toddler just left at daycare. It would have been pitiful had it not been so funny. He was sleeping like a lamb when I got home from PT. must have been tired. Duckie > PET RULES > [quoted text clipped - 55 lines] > Thought y'all would like this. > DeeTee ROTFL! poor paku. his tantrum must have plum tuckered him out. mugs often tries to block the doorway, when he knows i'm leaving. a quick pat on the head and ear scratch goodbye and he's satisfied. mugs simply wants to be able to say goodbye or be said goodbye to. i haven't figured out which, yet.LOL and he's always the first to the door when someone is there. my official "greeter".LOL kate rofl John told me that this morning about one minute after I left the house, Paku figured it out and which door I did my escape from. He then spent the next 15 minutes throwing his body at the door and screeming like the best 2 year old toddler just left at daycare. It would have been pitiful had it not been so funny. He was sleeping like a lamb when I got home from PT. must have been tired. Duckie DeeTee and Bob Taggart wrote: > PET RULES > [quoted text clipped - 60 lines] > Thought y'all would like this. > DeeTee When I leave Abbie at home, I ask her if she will look after the house for me, then tell her she is a good dog, and that I will be back. She's completely satisfied and just stays where she is. Gwen > ROTFL! poor paku. his tantrum must have plum tuckered him out. mugs > often [quoted text clipped - 84 lines] >> Thought y'all would like this. >> DeeTee > ROTFL! poor paku. his tantrum must have plum tuckered him out. mugs often > tries to block the doorway, when he knows i'm leaving. a quick pat on the [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] > > kate My hubby is allergic to furry babies, so we have feathery ones. Titan (Sun Conure) likes to announce the presence of anyone who comes to visit. Sprite (Double Yellow Headed Amazon) likes to greet everyone with a "Hi, Sprite" or "Hello" in his cute birdy voice. They are very sad when we leave in the morning to go to work (I'm not sure if its because we're leaving, or because they have to be closed up in their cages until we get home). However, they don't make pitiful noises if I tell them goodbye & what good birds they are & that I will see them later. I think they may understand a little that I will return. Shannon I really miss having fur babies, sigh. Oh, well, I try to look on the bright side...we can leave on trips at any time without prior arrangements. It's not the best, but it cheers me up temporarily. DeeTee > rofl John told me that this morning about one minute after I left the > house, Paku figured it out and which door I did my escape from. He then [quoted text clipped - 64 lines] >> Thought y'all would like this. >> DeeTee |
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