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Medical Forum / Diseases and Disorders / Arthritis / August 2006OTP Home Security System
>HOW TO INSTALL A HOME SECURITY SYSTEM >> > >> >1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men's used >> size 14-16 work boots. >> > >> >2. Place them on your front porch, along with several empty >> beer cans, a copy of Guns & Arms; Ammo magazine and several NRA >> magazines. >> >3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazine. >> >4. Leave a note on your door that reads: >> >Hey Bubba, Big Jim, Duke and Slim, I went to the gun shop >> for more ammunition - back in an hour. Don't mess with the pit >> bulls -- they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up >> real bad. I don't think Killer took part in it but it was hard to >> tell from all the blood. >> >PS - I locked all four of 'em in the house. Better wait >> outside. I remember hearing about a college student in the early '70s who was an amateur herpetologist and who lived in a first floor student apartment. His prized "pet" was a cobra that he kept in a plexiglas enclosure which was only accessible through the front porch window. From what I heard, his apartment was the only one on the block which was never broken into... |
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