You didn't mention her age, but some folks are simply
too old to change habits.

Hve you contacted the Arthritis Foundation or visited
its website at http://www.arthritis.org ?  You could
obtain booklets to send her, or print of pages of data
re: diet and exerciset and mail them to her.

Another place to visit is the Cedars-Sinai Medical Center
at http://www.cedars-sinai.edu and look for rheumatology.

And......are you sure this isn't payback for all the times
her daughter wouldn't listen to her?    Eat your vegatables.
Don't do this.   Don't do that.   Be home by..........

... A cat's purr is the rumble of peace in the animal kingdom.

You probably can't. But is she seeing a rheumatologist and taking pills
prescribed for RA or just taking pain meds? She might see that a better diet and
exercise helped a bit, but it might take a while. Meanwhile, you might inquire
about a rheumatologist? If she takes pills she might take what is prescribed.
There are people who treat everything will pills. And I know, from experience
with my own mother, suggesting anything was a waste of breath. :-)
---
Joan

Rheumatoid arthritis is an autoimmune disorder. You /have/ to take
medication or it will damage you permanently. If you had an infection
tearing you up inside, would you refuse treatment?

Exercising when your joints are being attacked by your own immune
system, and the cells killed/damaged by it, is not really going to
happen very much until the symptoms are controlled with medication.
Keeping the joints as mobile as possible is a great thing to do, and
exercise has other benefits including improved cardiovascular health and
weight control. However, rheumatoid arthritis can cause damage to other
organs and systems as well and her focus needs to be on getting the
disease under control.

These are great suggestions for everyone, arthritis or not, but they
will NOT stop the autoimmune attack.

Firstly, you need to realise and let her know that you realise that the
disease she has causes excrutiating pain and serious damage to the body.
If you seem to be minimising this, or implying that she doesn't need
medication, she will tune out to EVERYTHING you are saying, and rightly
so. If on the other hand you make sure to understand more about the
disease that is attacking her joints (and other connective tissues as
well as other organs in some cases, like the lungs) and put these
suggestions to her as adjunctive therapy rather than a replacement for
the medication she needs (if you've ever done that that's pretty nuts,
and I don't know one way or the other if you have or haven't, I'm just
talking from my experience of what I've seen and heard from family
members of friends with that particular form of arthritis) you are more
likely to get her to listen to you. Your suggestions are good ones, and
probably quite beneficial if you understand the limitations on movement
the disease can and does impose. Exercise is very helpful in maintaining
joint mobility and improved diet has too many benefits to list
(especially for drinking extra pure water, the benefits to her kidneys
and liver are pretty pronounced when taking medication for arthritis). I
think you trying to help your mother change long term negative habits is
admirable, but from a distance it'll be a challenge. As I've said, your
best bet is to seem like you know what you're talking about and have
taken everything (especially the medical FACTS) into account before
making your suggestions. I swear, if one more person suggests some
herbal placebo or some type of crap faith healing to me I'm going to go
postal (and I eat better and am fitter than 99% of them, despite all
that's happened to me).

Regards,

Ari

You've already received many words of wisdom from others and I'm not going to
repeat what they said.  There is one additional thing that I thought of
though.  My very first rheumatologist emphasized to me that caffeine effects
our pain receptors so that, in most cases, we experience pain as more
debilitating when taking in a lot of caffeine, so he recommended keeping
caffeine intake at a lower level as much as possible.  (This wouldn't apply
to situations like migraines, but does apply to joint pain.)  Perhaps that
bit would encourage your mom to drink less diet Pepsi.

One other thought on changing her attitude - do you suppose if you joined the
Arthritis Foundation in her name and had their information sent directly to
her, she might begin to accept some of what they say?  I've had my
frustrations with the AF, but they do repeatedly espouse good advice about
diet and exercise and attitude.  Perhaps having their magazine showing up in
her mailbox would help.

Where in Michigan is she?  Any chance of getting her to an arthritis support
group locally?  I'm in Michigan, but rural tip of the mitt and the nearest
group is 25 miles away.  If she's in a more urban area though, she might be
willing to go to a local group to make some new friends who understand and
they might win her over in time.  I guess I had more to say han I realized!  
;-)

The other aspect of a chronic health condition that contributes to an
unheaalthy lifestyle is depression. When people are depressed they may
not eat properly, get fresh air, or exercise- all of which contribute
to decreased health.

Others have suggested educating yourself about RA and I second that.
Medication plays an important role in treatment. A healthful diet is
important as is exercise and maintaining a positive outlook. These are
not a cure and an effective medical regimen is important before joint
damage becomes significant.

Jessica,

You found your way to ASA to ask for advice.

If Mom has a computer, perhaps you can setup the ASA access for her on
her computer. I know there are a lot of people here she could relate to
and share thoughts with to help her days go better for her.

Helps you share the burden as well.  Stick around as well there is a lot
a care giver can learn here.

Don Whitely

Did family members and friends of people with Arthritis know that soon
they can wear a special made suit for a day and find out how it might
feel when we have OA and RA?  I just read read about this suit in one
of my daily news alerts.  Butt, my FMS *brain fog* has helped me forget
where I read this online!  Auuugh!  I will try to find it.  It is true.

Nann wrote:
< One other thought on changing her attitude - do you suppose if you
joined the
< Arthritis Foundation in her name and had their information sent
directly to
< her, she might begin to accept some of what they say?

The  AF *Arthritis Today* magazine is great!  I am an AF member in
Central Florida.
Web site:  www.arthritis.org

< Any chance of getting her to an arthritis support group locally? ...
she might be
< willing to go to a local group to make some new friends who
understand and
< they might win her over in time

I am also a volunteer group leader for our Arthritis Support Group of
South Lake County, Florida.  Joining a support group has helped me
soooo much.  Actually we didn't have a group in our community so I took
a chance with a few others and started one on our hosptal campus.
October 1st, 2007 is our first year anniversary. Yay!  Sometimes if a
family member or friend brings a new member to the group in the
beginning then she or he might get them interested to return. :-)

I have learned that I'm not alone, new tips and tricks, more education
about Arthritis and treatments from the Arthritis Support Group
meetings.  The people have taken turns encouraging each other too
because we do falter occassionally.  Just last month's meeting I was in
an awful *frump* and they gave me back a lot of warm fuzzies and
compliments and sent me on my way.  The next week was so much more
positive for me and they helped me feel sooo much better.  I love my
online support group(s) {{{{hugs to MyFmsly}}}} and my f-2-f
(face-to-face) meetings.  I also do aquatic Exercise 3 times a week and
follow the *No-Nightshades Diet", by Dr. Childers, UF, Gainesville, Fl

Warm Thoughts and Breezes,
Meg
Web Blog: www.arthritisgrp-slc.blogspot.com