This has been a constant problem with Doris' clothing, as well.  They've
changed what room she's been in a couple times, just for that reason.
At first, Doris was the one who borrowed other's clothing; lately,
others have borrowed hers.

What we ended up doing was leaving a maximum of a week's worth of
clothing there, with 10 days worth of underwear and socks.  If we left
more than that, it would get get lost in other closets.

The most disappointing thing was when I made her a teddy bear that was
stuffed with lavender & chamomille, which helped her relax and go to
sleep when she cuddled it (VERY good when she was at her most agitated).
 I had even stitched her name on the bear's back.  About 2 months after
I gave it to her, another resident took it.  Someone eventually got sick
while they were holding it and it had be to thrown out.

Beth

Evelyn,  We've gone thru the lost clothes scenario as well.  It did get
better as the wanderers worsened and became less mobile, but it is
distressing.  I was told to have only a few outfits at  a time and even tho'
I have more now-she usually is in the same few-with others untouched.  What
has happened-especially as she's become messier with her meals- is that I've
become less fussy.  She's changed twice a day morning and night-and they are
putting clean things on her.  So I've quit fussing.  In fact it's a battle
again to get any damp top off after I've done her hair.  No specific
suggestions other than to let it be known how upset it makes you and label
things well.
Beth

My suggestions:  Get an MD order that they are to be worn 24 hours a day.
Discuss with all the higher-ups that are responsible for her care.  I
actually did an inservice to most of the staff when I first brought them in.
Showed, discussed reason, etc.  It was new to them.  The head nurse made up
a sign and posted it in her room that the Hip Savers were to be on 24-hours
a day.  Have sufficient pairs available.  I ordered 3, but we're only using
2 because Marion is continent when awake.  It took Marion only 2 days to
adjust.  And I've always found them on her when we visit.  Sometimes down at
her knees, but she has them on.  Her figure looks a bit lumpy sometimes, but
it doesn't bother her anymore.   I'm grateful.
Best wishes.
Beth

Yes, that's the way it is.  It drove me crazy too for a while.  I would
go to the demtia unit often and try to get it all sorted out, until I
realized that
my goal was to not go there so often because it was too rough on me
and I had to let go a little.  One of the hearing aids disappeared for
good, the eyeglasses' location was an ongoing problem, the upper plate's
location was sometimes a mystery.

I had hemmed a nice pair of flannel pajamas and put Mom's name
on them, of course.  Soon after I brought them in, I saw her roommate
wearing them.  Her roommate was twice her size and was stretching
them out.  I gave up and smiled nicely.  They really think the whole
facility is their own house and every dresser is their dresser.  Mom
was the same way.

On the bright side, lots of the clothes I thought were gone for good
would turn up later.  I think you get a chance at getting them back
each time they are washed.

Now Mom is in a nursing home and can't walk and she wears
all sorts of clothes I've never seen before that the staff puts on
her.  The upper plate has been mangled and no longer fits.
The glasses still survive, but are taped up.

joan

====================================
Hi Evelyn,

I hate to say it...but I'm not surprised. Lots of AD
patients think that everything they see belongs to
them. If these were nice dressy clothes and were
not marked...it's even possible that the staff could
have taken them. And...labels are easily removed.

My wife picks up Rosie's dirty clothes every
day. And she sees that Rosie eats her breakfast,
at least we know she eats one full meal each day.
She has a tendency to get up and wander away
from the table and even though the staff is helpful,
they simply cannot devote all their time to one
patient.

She also gives Rosie a bath. We don't want her
to be herded into a communal shower by god
knows who.

At any given time she has about 6 changes in
her closet. And she wears mainly sweat suits
and pajamas....IMHO there is no reason for an
AD patient to have dressy clothing...it's just a
disaster waiting to happen.

Every item is clearly marked with an indellible
felt tip laundry marker. And I mean *every* single
piece. Each sock, each shoe, each t-shirt, etc.
Labels are nice and neat, but the indellible
marker cannot be removed. If it fades too much,
we re-label them. If it looks bad...who cares?
Who's looking anyway?

So far (three years) every thing that has been
misplaced has been found but only because we
are persistent. Some shoes were damaged
because they were washed by mistake...also a
pair of eyeglasses were destroyed by another
patient who literally ripped the ear pieces off...
the nursing home paid for the items.

As for the hipguards...I suspect that if you have
a consultation with Ida's Dr. and ask him to
prescribe them...this would pressure the NH to
monitor Ida and be sure she uses them.

A fair amount of the missing stuff is likely to come back eventually.
As I've mentioned before, every time I went to visit Dolli, I used to
do a thorough search of her closet, drawers, cupboards etc. and I
would frequently find clothing and other things that weren't hers and
take them to the nursing station. Mobile residents wander in and out
of each other's rooms and both pick things up and leave things - and
that included Dolli. She was big on hoarding cloth napkins from the
dining room as well. I'm sure other people were doing the same thing
with their loved ones, since every now and then, items I thought were
gone for good would resurface.

Have you looked at the Silvert's page? If you could find a pull on
washable pant that was suitable on their page you could order from
them and it would save you a lot of time - you could just order a
bunch more when you needed more(which is the groove I got into -
including the velcro closure shoes, undies, cardigans etc.) It was
hugely convenient rather than dragging around to stores trying to find
the right thing for someone in later dementia when practicality rules
in terms of what is appropriate.

Mary G.

Awwww dang, sorry you have to go through this so early (the disappearing clothing)
but it does happen, and will continue to happen.  The only way I can think of to
stop those clothes from *walking* is to install keyed locks on the closets - but
then mom won't be able to get to her things.  The best I can tell you is that the
clothing will eventually reappear, at least it always does in my moms case.
Sometimes it comes back within a week, sometimes a month, but it always has come
back.  When I notice missing things I notify the staff and they put an APB out
<grin> ... I think that pretty much means that if they notice things that don't
belong to someone else, then they return them.  But I also understand it's next to
impossible for them to go through every persons closet on a daily basis.  

You might want to go through the closet of your mom's roommate ... in the past I
have found some of my mom's articles in there.  I think maybe mom or the nurses
just get confused when putting things away.  The nursing home my mom is at, will
reimburse for missing clothing - if it doesn't reappear after a few weeks.  All
they ask is that I submit a receipt.  I haven't done it yet, decided the overall
care she gets is by far worth more than the expense I've incurred replacing
clothing.  Now you probably understand why many of us said to keep the clothing to
basics, and inexpensive functional items.  Almost every item of my mom's is now
from Wal-Mart, K-Mart, Target, etc.  Easily washable, easily and affordably
replaced.  It broke my heart to have to make this step but truthfully, mom doesn't
notice.  I visited yesterday and she was complaining that she hated the pants she
was wearing.  I said, *good - they aren't yours* ... and we both had a good laugh.

What I do with my mom's clothing is pretty much stick to one or two brands - then
the sizing doesn't become an issue.  Find something that fits, stick with it.  Buy
the same item in several different colors.  If you need to replace again, go for
the same brand.  Yes, it's boring but I doubt Ida is going to know.  I also have
moved to sweatsuits for winter, try to stick with coordinating colors as the
shirts rarely end up worn with the correct pants. <g>  This spring I've moved to
capri's and a few pairs of shorts and t's or stretchy knit sweaters - easy for mom
to put on (so far anyway).  

Guess all I can tell you Evelyn, is to not let this get the best of you and try
not to let it upset you.  I know it's hard - the first few times I went through it
I was really upset.  Now I come to expect it and am happily surprised when I
arrive and nothing is missing.

Joyce

 Hi, Evelyn:
 Sorry the clothes bandits got to Ida so soon! Yes, some of it -- the stuff
that was labeled -- will get back to Ida when the laundry room picks the
stuff up to wash it. It drove me crazy when we had my mom in a nursing home.
 You actually have two choices: you can either (1) do the laundry yourself.
Not a practical thing because that means you have to keep the laundry up and
hope that nobody walks in and takes anything.
 The other choice is to leave only the most disposable clothing there for
Ida and bring her nicer things only when you're going to take her someplace
or for a special occasion at the NH...but be sure to remove the nice stuff
and take it with you when you leave!
 With my mom, when it got really bad, I had my cousin put a lock on the
closet. I gave one key to the office and I had the other key. No body could
get in there without it being one of the staff.
 Mary K
 > Almost all of Ida's clothing is gone.   She had about 14 outfits and now
 > there are only about 5 left.   All the socks are missing but a couple of
 > pairs.   I went to the laundry area to look through the lost and found
of
 > unlabeled clothing, and nothing was there.
 >
 > The nurse told me that often clothing is taken by the residents who go
in
 > and out of one anothers rooms.   Now I will have to buy her some new
pants,
 > which has always been a bit of a hassle.
 >
 > I have no idea if they will find everything or not.  Most of it was
labeled
 > but the first few outfits I brought to the nursing home had no labels on
 > them.   A package of socks is not a big deal, but all those pants are.
 >
 > She is in a wheelchair now with a "lap buddy" which is a big foam thing
that
 > fits by pressure between the armrests almost as a sort of a tray would.
I
 > may be looking at those hip guards, but how can one be assured they
would
 > put them on her?
 >
 > --
 > Regards,
 > Evelyn
 >
 > (to reply to me personally, remove 'sox")
 >
 >