I am sitting here reflecting about the last 2 years with my father Leon.
As many of you know, he passed away on February 3 of this year.

Mark, one of my closest friends, is going through a tough time with his
mother.  She has been on medication for many years for schizophrenia.
Mostly, the meds have kept it under control.

In the last year she has had to go into a mental hospital twice to get her
medications adjusted and get the schizophrenia under control.  She is in the
hospital again.  They are trying various combinations and doses of
medication to get her back to reality.  So far, she is not responding.

I told Mark, I was afraid she may have an underlining dementia that is
causing her schizophrenia to go out of control.  Time will tell on that.

Mark expressed to me just how tired he is right now.  He is making daily
trips to the hospital to visit here.  He is giving his father lots of
support in dealing with mom.

I can remember what he is going through.  Just going and visiting Dad at the
nursing home for the last 6 months of his life was draining.  It is very
consuming.  It is damn near debilitating.

I can remember
  The fatigue
  The never ending tiredness
  Not feeling rested no matter how much sleep I got
I can remember
  Not wanting to deal with my life
  My bills, my work, my "stuff"
  Dad's medical bills and insurance
I can remember
  Soaking in a hot bath with a can of beer or glass of wine
     trying to unwind.
  Running for exercise
  Running for physical release
  Running till my most important need was breathing
  the never ending understanding and support of my wife
I can remember
  Telling, (no! demanding), my brothers they HAD to go visit Dad at least
once a week
     "so I could have a break... or I was going to lose it!"
     I can't keep going 7 days a week!
 Getting calls...
     He fell...
     He fell again...
     He had breathing difficulties
  Trying to get him to eat just ONE more bite
I can remember
  Seeing my Father MAD as Hell
     in all my life I think I saw him lose his temper once...
         that was before Alzheimers
     thank God, even with the Alzheimers, it was 3 maybe 4 times.
I can remember
  Dad taking me to Burger King on Sundays when I was kid...
  going to Baskin Robins for Ice cream
  God, its so hard to remember what he was like before .... Alzheimers
I can remember
  Dad getting upset when we spend $450 on a new dryer.
     his concept of the cost of things was stuck in the 60's or 70's
  Going to Denny's
     he always got the Belgium waffle, Crisp bacon, scrambled eggs
     even when he couldn't read the menu anymore, that was his meal...
always

Isn't it funny how a dear friend telling me how tired he is after visiting
his mom make me remember so many things?

Isn't funny how one thought leads to another?  An unbroken chain: one
thought linked to the next.  Fragile links though they are.

Isn't it funny that my father's end, his release, his freedom!, was also a
release for his loved ones too?

- Mike,
  Friendswod, TX