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Medical Forum / Diseases and Disorders / Alzheimer's / March 2004To My Children
Subject: To My Children When I spill some food on my nice clean dress Or maybe forget to tie my shoes, Please be patient and perhaps reminisce About the many hours I spent with you, When I taught you how to eat with care, Plus tying laces and your numbers too, Dressing yourself and combing your hair. Those were precious hours spent with you, So when I forget what I was about to say, Just give me a minute.....or maybe two, It probably wasn't important anyway, And I would much rather listen just to you. If I tell the story one more time, And you know the ending through and through, Please remember your first nursery rhyme When I rehearsed it a hundred times with you. When my legs are tired and it's hard to stand, Or walk the steady path that I would like to do, Please take me carefully by the hand, And guide me now as I often did for you. --Author Unknown  Signature--------------------------------------------------------------------------- ------- Grandchildren are God's reward for not killing your kids. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- ------ That was one of the saddest poems I ever read Nancy Z but so true > That was one of the saddest poems I ever read > Nancy Z > but so true Nancy, Alzheimers is a sad disease. To tell you the truth, it absolutely sucks. SignatureEvelyn (To reply to me personally, remove sox) You are absolutely right. I see that everyday and every time I read someones post that is in the more advanced stages. I only go to my folks once a week for the day and stay overnight, but some days I don't want to go at all. I get up at 2am to go to work and get out of work at 1pm. I get to my folks about 2 and never have a chance to sit down and rest at all. Dad goes out and does his shopping etc. He just needs to get out. But mom goes through some very nasty stages, like telling me to get out, I am no good, she never wants to see me again, and then sometimes doesn't even know who I am. I know this is the disease, but sometimes when I am tired it can really get to me. Then with the snap of a finger, she is sweet as pie. Even though dad knows its the disease it gets to him some times too. He never curses and when she gets going, man, she comes out with some words I never knew she new. Sometimes he'll just leave the room. When I go back to work in the morning, after staying with them all night, I am totally exhausted and when I get home by 2 , I just have to take a nap. That dad I am good for nothing. Its so great to have this group to go back to whenever I want to feel that we are not alone. Even though I don't post that often, its good to know you are all here. Yes, the disease sucks and its a double stinky thing watching both parents fade, mom with the disease and dad taking care of her. He has aged so much too. Luckily mom is in a wheel chair so he doesn't have to worry about where she is. Nancy Z Nancy, it is a very sad fact that many times the caregiver dies before the AD patient because the stress, strain, aggravation, exhaustion, etc. cause the caregiver to become sicker that the patient. It really would be good for your dad to have someone come in to help him regularly, but sometimes people, particularly the elderly, just don't want anyone else in the house. Gwen Signature=========================================== Run after two rabbits and you won't catch either one =========================================== | You are absolutely right. I see that everyday and every time I read | someones post that is in the more advanced stages. [quoted text clipped - 22 lines] | worry about where she is. | Nancy Z > He > never curses and when she gets going, man, she comes out with some words > I never knew she new. Sometimes he'll just leave the room. He needs to talk to her doctor about meds to deal with the agitation. > You are absolutely right. I see that everyday and every time I read > someones post that is in the more advanced stages. <snip> Frank, next time please dont snip the entire message you are replying to, as you can see the start of your post make sno sense since no one can read what it is you think is right :-) SignatureTumbleweed Remove my socks for email address > mom goes through some very nasty stages, like telling me to get out, I > am no good, she never wants to see me again, and then sometimes doesn't > even know who I am. > I know this is the disease, but sometimes when I am tired it can really > get to me. Then with the snap of a finger, she is sweet as pie. > Even though dad knows its the disease it gets to him some times too. > Nancy Z Nancy there are very good medications that help with all that anger and agitation. Contact your doctor as soon as you can and explain that she is often "extremely agitated" (use that expression, it is important) and it is very hard to care for her like that. I say this not for your sake, but for your mom's sake as well. It isn't good for her to be angry and excited like that, and you know it is from the illness, not her usual way to be. Medication can be helpful with this symptom. This isn't the dark ages, and we don't have to tough this illness out with absolutely no help at all. I have no idea how we would have coped without the right medication to help, especially in the stage your mom is in. SignatureEvelyn (To reply to me personally, remove sox) I can ditto the expressions of anger agitation etc to the extreme. Mom also is having many anxiety attacks but so far none of the meds tried have helped..... in fact they worked the opposite way they were supposed to work, making her even more agitated. The remaining drugs to try (zyprexa, resperdol and haladol) just are not acceptable unless she becomes totally beyond being able to handle. Now it is just very difficult.... not impossible..... though impossible to calm her down.... not impossible to love her through it. Beverly > I can ditto the expressions of anger agitation etc to the extreme. Mom also > is having many anxiety attacks but so far none of the meds tried have [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] > love her through it. > Beverly Dear Beverly, My mother in law has done very well with Risperdol. It at least stopped the agitation and suicide threats and the paranoia. I didn't think she was very happy experiencing all of that. SignatureEvelyn (To reply to me personally, remove sox) Beverly, I would agree with Evelyn here - my mother also takes Risperdol. We did have a problem with it initially, because the doctor mistakenly prescribed a dose that was 5 times too much. It turned my Mom into a zombie. We took her off the medication and completely let it get out of her system for a week before putting her back on it with the correct dosage. Prior to the medication, my mother was not sleeping more than 20 minutes at a time, 2-4 times per day. When she wasn't sleeping, she was on her feet ALL the time, very agitated. She was having some hallucinations, and constantly said she wanted to go home (she is being cared for in her own home). Efforts to convince her she was already home worked for about 10-15 minutes, then it would start over again. She became destructive in her efforts to get out. Those problems have diminished quite a bit due to the Risperdol. Our main goal was to get her so she could sleep at night. You just can't go week after week on 1-2 hours of sleep a night. One thing with the Risperdol (once the doctor got the dosage info correct), it was recommended to start with the very smallest dose (my mother's prescription is liquid) and then work up to a higher dose if it is necessary. They told us to keep Mom at the same dose for a week before increasing it. -Jennie > Dear Beverly, > > My mother in law has done very well with Risperdol. It at least stopped > the agitation and suicide threats and the paranoia. I didn't think she was > very happy experiencing all of that. > Subject: To My Children <reluctant snip> > If I tell the story one more time, > And you know the ending through and through, > Please remember your first nursery rhyme > When I rehearsed it a hundred times with you. Remembering things my father did for me when I was a child does help me regain my patience sometimes. For me, it's not a nursery rhyme, it was reading me his own childhood copy of Robinson Crusoe when I was about four, a chapter or two each night before bed, me sitting in his lap in the rocking chair in my bedroom. When Dad announces he's figured out what's wrong with the satellite dish and wants me to switch this plug for that one, and can't remember that we did that twice already, much less comprehend that this couldn't possibly be the problem, I remember when he climbed on the roof after dinner one night to fine-tune the antenna so I could watch 'King Kong' for the first time on the weak UHF station, bite my tongue and at least pretend once more to try his 'solution.' But with a child, all those actions are building a new life; with an aging parent, it's honoring a life mostly lived. -- Robert Robert, you are honoring your father's life and hope you can soon get his cooperation. Gwen Signature=========================================== Run after two rabbits and you won't catch either one =========================================== | > Subject: To My Children | > [quoted text clipped - 22 lines] | -- | Robert |
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