Kris, welcome to the club no one wants to join.

Some random jottings.

Generally Az is diagnosed when everything else is ruled out, rather than you
gettinga positive diagnosis. There are drugs which slow the progress of the
condition and may even give a temporary improvement, two of the most common
are aricept and memantine, and many people would say the best results are if
both are taken together. I am presuming your mother isnt on any drugs at the
moment (from the content of your message), the fact that she has got to the
stage where she can't recognise here husband, is worrying as it indicates
the condition has progressed quite far, so it may be that any drugs are of
limited help, as they generally work best in the early stages.

Yes, for your father, caring alone is extremely stressful, and can be bad
for his health, especially if he is the same sort of age as your mother. The
first thing you need to get done, hopefully on one of your mothers good
days, is to get her to sign POA's for both medical and financial/legal
matters. It might be better if you have the POAs rather than your father
(and maybe getting them done for your mother and father at the same time,
with you as the responsible person (not sure what the legal term is!)  might
make it easier for your mother to accept this, she may get defensive
otherwise).

There is a book which is highly recommended here. 'the 36 hour day', I think
its available on Amazon.

You should also be considering your father, by  looking at getting your
mother into care for periods in the day, just to give him a rest. 24x365
care on your own is extremely wearing.

Longer term , which may only be a year or two away, is to check out homes
for your mother. This may seem extreme but good homes tend to have long
waiting lists, and take a lot of finding.

Kris, the following site was started by a lady who used to post here whose
father had alzheimers.  It has a lot of good info you might be glad to have.
  http://www.muggsmulcher.con/kstuff/a.s.a./intro.htm
Gwen

My father had an MRI scan to look for stoke and vascular causes of memory
loss, then later had a PET scan which shows brain activity.

I've read, or maybe I saw it on TV, that the medical community claims to
have enough data that they can diagnose Alzheimer's with a PET scan. That
may be the case at the Mayo Clinic, but my father's PET scan was
inconclusive. Still, a PET scan and MRI scan are other tests to rule out
things other than Alzheimer's.

David

Thank you for the replies!  It helps!

Hey Kris, I'm sorry you are going through this - what your mother is
experiencing is not hallucinations (i.e. seeing things that aren't
there). She has a form of agnosia - an inability to recognize things.
Its part of the brain damage from whatever progressive dementia she
has. They lose their ability to recognize places, people, objects.
Sometimes this takes the form of them thinking their loved ones or
homes are imposters (they look kinda familiar but something isn't quite
right about them), or just outright not knowing who they are. So, she
doesn't know who he is, and she spins a story to explain his presence -
I guess you could call it a delusion. She's convinced he is a stranger.

She is probably much, much more impaired than you realize. You need to
start contemplating options to support your father - such as live in
help, adult daycare, and even assisted living.

If she is unsure where she is or who she is with, she may be  at danger
for wandering. Your father will not be able to keep an eye on her 24/7
to provide adequate supervision and support to keep her safe (to
prevent her from getting lost, eating things she shouldn't, keep her
appropriately dressed, away from appliances and utensils etc. etc. ).
Her muscular coordination will deteriorate, so she will be at risk for
falls. Her  depth perception will also be damaged, contributing to
falls. She will also become incontinent. Start planning for worst case,
and get some plans in place - your father won't be able to adequately
care for her alone without severe strain on his own health.

M

Dear Kris, Sorry no the test will not show definately AD. My mom has had it
now for 5 years and is getting worse every day.  She is living with me now
and it is so very hard.  Your father will not be able to handle this by
himself.  I wish I could offer some hopeful advice, but I can't.  I am so
tired now I am sick to my stomach. I just Pray that God will give us all the
courage to get through these trying times with the love we have for our loved
ones in tack.  Good Luck pgn49