Hi Chuck,

I should think that Jules has enough witnesses now, from the hospital where
his grandad had hip surgery, and the home where his grandad now lives, that
proving his devotion and love for his grandfather, and his right to see him,
should be easy enough, but it is a very daunting thought to have to get an
attorney and fight this kind of thing.

The very nature of family problems like this just totally drains one dry,
emotionally.  Trust me I know.

I advised Jules yesterday to test the situation himself and try and see his
grandfather and see if the home actually enforces his father's ban or not.
That should be the cue as to whether he actually needs to try and get a
lawyer and to take this thing further or not.

I somehow think his father is just talking out of his 'nether regions,' and
that he can't actually forbid anyone from visiting, as long as there are no
rules broken, as long as there is no disturbance, or anything like that.
If Julian is welcomed by his grandfather, I can't imagine the home actually
forbidding his visits or listening to his father's edicts about who can or
cannot see him.    I say this because my mother in law was in a nursing
home, and all you had to do was sign in, and sometimes you didn't even do
that!  They don't have the time or wherewithal to check lists of who can see
whom!

He MAY be able to prevent Julian from taking him on a day trip, but not from
visiting, I would think.   But the only way to know it for sure is to try
and make a visit and see if anything happens.

Julian, don't give up hope.   Go and visit your grandfather today and see if
all is well or not.

To everyone else.... I know what it is like to have a father who is a
hateful irrational person.  You don't have to actually DO anything wrong to
inspire hatred from them.   The hatred comes from within themselves, not
from without.

Julian has had very little family love or support, other than from his
grandparents.   But bridges that have been burnt can be rebuilt over time,
and sometimes even hateful people can turn around.    Life is strange and
you just never know how things will go later on.   He has recently
reconnected with some other relatives, and who knows.... that could lead to
better things for him.

Julian, you know you have friends who believe in your good heart and good
will for your grandfather.   I am certainly one of them!  Hang in there,
don't get angry or irrational, it's the cool head that will win this battle!