Torpedo,

The stages of alzheimers are never a clear cut, well defined thing, and as
far as a schedule is concerned, forget that too...... one person might go
through all the stages in a short time, and another might stay in one stage
for years.   Sadly, not enough is known about why that is.   In my mother in
law's case, she seemed to have some of the symptoms of a certain stage but
not all, and had some of the symptoms of the next stage, but not all.  It
was never clear cut.

Hi...My mother's dementia is so slow that sometimes I wonder if it is Alz.
I know she was first diagnosed in 1993 and is still in independent assisted
living.  I do her laundry and go over at least twice a week to remind her to
take a shower.  She a very sweet disposition.  I went to an Elder law
attorney this past week and he told me it couldn't be Alz. because it's been
going on for so long.   I figured about all dementia can be called Alz. but
quite frankly I don't know.  Maybe someone here does   .....June

Unlikely but might be some other form of dementia in which case its
possible. Dont get hung up about stages, everyone is different and in any
event may be in different stages for different functions and there is no way
on earth to know at what rate someone will decline. Its unlikely to be
constant for any person and may vary between stages.

You dont _really_ realise that or you wouldnt ask it :-)
Everyone is different, _very_ different.

You can't slot people into neat stages like you are trying to do, eg I dont
think anyone would ever usefully say 'he is a stage 6b' or anything really
specific like that. Scores on the MMSE (a short test) are about  the best
you'll get for comparative purposes. usually its scored out of 30. Anything
below 25 is not good (actually, anything below 30 is not good :-). My dad is
6 but could have years left in him yet, he is physically mostly very fit.

No :-)

HTH, above all, take each day as it comes. I presume (hope) he is in a home
or at least not living by himself? Otherwise we can say his life expectancy
will be very short.

I think the "stages" are descriptions of symptoms rather than
medical descriptions of changes in the brain.  The author of
the staging system was trying to enable doctors and caregivers
to get a feeling for where a person was relative to other
people with the disease by observing their behavior.

However it is the actual changes in the brain that determine
what really happens, and these will not be the same for
all people.  Some people may have a very slow accumulation
of brain damage and others may progress more rapidly.
Some may have more damage in one area of the brain
and others have more damage in a different area - leading
to two different sets of behaviors.  Also, some may have
more capability in one area of the brain as compared to other
people so that they can cope with more damage without
showing behavioral symptoms.

There is some evidence that the earliest stages of
Alzheimer's begin decades before the onset of noticeable
symptoms.  The early changes in both brain chemistry and
behavior are very subtle.  A very insightful doctor might
be able to make a diagnosis years before another one
would - especially in the era when your Dad was diagnosed.
One doctor might have been able to make an accurate
diagnosis in 1988 while another would think there was
nothing wrong.

Your Mom's covering up for your Dad is a common thing
for a spouse to do.  She may have done it out of a sense
of loyalty to him, or out of psychological denial.  When
I was out with my Mom, or later with my Dad, I always tried
to present them to others in the most favorable light that
I could.  I wanted my parents to be okay.  I wanted to think
of them as okay and I wanted others to think of them as
okay.  Your Mom might well have been trying desperately
to hide your Dad's losses as much from herself as from
you.  It may have been the only way she could cope with it.

Now it's left to you to deal with the practical issues - to get
your Dad into Alzheimer's care, to take over his finances,
to see to it that he is as comfortable as he can be.

It's a very, very tough job.  It will take a huge amount out
of you.  But in the final analysis, it is manageable.  Take
one step at a time and make progress on it, and eventually
you'll get things under control.  There are good people
on this group and in your community who have been
through it all and can help with advice.

Good luck.

   Alan

I'm doing the very best that I can do dealing with the circumstances that I
am dealing with.  There's just been so much other stuff for me to cope with
on top of providing care for Dad. . I've gotten all of Dad's finances
sorted, and two estates straightened out...I mentioned that Mom died in
2004, what I didn't mention is that Mom's sister died 18 days before she
did.  She had no children...I was it.  So, I not only have my own family and
my Dad to care for now, I also have my elderly uncle (75 yrs old) who is now
living alone. I  cook for him and check on him twice daily and help him with
things as simple as laundry and housekeeping and paying bills....things he
had never done in his life until his wife died. Thank God he's healthy for
now. I haven't even really had the opportunity to grieve my Mother's and my
Aunt's deaths.... I've just had too much to do.

Anyways....  the reality of this situation is starting to hit me....a year
and a half later. Thanks so much to all of you, for the information, as well
as, the good advice.  It is certainly appreciated.

Torpedo (fitting name huh??....I sure got bombed)

Torpedo, they're right. Don't get hung up on stages.  Everyone changes
at a different rate. There are a lot of variables that affect how
quickly people progress.  Transitions will lead some to progress faster
for a time. Illnesses can speed the progress. Each person differs from
the next although they may share symptoms that "fit" a certain stage,
they may not have all and may have symptoms of multiple stages.

You asked about how long one can live following the diagnosis.  Some
doctors are more perceptive with picking up on beginning symptoms.
Because my MIL was able to carry on brief conversations during appts,
her physician failed to notice her increase in memory loss, confusion,
etc.  He didn't see her daily as we did. So, she probably could have
been diagnosed officially before she was.   With my FIL, he began
showing definite signs in the mid 1980s and lived until 1999.  My MIL
started showing signs around 1992-93 but we thought it was normal aging
process. In 1996-97, she was diagnosed with AD.  She just passed away
earlier this month.  Both of them were in exceptional physical health
with none of the illnesses (cardiac, vascular, pulmonary etc) normally
associated with the elderly. I think that's one reason they lived so
long following their original diagnosis.  With my FIL, a hip fx was his
turning point. He never recovered fully from it.  With MIL, her
symptoms increased, I believe, when she had a series of transitions
involving moves, placing her husband, and a new baby in our house.
Susan