Hi Everybody,

I think I read it here, but someone said that statistically, incontinence
issues are the main reason why people come to feel that placement in a
nursing home is necessary.   It was a factor when we placed Ida, but not the
only reason.   The main reason was her lack of mobility combined with the
incontinence, combined with our nearly total exhaustion from caregiving.

Having been through it for several years, I can tell you that it can be a
difficult thing to manage.   When it is simply pee, it isn't too bad, but
the other can be just awful.   It tends to get everywhere.

Add to that the fact that you are usually sleep deprived, exhausted anyway,
and having to clean up yet another disastrous mess becomes just the worst
thing going.

We usually tackled such messes as a team, the both of us mobilizing in the
cleanup.   One would escort her to the shower and do the washup, the other
to follow behind and clean up the bed, the room, the footprints leading to
the shower, the clothing etc.

I have NO idea whatsoever how one manages such a cleanup completely alone,
as it tends to be just everywhere.

The nursing home (where we put Ida eventually) had a bathroom that was also
like a big shower stall, with a proper long hose and a drain in the center
of the floor.   It was really a practical arrangement.

Home we had a stall shower with a shower chair, and the shower head on a
hose that could lift off when needed.  In any case, the nursing home was
designed far better for dealing with incontinence disasters than almost any
private home could ever be.   It was designed to minimize the hands on
contact with messes, allowing the whole place, including the fixtures, to be
hosed down with the least hassle.

Also, in the nursing home they are at WORK and they go home after their
shift is over with, that it is a professional situation like in a hospital,
and that the caregivers come in fresh each shift, I can tell you it is
really not such a bad deal.

Everyone always worries about the quality and level of care they give in a
nursing home.   I can assure you that having a frustrated, angry, exhausted
relative as caregiver, who is your child or child's spouse cleaning up a
poop disaster, is NOT preferable to having a professional clean up instead,
who is being paid to do it as their job and who has every convenience at
their fingertips to minimize the hassle.