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Medical Forum / Diseases and Disorders / Alzheimer's / May 2005Fiirst sign of granddad being nasty
Happened yesterday..... "Julian 'Penny for the guy' Hales" <julianhales@blueyonder.co.uk> wrote in message news:a8tge.37359$a9.21845@fe3.news.blueyonder.co.uk... > Happened yesterday..... How did you handle it Julian? That is what is really important.  SignatureBest Regards, Evelyn (to reply to me personally, remove 'sox') It happened when me and Anett went for a cup of tea after walking the dog, we all had cake but Arthur left crums on the floor, so Anett said that Arthur had made a mess on the floor, and granddad jump up, saw what it was and said things like its only crumps not dog sh.t, i thought u meant dog sh.t etc etc. I said that to her and me, it was a mess and then she was German and just being polite but he wouldnt give it a rest and kept saying he was right so i told him not to speak to her like that and we left soon after. After that he was fine and polite as usual as normal. I even foned my real father afterwards when i got home and they said he had been getting nasty sometimes with them. > "Julian 'Penny for the guy' Hales" <julianhales@blueyonder.co.uk> wrote in > message news:a8tge.37359$a9.21845@fe3.news.blueyonder.co.uk... [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] > > (to reply to me personally, remove 'sox') "Julian 'Penny for the guy' Hales" <julianhales@blueyonder.co.uk> wrote in message news:Veuge.37554$a9.35343@fe3.news.blueyonder.co.uk... > It happened when me and Anett went for a cup of tea after walking the dog, > we all had cake but Arthur left crums on the floor, so Anett said that [quoted text clipped - 7 lines] > real father afterwards when i got home and they said he had been getting > nasty sometimes with them. Hi Julian, That's an easy mistake to make. When someone says the dog made a mess on the floor it is usually the first thing you associate it with :-) Anyway, I don't want to scare you, but getting inordinately angry for nothing, is one of the symptoms in early stages. The most important thing for you is not to be reactive. Stay calm and matter of fact about it. Don't take anything he says as a personal offense. Just give him a little time and he'll forget all about it. Just my opinion, for what it is worth. Glad to hear you and Annet are still hanging around together. SignatureBest Regards, Evelyn (to reply to me personally, remove 'sox') I tried to look at that stage as a chance to practice my redirection techniques but I'd be lying if I said I was always successful. Sometimes the only thing to do was to get away until it erased from current memory. At least you know it won't be stored in long term memory. One thing I used to do was bring up a topic I know my MIL would get stuck on and gripe about that was a topic I could handle easier. I know that sounds like dropping a hammer on your toe to get rid of a headache. But I could um-hum my way through a rant about "why the news gives web site addresses just like everyone has a computer" much easier than a rant on a more personal topic. This was the last resort because she was still ranting. Karen > Hi Julian, > [quoted text clipped - 11 lines] > Glad to hear you and Annet are still hanging around together. > > "Julian 'Penny for the guy' Hales" <julianhales@blueyonder.co.uk> wrote in > message news:Veuge.37554$a9.35343@fe3.news.blueyonder.co.uk... > > It happened when me and Anett went for a cup of tea after walking the dog, [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] > > real father afterwards when i got home and they said he had been getting > > nasty sometimes with them. > I tried to look at that stage as a chance to practice my redirection > techniques but I'd be lying if I said I was always successful. Sometimes [quoted text clipped - 9 lines] > > Karen I will try that, not easy and he never has a bad word or gripe for anything, apart from my haircut.......... > > Hi Julian, > > [quoted text clipped - 38 lines] > > > real father afterwards when i got home and they said he had been getting > > > nasty sometimes with them. Re: Fiirst sign of granddad being nasty Group: alt.support.alzheimers Date: Thu, May 12, 2005, 9:04am (CDT+5) From: julianhales@blueyonder.co.uk (Julian 'Penny for the guy' Hales) "Karen" <kk5151@hotmail.com> wrote in message news:1185if3p2iull39@corp.supernews.com... I tried to look at that stage as a chance to practice my redirection techniques but I'd be lying if I said I was always successful. Sometimes the only thing to do was to get away until it erased from current memory. At least you know it won't be stored in long term memory. One thing I used to do was bring up a topic I know my MIL would get stuck on and gripe about that was a topic I could handle easier. I know that sounds like dropping a hammer on your toe to get rid of a headache. But I could um-hum my way through a rant about "why the news gives web site addresses just like everyone has a computer" much easier than a rant on a more personal topic. This was the last resort because she was still ranting. Karen Julian: I will try that, not easy and he never has a bad word or gripe for anything, apart from my haircut.......... Ronny: Now that last part about your haircut and your Grandad is really funny! :-) LoL > "Julian 'Penny for the guy' Hales" <julianhales@blueyonder.co.uk> wrote in > message news:Veuge.37554$a9.35343@fe3.news.blueyonder.co.uk... [quoted text clipped - 25 lines] > Glad to hear you and Annet are still hanging around together. > -- Hi Yes its a easy mistake to make, but knowing him for all these years, he would have winked or pulled a funny face as he said it, this time it was pure nastiness.... I take it he cant remember afterwards being nasty? Me and Anett are really good friends, it her exam time and shes done really well so far, so luckily i didnt screw it up for her, were out walking the dog again later and asking granddad to come too. I had a bad reaction to the tetinus after the dog bite and i couldnt belive how much she cared, she was sincerly concernd how ill i was. Im ok now but in future i think i will not say if im ill. She worries too much. Im not used to that. > Best Regards, > Evelyn > > (to reply to me personally, remove 'sox') "Julian 'Penny for the guy' Hales" <julianhales@blueyonder.co.uk> wrote in message news:b_Ege.38811$a9.32804@fe3.news.blueyonder.co.uk... Hi Julian, > I take it he cant remember afterwards being nasty? He can't remember anything for more than a second or two, if that, and it will continue that way. So if you get angry at something he did or said, he doesn't know what you are mad at. > Me and Anett are really good friends, it her exam time and shes done > really [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] > will > not say if im ill. She worries too much. Im not used to that. Julian, you ought to let the girl fuss over you a bit :-) We all need a little nurturing sometimes. SignatureBest Regards, Evelyn (to reply to me personally, remove 'sox') > "Julian 'Penny for the guy' Hales" <julianhales@blueyonder.co.uk> wrote in > message news:b_Ege.38811$a9.32804@fe3.news.blueyonder.co.uk... [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > will continue that way. So if you get angry at something he did or said, he > doesn't know what you are mad at. He had a fall a few days ago, i foun dout today so he didnt come on our walk, he just banged his knee. He wasnt there when i arrived, he walked to the supermarket, he didnt know i was coming, but a neighbour (who told me where hed gone) told him earlier i was on my way, he couldnt remember her saying that > > Me and Anett are really good friends, it her exam time and shes done > > really [quoted text clipped - 7 lines] > > Julian, you ought to let the girl fuss over you a bit :-) I stood on some glass earlier so my foot was bleeding.........she was really concerned and cleaned it up for me, im not used to anything like that from my ex, she would have laughed and not cared less. Im liking Anett look after me! > We all need a little nurturing sometimes. > -- [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > > (to reply to me personally, remove 'sox') Re: Fiirst sign of granddad being nasty Group: alt.support.alzheimers Date: Thu, May 12, 2005, 3:44pm (CDT+5) From: julianhales@blueyonder.co.uk (Julian 'Penny for the guy' Hales) "Evelyn Ruut" <mama-lionsox@hvc.rr.com> wrote in message news:e4Hge.21662$n93.9871@twister.nyc.rr.com... "Julian 'Penny for the guy' Hales" <julianhales@blueyonder.co.uk> wrote in message news:b_Ege.38811$a9.32804@fe3.news.blueyonder.co.uk... (snip) Evelyn: Julian, you ought to let the girl fuss over you a bit :-) Julian: I stood on some glass earlier so my foot was bleeding.........she was really concerned and cleaned it up for me, im not used to anything like that from my ex, she would have laughed and not cared less. Im liking Anett look after me! Ronny: See,such is really nice! LoL And I'm glad you're liking Anett looking after you. :-) Just remember to do the same for her when she needs such. :-) Sorry though to hear your Grandad fell the other day and hurt his knee. :-( Mom also fell the other day and it about scared the you know what out of me (ha) because she fell bottom down on our back concrete steps! Just so glad she has loved milk all of her life,so her doctor says she has very strong bones for someone her age! :-) Re: Fiirst sign of granddad being nasty Group: alt.support.alzheimers Date: Thu, May 12, 2005, 11:27am (CDT+5) From: mama-lionsox@hvc.rr.com (Evelyn Ruut) "Julian 'Penny for the guy' Hales" <julianhales@blueyonder.co.uk> wrote in message news:b_Ege.38811$a9.32804@fe3.news.blueyonder.co.uk... Evelyn: Hi Julian, Julian: I take it he cant remember afterwards being nasty? Evelyn: He can't remember anything for more than a second or two, if that, and it will continue that way. So if you get angry at something he did or said, he doesn't know what you are mad at. Julian: Me and Anett are really good friends, it her exam time and shes done really well so far, so luckily i didnt screw it up for her, were out walking the dog again later and asking granddad to come too. I had a bad reaction to the tetinus after the dog bite and i couldnt belive how much she cared, she was sincerly concernd how ill i was. Im ok now but in future i think i will not say if im ill. She worries too much. Im not used to that. Evelyn: Julian, you ought to let the girl fuss over you a bit :-) We all need a little nurturing sometimes. SignatureBest Regards, Evelyn (to reply to me personally, remove 'sox') Ronny: We're going to have to figure out some way that Julian can be comfortable with Anett fussing over him at times! :-) LoL And oh that is nice when you have someone to do that now & then! :-)(BG) Re: Fiirst sign of granddad being nasty Group: alt.support.alzheimers Date: Thu, May 12, 2005, 9:04am (CDT+5) From: julianhales@blueyonder.co.uk (Julian 'Penny for the guy' Hales) "Evelyn Ruut" <mama-lionsox@hvc.rr.com> wrote in message news:6Ovge.21609$n93.16129@twister.nyc.rr.com... (snip) Hi Julian, That's an easy mistake to make. When someone says the dog made a mess on the floor it is usually the first thing you associate it with :-) Anyway, I don't want to scare you, but getting inordinately angry for nothing, is one of the symptoms in early stages. The most important thing for you is not to be reactive. Stay calm and matter of fact about it. Don't take anything he says as a personal offense. Just give him a little time and he'll forget all about it. Just my opinion, for what it is worth. Glad to hear you and Annet are still hanging around together. -- Julian to Evelyn: Hi Yes its a easy mistake to make, but knowing him for all these years, he would have winked or pulled a funny face as he said it, this time it was pure nastiness.... I take it he cant remember afterwards being nasty? Ronny: Nah,he really can't remember. Julian to Evelyn: Me and Anett are really good friends, it her exam time and shes done really well so far, so luckily i didnt screw it up for her, were out walking the dog again later and asking granddad to come too. I had a bad reaction to the tetinus after the dog bite and i couldnt belive how much she cared, she was sincerly concernd how ill i was. Im ok now but in future i think i will not say if im ill. She worries too much. Im not used to that. Ronny: Ah now Julian,you're supposed to let Annet baby you some. :-) And don't you find such even the least little bit nice! LoL And remember some people worry a bit more than others and there's not a thing you can do about that. > Fiirst sign of granddad being nasty > [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] > Happened yesterday..... > --- Ronny: Sorry to hear that happened. Just gotta try and keep your cool and not take such personally as Evelyn said. Which is not always easy;but is the best way. > Fiirst sign of granddad being nasty > [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] > Happened yesterday..... > --- Ronny: Sorry to hear that happened. Just gotta try and keep your cool and not take such personally as Evelyn said. Which is not always easy;but is the best way. Thanks. I know if i walk away i wont see him again, not the man i knew for all those years. So now we do fun things together while hes still okish Re: Fiirst sign of granddad being nasty Group: alt.support.alzheimers Date: Thu, May 12, 2005, 9:04am (CDT+5) From: julianhales@blueyonder.co.uk (Julian 'Penny for the guy' Hales) "Ronny TX" <Acts17-11@webtv.net> wrote in message news:13923-4282B6D1-39@storefull-3331.bay.webtv.net... Fiirst sign of granddad being nasty Group: alt.support.alzheimers Date: Wed, May 11, 2005, 7:35pm (CDT+5) From: julianhales@blueyonder.co.uk (Julian 'Penny for the guy' Hales) Happened yesterday..... --- Ronny: Sorry to hear that happened. Just gotta try and keep your cool and not take such personally as Evelyn said. Which is not always easy;but is the best way. Julian: Thanks. I know if i walk away i wont see him again, not the man i knew for all those years. So now we do fun things together while hes still okish Ronny: Now that's the way to look at it! :-) Enjoy what you can together now. Like me and my Mom-she comes out to our backyard and I sit with her a bit just to talk and she has a good time when she sees the 14 little chickens with their Mama Hen. (ha) Not a big thing;but she enjoys such and I enjoy seeing her enjoy such. :-) Just little things like that,that others might take for granted;but which,I surely don't. |
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