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Medical Forum / Diseases and Disorders / Alzheimer's / May 2005thoughts?
any thoughts on discouraging someone from feeling the need to be in the carer's physical space all the time? My MIL has taken to following me EVERYWHERE - or, if I'm sitting at my desk, to coming over within inches of me and just standing here staring at me .... I'm feeling extremely crowded, frustrated and tense - it doesn't MATTER if she can't read whatever I'm typing or anything - having her stand so close STARING is giving me the creeps and I want her to stop! I ask her what she wants "nothing; I'm just stretching my legs" ...which is what she USED to say when she was pacing in the evenings.... God, I wish she'd go back to pacing :( Ended up in a tug of war at the bathroom door every time I've gone in there today ... haven't even TRIED to have a bath ...waiting for hubby to get home - he can mamasit while I have a soak and try to unwind. I don't know how much longer I can do this caregiving gig.... was one thing when I could DO other things while I was here with her, but these days........... > any thoughts on discouraging someone from feeling the need to be in the > carer's physical space all the time? My MIL has taken to following me [quoted text clipped - 16 lines] > thing when I could DO other things while I was here with her, but these > days........... Lee, I don't have any brilliant ideas for you. Obviously, things have gone beyond your ability to cope alone/with hubby's occasional help. You need outside help, I'd say. Easy to say, not so easy to do, I know. I can offer cyberhugs of understanding, though. As a lurker, I'm going to take a chance and anticiptate the majority response. Contact your local Alzheimer's group. Find them in the 'phone book. Tell whoever you first speak with how overwhelmed you are, and ask them to refer you to someone who can give you *tangible*, cut-to-the-chase help. You need to have an earnest with your husband, too, I'd suppose. Be kind and loving to him and his mother, but don't sugarcoat it too much. You've been dealing with this for a good, long while, if I remember correctly. You've done enough alone. You need help. You deserve help. Go for it, Lee. Best wishes, Deborah (usually just a lurker) thanks... have talked to them ... hasn't worked to go to any of the support groups as I use my home care hours up to work - none left for other stuff... and when you add significant travel time, it just wouldn't work .... home care has helped us keep going this long... but I think we're getting maxed out.... or rather, I'M MAXED OUT So many stressors... looks like work is going to be awfully touch and go through the summer semester, so get the ~joy~ of money worries (2 kids moving out on their own and off to college this fall ACK!) on top of everything else Anyway ... haven't told hubby yet, but guess who's staying home with her this weekend? It AIN'T ME! I'm taking at least one day ~off~ ... as in going to work for him so he can stay home. >> any thoughts on discouraging someone from feeling the need to be in the >> carer's physical space all the time? My MIL has taken to following me [quoted text clipped - 37 lines] > Best wishes, > Deborah (usually just a lurker) > thanks... have talked to them ... hasn't worked to go to any of the > support groups as I use my home care hours up to work - none left for [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] > this weekend? It AIN'T ME! I'm taking at least one day ~off~ ... as in > going to work for him so he can stay home. Lee, it sounds to me like you absolutely need to start looking for placement, even if you don't plan to actually place her now. You just aren't getting enough help or enough free time to keep your sanity. It is a tough job, but it's more than just that, it is emotionally draining and exhausting to never have any time to yourself. Try and inquire around if any nursing homes in your area do what is called "respite" care. That means they can take her for a week or two so you can get a break.  SignatureBest Regards, Evelyn http://www.buddhistchannel.tv/index.php?index (to reply to me personally, remove 'sox') Don't forget...you have a life too. When it gets to be too much for you, the best solution IMHO is to place your loved one in a care facility and let the professionals deal with it. And BTW...I seriously doubt that you will have any success in trying to change her behavior. I'm thinking you will have to accept it or separate yourself from it. SignatureJohn Inzer > any thoughts on discouraging someone from feeling the need to be in the > carer's physical space all the time? My MIL has taken to following me [quoted text clipped - 16 lines] > thing when I could DO other things while I was here with her, but these > days........... *sigh* If only ... I'm just the daughter in law... sort of .... unfortunately, even though I DO the majority of the care, I have none of the decision making ~power~ those who do started the process, then stopped... suspect it's going to take a major breakdown/tantrum on my part to get the ball rolling again :( > Don't forget...you have a life too. When it > gets to be too much for you, the best solution [quoted text clipped - 26 lines] >> thing when I could DO other things while I was here with her, but these >> days........... You need to try and change that situation, because as you are finding , 24x7 care, even for a couple, becomes close to impossible to provide, certainly without affecting the health of the carers. You may find you need to force the situation, perhaps by getting those with the authority to care. I think most here would agree that people who arent doing 24x7 caring have no idea how stressful it is. Until they do, they have no incentive to change their behaviour. SignatureTumbleweed email replies not necessary but to contact use; tumbleweednews at hotmail dot com > *sigh* If only ... I'm just the daughter in law... sort of .... > unfortunately, even though I DO the majority of the care, I have none of [quoted text clipped - 35 lines] >>> thing when I could DO other things while I was here with her, but these >>> days........... Have you considered going on strike? Just kidding, but I had to push hard to get Hubby to accept that he needed to learn about his Mom's business affairs and how I handled them. I recently reaped the rewards of that strategy when I broke a wrist and he had to do everything involving writing. It would have been hard to train him then with pain meds in me. :-) It may feel selfish or weak, but it's really for the loved one's good to have caregivers that aren't on the last nerve and to have more than one caregiver available. Think about it -- what would happen if you caught the flu or fell and broke something and were laid up. Someone (or ones) would have to do it and it would be better for everyone if the training occurred when planned instead of when forced. It may seem like something that doesn't require training, but you know the tricks others may not to get her to bathe, eat or calm down. Best that knowledge be shared now than when a crisis hits. Karen > *sigh* If only ... I'm just the daughter in law... sort of .... > unfortunately, even though I DO the majority of the care, I have none of the [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] > suspect it's going to take a major breakdown/tantrum on my part to get the > ball rolling again :( Todays postings have hit upon almost all my problems ..I am just about frazzled out. I only wish I had looked into caretaking earlier.. I did try daycare--three times my husband went then refused to go---So-- stupidly I didn't try again.when he was a bit more docile..(He refused to get out of the car) Monday, my son & I are taking Don "to be inspected" (my term) to an assisted living place for respite (2 months hopefully) It's a start.. I pray he gets a passing mark. He's still pretty much continent--well at least I know the signals for that---only hope they catch on to the signals. Feeds himself without distractions. Showers, shaves and dresses with directions as to sequence. Says 'thank you' frequently... I feel really awful about doing this...It's been a long slow descent. I saw the beginnings in 1993 but 1995 stands out...3 speeding tickets on vacation...There was many trials along the way--the driving ,the anger, so so many loving deceptions--etc > Todays postings have hit upon almost all my problems ..I am just about > frazzled out. [quoted text clipped - 15 lines] > vacation...There was many trials along the way--the driving ,the anger, > so so many loving deceptions--etc Dont feel bad Florence, it simply isnt possible for one person to look after an Az person 24x7,and even if it was, it isnt safe. You will probably do this anyway, but if your husband is going to be like most, the lesson we learned was do not, under any account, tell your husband he will be going into care/a home/whatever, ahead of time. Or even on the day. The only way we got my father into respite was to tell him he was going for a check up. Consider putting the suitcase in the car ahead of time s he doesnt see it. And get it out, whilst the doctor is talking to him or he is otherwise distracted. My father refused point blank to go to respite, even when we told him (aka lied) that it was just for an overnight checkup. My mother was going on holiday for a week but he insisted he could look after himself. (there was no way he could look after himself for 5 minutes). So, I dont know how your husband will react but if he didnt want to go to a day centre (same as my father) chances are he wont want to go into respite care so be careful how you present it. Finally, if he doesnt get a 'pass mark' then how can *you* be expected to look after him? Good luck. SignatureTumbleweed email replies not necessary but to contact use; tumbleweednews at hotmail dot com > Todays postings have hit upon almost all my problems ..I am just about > frazzled out. [quoted text clipped - 15 lines] > vacation...There was many trials along the way--the driving ,the anger, > so so many loving deceptions--etc Oh Florence, I really feel for you and know what you are going through. Ida didn't want to go to daycare either and she complained every time they came for her. She would tell the person doing the pickup that day "they throwing me out, I no want to go but they throw me out!" I felt bad about it, but I needed that time so desperately that if I didn't have that little respite I would not have been able to keep her here at ALL! When your husband goes into respite care, you will be astonished at a couple of things....(I was) 1. How well they handle the worst behavior. They are professionals and don't think they haven't already seen it all before. 2. How quickly your husband will adjust and adapt to the routine of life there. 3. He may never stop asking to "go home" whenever he sees you... and no matter how upsetting or unnerving it is to you, you will know that the asking will cease the minute you go out the door. SignatureBest Regards, Evelyn (to reply to me personally, remove 'sox') Florence A <smada@webtv.net> is alleged to have said: > I feel really awful about doing this...It's been a long slow descent. I > saw the beginnings in 1993 but 1995 stands out...3 speeding tickets on > vacation...There was many trials along the way--the driving ,the anger, > so so many loving deceptions--etc This reminds me of one of the first signs of trouble with my mom, if I had recognized it. We had always travelled together well, she liked to see new places and things, eat out, and people watch. Then she started being a pill to travel with, didn't want to go anywhere or do anything. At the time, it didn't seem like a reason to look for a doctor. Probably because I knew very little about AD. SignatureJo Ann Malina, make spamthis best to find my address Better by far you should forget and smile Than that you should remember and be sad. -- Christina Rossetti, "Remember" > any thoughts on discouraging someone from feeling the need to be in the > carer's physical space all the time? My MIL has taken to following me [quoted text clipped - 16 lines] > thing when I could DO other things while I was here with her, but these > days........... Hi Lee, I know the feeling....... The thing that really helped us the most was getting my mother in law into daycare. For the first couple of years, every morning the bus came and took her to the daycare center, and it was a lifesaver for our sanity. I had a couple of blissful hours of normal life every day while she was safe, kept busy and occupied, and when she came back home I was able to cope better. Later on we took her out of daycare because all she tended to do was sleep most of the day by that time. SignatureBest Regards, Evelyn http://www.buddhistchannel.tv/index.php?index (to reply to me personally, remove 'sox') we have 18 hours a week of home care - during which I go to work.... it's just not enough any more... I was gone all day today - which is no doubt WHY she was SO demanding and on my last nerve... by the time I had been home for 2 hours with her standing here STARING at me, and following me even into the bathroom I had had it. Day care won't take her ... I tried, but use of depends and needing assistance to change them = nope... in other words, if you NEED day care, you're not welcome :( >> any thoughts on discouraging someone from feeling the need to be in the >> carer's physical space all the time? My MIL has taken to following me [quoted text clipped - 27 lines] > daycare because all she tended to do was sleep most of the day by that > time. > Day care won't take her ... I tried, but use of depends and needing > assistance to change them = nope... in other words, if you NEED day care, > you're not welcome :( i would have echoed evelyn's suggestion of day care. it's too bad they won't take her now. if you haven't started looking for a care facility, you should do so now; ask your local alzheimers' association for referrals. it sounds like she needs a different type of care than you can provide, and you need a rest. there may be facilities that will let you place her there for respite care for a week or two, which sounds like something you need. > we have 18 hours a week of home care - during which I go to work.... it's > just not enough any more... I was gone all day today - which is no doubt [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] > assistance to change them = nope... in other words, if you NEED day care, > you're not welcome :( Wow, Lee. That just isn't fair. Our daycare center is run by a home care agency, and they not only changed depends, but entire outfits as well. They also gave baths, got haircuts accomplished, and picked up and dropped off.....daily. They didn't do it on weekends, so I had her all weekend. Occasionally I had my neighbor sit for an evening or an afternoon, but for the most part our daycare here was just wonderful. I would advise you to keep on looking. There are sometimes nursing homes that will do daycare too. The nursing home (where we eventually placed Ida) did a daycare center too, but it was more expensive. SignatureBest Regards, Evelyn http://www.buddhistchannel.tv/index.php?index (to reply to me personally, remove 'sox') we live in a small town - not a lot of options within reasonable driving distance - actually none - there is just that one day program, and choices of LTC facilities are extremely limited as well - 1 of the 4 available consistently comes up as a NO GO from people who have worked there; another is consistantly highly recommended - of course, that would be the expensive one of the bunch she's less obnoxious today - had one of our best home care givers in while I was out today (yesterday, her daughter did it) ... think that's one of the key differences in how she handles my absences, actually - who's with her while I'm away. She's fine with the home care ladies we have now (I've learned to be quite ~assertive~ about which of the available ladies we can/will tolerate - had a few that were just NOT COMPETENT, and have successfully made it clear to the agency that I won't have any of those back) >> we have 18 hours a week of home care - during which I go to work.... >> it's just not enough any more... I was gone all day today - which is no [quoted text clipped - 16 lines] > that will do daycare too. The nursing home (where we eventually placed > Ida) did a daycare center too, but it was more expensive. thoughts? Group: alt.support.alzheimers Date: Thu, May 5, 2005, 9:04pm (CDT+1) From: sleeplessinwherever@hotmail.com (lee) any thoughts on discouraging someone from feeling the need to be in the carer's physical space all the time? My MIL has taken to following me EVERYWHERE - or, if I'm sitting at my desk, to coming over within inches of me and just standing here staring at me .... I'm feeling extremely crowded, frustrated and tense - it doesn't MATTER if she can't read whatever I'm typing or anything - having her stand so close STARING is giving me the creeps and I want her to stop! I ask her what she wants "nothing; I'm just stretching my legs" ...which is what she USED to say when she was pacing in the evenings.... God, I wish she'd go back to pacing :( Ended up in a tug of war at the bathroom door every time I've gone in there today ... haven't even TRIED to have a bath ...waiting for hubby to get home - he can mamasit while I have a soak and try to unwind. I don't know how much longer I can do this caregiving gig.... was one thing when I could DO other things while I was here with her, but these days........... Ronny: Oh mercy,I feel for you :-( and I have no bright ideas to help after reading all of the posts in this thread. And so far my Mom isn't as bad as your MIL,except that sometimes she won't hardly let me get a nap-keeps waking me up,etc. (sigh) And I can go to the bathroom or take a bath with no problems. Except sometimes Mom is right outside the door and I don't know that. So I open the bathroom door at times,she's right there and that sometimes sorta scares me for a second!LoL As for the daycare not taking your MIL because she needs help with her Depends,that just makes me want to cuss them. Which doesn't help I know. Well,it might for a short while. :-) I'm glad your MIL gets the 18 hours a week homecare;but then you have to be working then! Not good! (sigh) You really need that time to yourself! So all I can say is that somethings got to give with your husband and kids both. Both of those need to take on more where they can and get you some rest! kids don't live here - although my oldest does, and can, come up and give me a break - she even does bathing and toileting (although she SWORE she never would LOL) She spent most of last summer with us, which was a HUGE help. Thinking to bring her up this week coming ... not really fair to expect MY family to help out when it's his mom, not mine ... but when she's available, it does help One of my partner's sisters is local, but we've pretty much maxed her out too - she has her a couple of times a week and when I'm stuck; i.e. when I won't get back from work before the end of home care hours and so on > thoughts? > Group: alt.support.alzheimers Date: Thu, May 5, 2005, 9:04pm (CDT+1) [quoted text clipped - 34 lines] > kids both. Both of those need to take on more where they can and get you > some rest! > Re: thoughts? > [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > toileting (although she SWORE she never > would LOL) Ronny: I can especially sympathise with her on that last part! LoL Well,sometimes my stomach is strong and sometimes it's not.:-) Lately it's been not! LoL Have no idea what makes the difference on that from say day to day or week to week? > Lee: > She spent most of last summer with us, [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > when it's his mom, not mine ... but when > she's available, it does help Ronny: That was good of her. :-) And on the other part,it is you daughter's grandma and family is family. So the way I see it family should help how and when they can. Which is a whole different thing from some actually doing that of course! > Lee: > One of my partner's sisters is local, [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > get back from work before the end of > home care hours and so on Ronny: What bugged me a couple of times awhile back was when I was 10 to 20 minutes late getting back from grocery shopping and such and the lady here from home health care had locked the door and left. I know,my fault;but I would of felt a lot better about it if I had known she absolutely had to leave when she did. I just don't know if she did or not? Sometimes I think not when it was late in the evening and she was just going home. Oh well,changed my ways and try to make sure now I'm ready to leave for town,grocery shopping,etc. right after she gets here. That way if something takes longer than I counted on,I can still be back home before her leave time. Ronny she's not my daughters' grandmother - really very little connection - I raised the girls by myself for 18 years - THEN met my partner; they've never lived with us or anything .... so it's not like he's even a stepdad or anything - and they certainly wouldn't regard her as a grandparent. If they'd been younger maybe - except then I would not be with him LOL I didn't date when I had the girls at home. It's my partner's sibs that SHOULD be doing it, really - or their (also adult) kids ... but that ain't gonna happen. The one does try, but she has some ~limitations~ - most notably that she just doesn't ~get~ it and really isn't a 'caregiver' type of person. Another only shows up for weddings and funerals, and even then doesn't stay one minute longer than she has to; t'other used to help out with the occassional weekend, but then she found the will and didn't like it so........... long story there, not worth getting into - suffice to say, she's not involved in any significant way at this point (although she is on both POAs, jointly with my partner - a royal pain). MY kid should not have to travel 4 hours each way to come up here and give me a break - but she's willing, and she's good with ma ... and, this time, I have some paid work for her to do as well, for one of my customers - so she'll make some money too, beyond what we give her for helping out. She's coming by bus on Monday; I'll take her home Thursday or Friday so that she'll be back for her weekend job. LMAO my MIL is worried that the dog won't share her drink ... she's trying to convince him that he should drink water from a glass and he just won't co operate! That's a real worry, that they would leave before you got back. Our home care workers aren't allowed to; it's documented on our file. If I'm running late, I'll call, and if need be, arrange for someone else to get here - but if none of that works, they have to stay. >> Re: thoughts? >> [quoted text clipped - 47 lines] > home before her leave time. > Ronny Re: thoughts? Group: alt.support.alzheimers Date: Sat, May 7, 2005, 7:01pm (CDT+1) From: sleeplessinwherever@hotmail.com (lee) she's not my daughters' grandmother - really very little connection - I raised the girls by myself for 18 years - THEN met my partner; they've never lived with us or anything .... so it's not like he's even a stepdad or anything - and they certainly wouldn't regard her as a grandparent. If they'd been younger maybe - except then I would not be with him LOL I didn't date when I had the girls at home. Ronny: Oh OK,now I understand better. Lee: It's my partner's sibs that SHOULD be doing it, really - or their (also adult) kids ... but that ain't gonna happen. The one does try, but she has some ~limitations~ - most notably that she just doesn't ~get~ it and really isn't a 'caregiver' type of person. Another only shows up for weddings and funerals, and even then doesn't stay one minute longer than she has to; t'other used to help out with the occassional weekend, but then she found the will and didn't like it so........... long story there, not worth getting into - suffice to say, she's not involved in any significant way at this point (although she is on both POAs, jointly with my partner - a royal pain). Ronny: Ah,so y'all have some PITA's on your hands-especially that last one! (ha) Sorry to hear that for your sake! :-( Lee: MY kid should not have to travel 4 hours each way to come up here and give me a break - but she's willing, and she's good with ma ... and, this time, I have some paid work for her to do as well, for one of my customers - so she'll make some money too, beyond what we give her for helping out. She's coming by bus on Monday; I'll take her home Thursday or Friday so that she'll be back for her weekend job. Ronny: Good for your kid! :-) Can see she is a heck of a lot more help than the ones that should really be doing more helping! BTW,you want I should tell them off? :-) I'm not in that great of a mood tonight,so now would be the perfect time! :-) LoL Lee: LMAO my MIL is worried that the dog won't share her drink ... she's trying to convince him that he should drink water from a glass and he just won't co operate! Ronny: I could also tell the dog that he's supposed to cooperate! :-) LoL Lee: That's a real worry, that they would leave before you got back. Our home care workers aren't allowed to; it's documented on our file. If I'm running late, I'll call, and if need be, arrange for someone else to get here - but if none of that works, they have to stay. Ronny: I wish it was that way here. I can't talk on the phone,bad hearing;but if I knew I was going to be way late,I would definately get someone to call far me. Just thought she would stay 10 or 20 minutes longer late in the evening those couple of times and then take that time back by leaving earlier the next day. taking her back tomorrow - but if she doesn't get another weekday type job will likely have her come back up again soon - although when I'm already stressed out from dealing with ma and then SHE snarls at me, makes me think maybe that's not the best idea.... *sigh* if nothing else, she tends to ~get~ my frustration better.... I was having a very bad day with ma yesterday and my partner's comment was "remember, she doesn't mean it" .... that's supposed to fix everything. I KNOW she doesn't mean to irritate the hell out of me - that's half the problem... she goes on for hours, eventually I snap at her, then she's upset .... and I get to feel like crap ... 'she doesn't mean it' is NOT HELPFUL.... just adds to my guilt and frustration kid saw for herself how aggravating ma can be .... just joked that "yep, that could drive you to drink' Re: thoughts? Group: alt.support.alzheimers Date: Sat, May 7, 2005, 7:01pm (CDT+1) From: sleeplessinwherever@hotmail.com (lee) she's not my daughters' grandmother - really very little connection - I raised the girls by myself for 18 years - THEN met my partner; they've never lived with us or anything .... so it's not like he's even a stepdad or anything - and they certainly wouldn't regard her as a grandparent. If they'd been younger maybe - except then I would not be with him LOL I didn't date when I had the girls at home. Ronny: Oh OK,now I understand better. Lee: It's my partner's sibs that SHOULD be doing it, really - or their (also adult) kids ... but that ain't gonna happen. The one does try, but she has some ~limitations~ - most notably that she just doesn't ~get~ it and really isn't a 'caregiver' type of person. Another only shows up for weddings and funerals, and even then doesn't stay one minute longer than she has to; t'other used to help out with the occassional weekend, but then she found the will and didn't like it so........... long story there, not worth getting into - suffice to say, she's not involved in any significant way at this point (although she is on both POAs, jointly with my partner - a royal pain). Ronny: Ah,so y'all have some PITA's on your hands-especially that last one! (ha) Sorry to hear that for your sake! :-( Lee: MY kid should not have to travel 4 hours each way to come up here and give me a break - but she's willing, and she's good with ma ... and, this time, I have some paid work for her to do as well, for one of my customers - so she'll make some money too, beyond what we give her for helping out. She's coming by bus on Monday; I'll take her home Thursday or Friday so that she'll be back for her weekend job. Ronny: Good for your kid! :-) Can see she is a heck of a lot more help than the ones that should really be doing more helping! BTW,you want I should tell them off? :-) I'm not in that great of a mood tonight,so now would be the perfect time! :-) LoL Lee: LMAO my MIL is worried that the dog won't share her drink ... she's trying to convince him that he should drink water from a glass and he just won't co operate! Ronny: I could also tell the dog that he's supposed to cooperate! :-) LoL Lee: That's a real worry, that they would leave before you got back. Our home care workers aren't allowed to; it's documented on our file. If I'm running late, I'll call, and if need be, arrange for someone else to get here - but if none of that works, they have to stay. Ronny: I wish it was that way here. I can't talk on the phone,bad hearing;but if I knew I was going to be way late,I would definately get someone to call far me. Just thought she would stay 10 or 20 minutes longer late in the evening those couple of times and then take that time back by leaving earlier the next day. Re: thoughts? Group: alt.support.alzheimers Date: Thu, May 12, 2005, 1:07am (CDT+1) From: sleeplessinwherever@hotmail.com (lee) taking her back tomorrow - but if she doesn't get another weekday type job will likely have her come back up again soon - although when I'm already stressed out from dealing with ma and then SHE snarls at me, makes me think maybe that's not the best idea.... *sigh* if nothing else, she tends to ~get~ my frustration better.... I was having a very bad day with ma yesterday and my partner's comment was "remember, she doesn't mean it" .... that's supposed to fix everything. I KNOW she doesn't mean to irritate the hell out of me - that's half the problem... she goes on for hours, eventually I snap at her, then she's upset .... and I get to feel like crap ... 'she doesn't mean it' is NOT HELPFUL.... just adds to my guilt and frustration kid saw for herself how aggravating ma can be .... just joked that "yep, that could drive you to drink' Ronny: What you said here reminds me that it wouldn't be that bad of an idea for me to again make some of my very cheap homemade wine! :-) LoL Haven't made any in over a year! And not sure I should call it wine? :-) When I use frozen or bottled apple juice,honey or sugar and yeast? (ha) Such is usually ready to be drawn off in about 3 weeks into a clean wine bottle. It's a bit stout too,so just a little goes a long way in calming me down! LoL Just don't tell my two older sisters that I ever make such! LoL |
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