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Medical Forum / Diseases and Disorders / Alzheimer's / April 2005Loving deception
One thing I have had to do with both my parents....one thing I had trouble with since about the only good thing I say we had was honesty...I now find myself telling them little "white lies" so keep the peace....IE...yeah we will go home later.....no I dont have a way to take you there....no you cant go out.. its Sunday the bars are closed......etc etc. Its been hard and I feel a little guilty each time but it helps me keep my sanity...arguing with them is like beating my head against a brick wall...B What are you talking about?? UH DUH do try to keep up...what are asking about...IDIOT Re: Loving deception Group: alt.support.alzheimers Date: Mon, Mar 21, 2005, 9:00am (CST-2) From: burglar_of_turds@yahoo.com (J) What are you talking about?? I work in an Alzheimer's Assisted Living and we call them "theraputic fibs." Much better than fighting battles that just end up making them upset. You shouldn't feel guilty about this at all. I lost my mother to AD about 3 years ago after 17 years of grief and guilt. You learn to side-step the issues, and only take on the really important battles. Loving deception, theraputic fibs, it's all about keeping them as calm and happy as possible. > UH DUH do try to keep up...what are asking about...IDIOT > [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > From: burglar_of_turds@yahoo.com (J) > What are you talking about?? My mom and I cared for my grandmother with Alzheimer's for three years before she died--you learn to pick your battles. It usually took "theraputic fibs" to keep her calm and, most importantly, safe. She usually didn't know what was going on anyway, why not let her think she could go home later and that I (70 years younger than her) was her sister? She had a tendency to leave the house and wander off when she got upset; making her happy was a better alternative than pressing the truth, which is often irrelevant anyway. |
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